What Is Your Most Gross, Yucky, Disgusting Nursing Horror Story?

[yazisizit]

I was working a night shift on a tele floor as a new Nurse.

We had this one poor old lady who was confused and was restrained as usual for her safety. She was our designated resident nightmare geri from hell, so she was placed near the Nurse's station.

So we are chilling out at the Nurse's station, chatting and trying to get through another night...

Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I see our lady in question standing in the dimly lit doorway of her room!

I instantly leap out and run to her. As I approach her, she appears to be falling towards me, so I meet her in a bear hug...my arms around her waste, and her arms around my shoulders.

As I catch the lady, I notice a very strong smell of feces, and I feel something warm on my hands, arms and shoulders...

My fellow heroes come in behind me, and as the lights are turned on, my worst fears are instantly realized.

Yes, I caught the poor old lady with a good old bear hung football catch, but I was also covered in the lady's feces.

As I look at her, she has feces smeared all over her arms and hands... (and even her face!)

And of course, now so did I!

[FranEMTnurse, CNA, LPN, EMT-I]

my friend, you have got that statement down to a science. i love it, and [color=olive]is why i'm writing this message in these two colors. remind you of anything????????:rotfl: :rotfl:

[color=#808000]see, she made a memory for ya. hahahahahahaha!!!!!!! i have no idea why you didn't tell your husband though. don't you think he'd understand???:roll

i've been a nurse since '86 and i have a million gross stories.

one of my favourites was a few years ago, a patient whose labour was being induced with cervidil tape (applied directly to the cervix) handed me something when i entered the room. i held it in my bare hand puzzled, when she said in a gravelly, tequila-and-4-packs-a-day voice, "hit fell outta mah cooter."

like the smooth professional i am, when i realized it had been in her lady parts, i screamed and tossed it on the floor. i ate lunch with my hand held behind my back, because i was convinced i could still smell her crotchal area on my fingers*. ick.

*i never told my husband...

[nurseunderwater]

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

[lucky928]

Oh goodness, I work in a geriatric psychiatric unit, and there are so many strories to tell... id have to narrow it down to these 2.

We had one very demented lady who used to hoard things in her clothing, and hair, and was constantly mumbling nonsense. Well, it was shower time and I noticed something coming from in between her legs. I got out some napkins,and a pencap. When I noticed there was more, I had to get my charge nurse. Now, keep in mind this is a very large older woman who was screaming and yelling the entire time. It took 3 of us to get the rest out ( 2 to hold her down, 1 to dig) We got a p-nut butter and jelly sandwich out of her lady parts.Who knows how long it had been there, but it didnt smell pretty.

Can anyone tell me does this happen often with elderly women? I know every case is different...But this scares me!:uhoh21: OMG

I will never eat another PB&J sandwhich again:nono:

Lucky

[ktwlpn, LPN]

. I held it in my bare hand puzzled, when she said in a gravelly, tequila-and-4-packs-a-day voice, "Hit fell outta mah cooter."

Like the smooth professional I am, when I realized it had been in her lady parts, I screamed and tossed it on the floor. I ate lunch with my hand held behind my back, because I was convinced I could still smell her crotchal area on my fingers*. Ick.

I never told my husband...

I forgot to add---after you wash,wash ,wash ya hands do a final scrub with shaving cream.....Takes care of that lingering odor..sometimes after dealing with a particulary smelly impaction -even double gloved- I think I can smell that odor on my fingers....argh....

[jkaee]

We had one very demented lady who used to hoard things in her clothing, and hair, and was constantly mumbling nonsense. Well, it was shower time and I noticed something coming from in between her legs. I got out some napkins,and a pencap. When I noticed there was more, I had to get my charge nurse. Now, keep in mind this is a very large older woman who was screaming and yelling the entire time. It took 3 of us to get the rest out ( 2 to hold her down, 1 to dig) We got a p-nut butter and jelly sandwich out of her lady parts.Who knows how long it had been there, but it didnt smell pretty.

Can anyone tell me does this happen often with elderly women? I know every case is different...But this scares me!:uhoh21: OMG

I will never eat another PB&J sandwhich again:nono:

Lucky

Yes, this happens quite often with our demented older gals. In fact, I have one resident that is not allowed to own any beanie babies, because she likes to "insert" them in her nether regions. She was given a bunny beanie baby for Easter.....we had to keep a close eye on it......imagine seeing 2 bunny ears sticking out of her cooch!!!!

:imbar

"Here comes Peter Cottontail.....hopping down the bunny trail..." :chuckle

[BRANDY LPN]

i had a male LTC res. once who would stick various objects in his rear when ever he was mad at the staff, the list includes but is def. not limited to: T-shirts, washclothes, the arm rest of a wheel chair, forks (after that he was only allowed spoons on his dinner tray), and the worst one was his roommates teeth. (sorta gives a whole new meaning to bite my ***.) BTW the facility had to buy new teeth for the roommate.

[lucky928]

Yes, this happens quite often with our demented older gals. In fact, I have one resident that is not allowed to own any beanie babies, because she likes to "insert" them in her nether regions. She was given a bunny beanie baby for Easter.....we had to keep a close eye on it......imagine seeing 2 bunny ears sticking out of her cooch!!!!

:imbar

"Here comes Peter Cottontail.....hopping down the bunny trail..." :chuckle

I will never think about rabbits the same either!!!Poor easter Bunny~

Lucky!

[ktwlpn, LPN]

i had a male LTC res. once who would stick various objects in his rear when ever he was mad at the staff, QUOTE] That says it all about dementia...."If you people MESS with ME I'll have something for YOU......" (bends over and inserts hair brush in own rectum ) "See! I warned you-now get it out !"

[chaosRN, ASN, RN]

Originally posted by UK2USA

Don't you believe it.... many is the time that I have been looking after a child on PICU who has had diarrhoea so bad that it has been pouring off the bed (and I mean from both sides of the bed). The first thing you have to think of is "where am I going to stand so that I am not covered in this"

Oh my, my story isn't half as gross as others, but it was at the time. When I was in ICU, we had this pt 300-400lbs, in isolation (C-diff & MRSA I think). So when you entered the room, you had to gown, glove, mask, etc.. Someone walked by the room smelling something. I worked nights, so the lights were off. Turned on the lights, There was dirrhea EVERYWHERE. Pouring off the bed, both sides & headed toward the end. This pt was on a vent & sedated. We had to clean the floors before the pt so we had a place to stand. That was not a pretty sight!

[TDub, MSN, EdD]

ARGH! How the heck did he get a ARMREST in there?!?!

[FranEMTnurse, CNA, LPN, EMT-I]

This story reminds me of a (joke???) I was recently told. I will just say, those poor gerbils. It was disgusting to say the least. The person who told it to me thought it was funny, but when she asked me if I agreed, I replied, "I think it's disgusting." I didn't realize mankind would get that degenerated!!!!

i had a male LTC res. once who would stick various objects in his rear when ever he was mad at the staff, the list includes but is def. not limited to: T-shirts, washclothes, the arm rest of a wheel chair, forks (after that he was only allowed spoons on his dinner tray), and the worst one was his roommates teeth. (sorta gives a whole new meaning to bite my ***.) BTW the facility had to buy new teeth for the roommate.

[BRANDY LPN]

ARGH! How the heck did he get a ARMREST in there?!?!

Who knows. but was an indication to up the Depo.