Funny things you have said but wish you didn't - page 25

A few years ago, I was on the phone with a person from the local lumber company. having in mind to ask if they had any tar paper. But instead, toilet paper slipped out. That remark started the... Read More

  1. by   elizabells
    Is it weird that that balls story is like the sweetest thing I've ever heard? Such a good nurse you are!
  2. by   rn4ever?
    I did the discharge of a patient in our unit because the charge nurse told me that the patient's (Alicia) ride would be there at any minute. As Alicia was bidding goodbye to the other patients in our unit, an elderly gentleman came to pick her up. From the nurses' station, our charge nurse yells: "Alicia, c'mon, your ride is her, your father is here to pick you up." The guy suddenly uttered to her: "Do I look old enough to be Alicia's father? Hey, by the way, I'm her fianc! Our charge nurse turned beet red and struggled for words to say. She wanted to save face and tried to explain things, but each time she tries to explain things the fianc says: "Don't think that by saying that you could make things better." Everyone who heard it rolled out in laughter!
  3. by   Jessiedog
    Quote from caringnursenj
    I did the discharge of a patient in our unit because the charge nurse told me that the patient's (Alicia) ride would be there at any minute. As Alicia was bidding goodbye to the other patients in our unit, an elderly gentleman came to pick her up. From the nurses' station, our charge nurse yells: "Alicia, c'mon, your ride is her, your father is here to pick you up." The guy suddenly uttered to her: "Do I look old enough to be Alicia's father? Hey, by the way, I'm her fianc! Our charge nurse turned beet red and struggled for words to say. She wanted to save face and tried to explain things, but each time she tries to explain things the fianc says: "Don't think that by saying that you could make things better." Everyone who heard it rolled out in laughter!
    Know where ya comin' from, sista! I've been caught that way SOOOO many times! The only time I WASN'T caught was because us nurses were all warned at shift change, that the 30 year-old lady helping feed and change Mr Smith (80 & dense CVA with broken hip) was NOT his daughter, but his partner! :stone I went away from that shift with a WHOLE LOT of mental images I'd rather not have! Apparently they'd been lovers for a few years before his stroke and fracture. But still........
  4. by   lpnstudentin2010
    Quote from Jessiedog
    Know where ya comin' from, sista! I've been caught that way SOOOO many times! The only time I WASN'T caught was because us nurses were all warned at shift change, that the 30 year-old lady helping feed and change Mr Smith (80 & dense CVA with broken hip) was NOT his daughter, but his partner! :stone I went away from that shift with a WHOLE LOT of mental images I'd rather not have! Apparently they'd been lovers for a few years before his stroke and fracture. But still........

    That was nice that they warned you.
  5. by   Jessiedog
    Quote from JustaPatient
    That was nice that they warned you.
    Amen!! Would have been extremely embarrassing otherwise. She was a lovely lady, too, and just loved to be able to care for her partner. We got to be quite good friends as he was a long-term patient, and she was there nearly every day. I wish some of our other patients had families half as dedicated.
  6. by   grace90
    I was in a pt's room and had just finished assessing him and as I was leaving, I poked my head in and said something along the lines of "Oh, BTW, often times during the night I poke my head in and check on my patients, without knocking, just to make sure they're alive." Boy did I feel like *&^%! "I mean, to make sure they're alright". The pt, a rather sick GI pt with a very flat affect, just looked at me. Crud!
  7. by   lpnstudentin2010
    Quote from grace90
    I was in a pt's room and had just finished assessing him and as I was leaving, I poked my head in and said something along the lines of "Oh, BTW, often times during the night I poke my head in and check on my patients, without knocking, just to make sure they're alive." Boy did I feel like *&^%! "I mean, to make sure they're alright". The pt, a rather sick GI pt with a very flat affect, just looked at me. Crud!
    Personally as a patient I would probably laugh it off, though I can see why others would be like what the hell did you just say.
  8. by   dina77
    When i was a pupil nurse back in the late 70's i wouldn't have said boo to a goose, and lacked confidence. I hadn't been on the wards long when i was talking to an older male colleague. I can't really remember what we were talking about but i said the word 'orgasm' instead of 'organisms' and soon noticed when i saw the look on his face.:imbar I wanted the ground to open up as i was there trying to impress and talk intelligently to this older, very experinced male nurse!
    What made it worse is that i just ignored it instead of laughing and admiting my mistake.
    Last edit by dina77 on Jun 10, '08
  9. by   talaxandra
    When I was young and considerably more enthusiastic than I am now, I did a somewhat controversial self-actualisation program, to the delight of my parents (who'd done and paid for me), disgust of my siblings (who thought it would encourage our weirdo folks), and concern of a few bystanders. I was trying to reassure one of them that it as benign, that "though some people think it's a cult" they were mistaken. Only I somehow pronounced "cult" minus the 'l' with an 'n' it doesn't have. Never before, never again, and I'm red just remembering.I once said that people thought a self-actualising program I was doing
  10. by   meintheUSA
    Quote from Farkinott
    I once worked in a nursing home and one of my colleagues was congratulating oneof the relatives saying "It is so nice to see how much you care for you mother by coming every day and feeding her lunch" he said " Mother? She's my wife!"
    Nuff said!

    NEVER assume the relationship is what it seems!
    Your not alone. I (last month in a LTC setting) ) asked a gentleman pushing another gentleman how his BROTHER was doing since being discharged from the hospital. Now I am the "Fathers" caregiver!!!! :imbar :spin::imbar
  11. by   ink10300
    :spin:
    Quote from HyperRNRachel
    During my first clinical I had to feed a blind man. Nervously I lifted the cover off his trayand told him..." HMMMM it LOOKS good" I felt really stupid, especially when he said, " I wish I knew it looked good." He was laughing about it, but I felt really really bad.
    I know how you feel. I was a telephonic nurse case manager for work comp. A new file was transferred to me and I already knew- it was written on my intake that she was blind- but after concluding our phone conversation, I automatically asked her if she had a pen and paper handy to write down my number.

    On another event, we had an inservice. The company had one person there but was waiting on the main speaker to arrive.
    I received a phone call from the late arriving speaker who says that she had a devastating family emergency and she is sending a replacement. She went on to say a few things about the horrible emergency.
    I couldn't tell you what- I was busy multi-tasking and typing and said, oh, that's great.
    I felt bad when I realized that she was still speaking about the accident. I was talking about her replacement...
  12. by   lpnstudentin2010
    Quote from ink10300
    :spin:


    On another event, we had an inservice. The company had one person there but was waiting on the main speaker to arrive.
    I received a phone call from the late arriving speaker who says that she had a devastating family emergency and she is sending a replacement. She went on to say a few things about the horrible emergency.
    I couldn't tell you what- I was busy multi-tasking and typing and said, oh, that's great.
    I felt bad when I realized that she was still speaking about the accident. I was talking about her replacement...

    ouch!!!!
  13. by   NiteNurz
    This thread is so funny! I remember years ago when I worked as a bank teller we would give dog biscuits to the drive up customers who had their dogs in the car and lollipops to the kids in the car. One nite after the sun went down and it was hard to see who all was in the car, I said the the customer "would you like a dog biscuit for your dog?" She sound REALLY mad when she responded "Thats my daughter!!" and drove away. We couldn't stop laughing.

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