Funniest real orders you have seen in a chart? - page 36

To start things off, the best and funniest order I have seen on a chart, was in the discharge instructions for a trauma patient. It read simply Darwin Consult and was signed by the... Read More

  1. by   ArmyKitten
    Quote from psalm
    Was that a misprint, a doc nearing 105? What hospital is this in?
    That was sarcasm
  2. by   EmmaG
    Quote from ArmyKitten
    We have a staff doc that is nearing 105 and now finds his daily joy in writing orders in the most creative manor possible. His latest creation is writing "squeezies to legs" instead of SCDs. This is the same doc that draws a smiley face on the steristrips of every surgical patient he has. Last week I noticed that not only did he draw a smiley face on a lap appy pt, but he made a speech bubble on the steristrip next to it with the word "ouch" written in. Oh my.

    :lol_hitti
    Good for him

    Sounds like he's having fun.
  3. by   Diary/Dairy
    My Mom found another good one the other night on the ER report sheet.....
    "Fractured Penis"
    OOOOOUUUUCCHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    It makes me hurt and I am a girl!!!!
  4. by   fronkey bean
    I had a doc write for me to "obtain picture of pts wife and place at bedside." Unfortunately he forgot to leave me a key to the guys house so I couldn't comply.
    Same doc wrote an order for pt to rreceive a b'day cake and for "nurses to sing Happy Birthday". Which I did in all my off key glory!

    Not an order, but a funny story from the floor. A coworker had an 83 year old pt. who was a little confused at times. The guy called him down to the room one day and asked him "where's my daddy". My CW tried to reorient him to reality and told him that his dad was dead. The poor guy got so upset that his 'daddy" had died he almost cried. He finally calmed down and went to sleep. Imagine how bad my CW felt when the next day the guy's dad came in to visit!
  5. by   Natkat
    Quote from fronkey bean
    I had a doc write for me to "obtain picture of pts wife and place at bedside." Unfortunately he forgot to leave me a key to the guys house so I couldn't comply.
    Same doc wrote an order for pt to rreceive a b'day cake and for "nurses to sing Happy Birthday". Which I did in all my off key glory!

    Not an order, but a funny story from the floor. A coworker had an 83 year old pt. who was a little confused at times. The guy called him down to the room one day and asked him "where's my daddy". My CW tried to reorient him to reality and told him that his dad was dead. The poor guy got so upset that his 'daddy" had died he almost cried. He finally calmed down and went to sleep. Imagine how bad my CW felt when the next day the guy's dad came in to visit!
    Oh my God! That is too funny.

    It is a cautionary tale to be sure.......never assume!
  6. by   TigerGalLE
    Lovenox 750mg IV daily
    Levaquin 40mg SQ daily

    I knew what he meant... but I made him clarify it anyways.. haha... he was embarrassed.. esp since I had already shown everybody in the station
  7. by   TrudyRN
    Quote from debbyed
    Hey, better a "shot"q6hr than withdrawl. Withdrawl can get really ugly and Depending on the patients age and severity of his medical problems it could be fatal.

    We have several frequent flyer alcoholics that come into the ED for various reasons. Well our standard of care states that no one can leave the ER with a Blood Etoh of >100 unless a "responsible"adult comes to sign the patient out. On several of our "older"alcoholics who routinely show up with Blood Etoh's of <500, the Er doctors write specific orders to discharge patient when he can state his social security number backwards. We don't do repeat ETOH levels on them for fear that if we actually kept them until their Etoh level was >100, they'd start seeing pink elephants, and then we'd all be in trouble.
    I think you mean that the desired level was < 100 (less than 100).

    And > 500 would mean greater than 500. So I think you mean less than 500 (< 500).
  8. by   lpnstudentin2010
    not on a chart but an order given to me by an orthapedic resident when i injured my tailbone..."Patient has been advised to refrain from activities while laying on the floor" I got this order because in my choir at school we lie on the floor to do breathing excercises. I showed that to my professor before I realized what else it could imply.
  9. by   vcn1980
    From a consultant psychiatrist on Friday, "ah yes, give this chap a stat dose of 300mg librium and 10 demazepam for sleep"

    I pointed out that he probably meant 30mg librium and got the SHO to prescribe 10 diazepam rather than temazepam (if figured he meant one or the other).

    Also worked with an anaethstatist who'd prescribe O2 til perky.

    Had to stop a student looking for 50mg levothyroxine too, it had been on the chart for a week!
  10. by   Always Learning, RN
    Quote from Used and abused
    How about a double amputee:
    "ambulate qid 150 feet"
    We recently had a similar order when I was in clinical.

    Patient: 1 day post op double BKA
    Order: Ambulate in hallway bid

    Another time, order stated: "Do not disturb patient between 9pm and 7am -- only enter room if called!" This is a critical care floor - So if he codes, does the night shift just wait 'til morning?

    As a student, I only had to avoid room for one hour after clinical began, but RN's on floor despised the order stating they were "NOT a maid or room service!" I Agree!
  11. by   mcexclusive
    A new Grad took a phone order for Gaviscon. Obviously she did not clarify and repeat with the physician because in the orders were written, "Gas is gone, 15ml prn" We all got a good laugh, including the new grad.

  12. by   grace90
    On rehab floor this morning I had a diabetic pt who was NPO for a cardiac stress test and her blood sugar was 70. She was asymptomatic at the present time.

    We have standing orders for giving an amp of D50 if the blood sugar is below 40 or they are really symptomatic (followed by a phone call to a doc) but since she wasn't I called the internal med doc on call and got an order for "a small cup of orange juice x1". And I did write it as an order to cover myself so no one could come back at me and say "why did you give her orange juice, she was NPO?".
  13. by   nursejoy1
    Saw this today-

    Vick's Vapo Rub to R foot BID x 90 days

    Supposed to work for Athelete's Foot.

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