I was working a night shift on a tele floor as a new Nurse.
We had this one poor old lady who was confused and was restrained as usual for her safety. She was our designated resident nightmare geri from hell, so she was placed near the Nurse's station.
So we are chilling out at the Nurse's station, chatting and trying to get through another night...
Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I see our lady in question standing in the dimly lit doorway of her room!
I instantly leap out and run to her. As I approach her, she appears to be falling towards me, so I meet her in a bear hug...my arms around her waste, and her arms around my shoulders.
As I catch the lady, I notice a very strong smell of feces, and I feel something warm on my hands, arms and shoulders...
My fellow heroes come in behind me, and as the lights are turned on, my worst fears are instantly realized.
Yes, I caught the poor old lady with a good old bear hung football catch, but I was also covered in the lady's feces.
As I look at her, she has feces smeared all over her arms and hands... (and even her face!)
Had a 20 something yo male present to ED with CP for 3 days. Come to find out, he had gotten high on meth and put his sons sippy cup in his bum. If I didn't see it (In the OR of course) I never would have believed it. The OBS hall outside of the OR was packed!:chuckle
Specializes in LTC, CPR instructor, First aid instructor..
had a 20 something yo male present to ed with cp for 3 days. come to find out, he had gotten high on meth and put his sons sippy cup in his bum. if i didn't see it (in the or of course) i never would have believed it. the obs hall outside of the or was packed!:chuckle
ohhh here's a yucky one......I and a fellow nurse was giving a female patient a bath and changing linens. The patient was on the vent and really sedated so me and the nurse was talking about what we did the weekend before. Well, we go to trun the patient and her cather got wrapped up in the linen and pulled out and landed right in the front pocket of my scrubs.....gross!! I took that as the perfect example of the need to pay more attention to the patient and less to the conversation.
Well, I have to tell you... I am not a nurse yet, and haven't even started school yet... but I now know that I am making the right decision to leave my current career & go into nursing. Apparently, I was born for it. I've been reading these stories while I eat my lunch. They are completely cracking me up (except for the few sad ones), and not one of them made me put down my fork! Either I was meant to be a nurse, or I have a really serious food addiction! :-) Keep the stories coming!
Kathy
I know what you mean... although i do have 11yrs CNA under my belt not one of these stories have made me gag... i may have turned up my nose at a few coz some of it is just gross... but no technicolor twist here! :chuckle
Pt. went home s/p bka, returned a few days later with a post-op wound infection. Turns out pt. was letting her dog lick the wound, pt. thought this was the height of hilarity-weirdo!
One night in my alzheimers unit, we had one lady who was swearing up and down there was a fire in her room and that the stove needed to be turned off.... (she even threw water on the ceiling) so we kind of got her settled down. and we hear the woman in the next room just jabbering away.... we go in there and she has dug herself out, xlarge bm turds on the floor. her explainaition was "I am cooking lunch" hummmmmm cooking/stove???? very interesting!:rotfl:
Pt. went home s/p bka, returned a few days later with a post-op wound infection. Turns out pt. was letting her dog lick the wound, pt. thought this was the height of hilarity-weirdo!
Specializes in LTC, CPR instructor, First aid instructor..
Pt. went home s/p bka, returned a few days later with a post-op wound infection. Turns out pt. was letting her dog lick the wound, pt. thought this was the height of hilarity-weirdo!
Probably because she believed the old wives tale that the saliva of a dog's tongue has (I forgot the number) anti-infective saliva glands, and is why they lick their wounds to heal them.
Specializes in LTC, CPR instructor, First aid instructor..
One night in my alzheimers unit, we had one lady who was swearing up and down there was a fire in her room and that the stove needed to be turned off.... (she even threw water on the ceiling) so we kind of got her settled down. and we hear the woman in the next room just jabbering away.... we go in there and she has dug herself out, xlarge bm turds on the floor. her explainaition was "I am cooking lunch" hummmmmm cooking/stove???? very interesting!:rotfl:
Yes it is gross. Yuck, yuck, yuck. I got the full picture in technicolor!!!!!!!!!!!
A nice littel old man in a wheel chair waved at one of my co-workers (a pretty littel 18 year-old, fresh out of high school sugar and spice type of girl). He said "honey come over here please" as she bent down to talk to him. He moved the blanket covering his legs and SPLAT! he ejaculated right in her face and mouth. I never saw her again and thus my nursing career beagn...........
THATS THE WORST THING I EVER HEARD IN MY LIFEE!!!!!
ang75
67 Posts
Had a 20 something yo male present to ED with CP for 3 days. Come to find out, he had gotten high on meth and put his sons sippy cup in his bum. If I didn't see it (In the OR of course) I never would have believed it. The OBS hall outside of the OR was packed!:chuckle