Stupid things that nurses say - page 14

I'm going to pick on myself for a moment. I have to admit that sometimes I blurt things out without truly thinking about it. Today I said something ( without thinking) to a patient that was purely... Read More

  1. Visit  cree0165 profile page
    2
    While doing a straight cath on an elderly gentleman:

    Me: Ok. It'll be in and out before you know it.

    Him: Sigh. Well, you sure ain't the first woman who's told me that!
    valliloves and floridanurse1983 like this.
  2. Visit  ceejRN profile page
    6
    I love threads like these!

    I was discharging a male patient the day after he had sinus surgery and was reading him all the directions on the discharge papers. He was in a hurry to leave so I was trying to get through them pretty quick. When I came to the part where it says don't blow your nose until the doctor tells you it's ok, I said "don't blow your doctor.." I immediately stopped and turned bright red. The patient did too and we both had a good laugh. And I was able to correctly spit out that sentence. But I could not believe I said that!
  3. Visit  Postpartum RN profile page
    4
    Quote from calinurse11
    Geeze, I say and do stupid things all the time. I have posted this story before, so some may remember...I was getting a check up at my doctors (who works with me mind you) and he was listening to my heart, shirt pulled up and all. He tells me to hold my breasts, so obviously I think he can't hear my PMI clearly so I move them around, he looks and says to hold my breasts again so I am there.....fondling myself and I say "can you not hear? Do you want them up, down, to the side?" He says "no, hold your BREATH....I thought I was going to croak right then and there.
    Omg I am ROTFL!!!!!! As I lay here reading this in bed I cannot stop laughing, my husband woke up and asked what's wrong with me!
    Hahahahahaha that is the best one I read so far!!!
    midazoslam, valliloves, jtmarcy12, and 1 other like this.
  4. Visit  Christy1019 profile page
    4
    Quote from ceejRN
    I love threads like these!

    I was discharging a male patient the day after he had sinus surgery and was reading him all the directions on the discharge papers. He was in a hurry to leave so I was trying to get through them pretty quick. When I came to the part where it says don't blow your nose until the doctor tells you it's ok, I said "don't blow your doctor.." I immediately stopped and turned bright red. The patient did too and we both had a good laugh. And I was able to correctly spit out that sentence. But I could not believe I said that!
    My new favorite post!!! Bahaha
    brownbook, valliloves, nrsang97, and 1 other like this.
  5. Visit  floridanurse1983 profile page
    3
    "You don't want the pt to go down on you in the hallway" in front of a class of 15 cna students I was teaching. I thought no one noticed for a second but unfortunately it was only a delayed reaction before the whole class fell apart.

    I had to excuse myself when a student jokingly asked "So just in the hallway is bad?!"
    Last edit by floridanurse1983 on Jun 6 : Reason: Grammar
    midazoslam, valliloves, and Christy1019 like this.
  6. Visit  floridanurse1983 profile page
    2
    Another one
    Male coworker: that's a really big watch."

    Me: "I like big ones"

    Ugh
    midazoslam and valliloves like this.
  7. Visit  valliloves profile page
    0
    I'm not a nurse yet so I hope you don't mind if I chime in. I had a patient once whom I completely forgot had cancer and was going into hospice. I was very busy that day and extremely tired. No excuse, but when he was leaving with his granddaughter, I said, "Thanks for allowing me to take care of you today. It was nice meeting you. I hope you get better very soon!"


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