Why is it MEN seem to get along better in this field than WOMEN??!!! - page 13

Hello this was brought up to me so now I'm sharing it with you all, I had a new R.N. nurse come to me in tears because another R.N. treated and talked to her very badly when she asked her basic... Read More

  1. by   bluesky
    Quote from Kyriaka
    In this field, your coworkers won't trust you if you are aloof and removed.
    __________
    Is it trust..or is it that you are not with the "group"??

    That's fine. I have no problem with that.

    I suppose it was just like in high school. I never was part of the "group".

    I just think that mixing work with socialization causes problems. I think that most men would agree with this. And I think most women would not.

    Not right or wrong. Just causes problems
    Nope. Trust is important because it promotes good teamwork. Never made a comment about conformism. Again, the connection between socializing and gender... not substantiated in my experience. In fact, my old ER was ruled by a socially brilliant MALE tech who had everyone wrapped around his pinky with his charm while secretly hating most of those who worshiped him. A true player.
  2. by   robinrdrn
    Quote from lisadlpn2brn
    Hello this was brought up to me so now I'm sharing it with you all, I had a new R.N. nurse come to me in tears because another R.N. treated and talked to her very badly when she asked her basic questions, and in the midst of her tears she stated her brother was also a new nurse and doctors even help him when he had a problems she didn't seem to understand why women wouldn't like to help women, I have also seem to witness in this field men do seem to get along alot better than women, you will find a few nurses that will help you when in need but that is a very few, I don't know if it's due to the shortage everybody is overworked or underpaid, but we are killing the younger generation of nurses who do try and probaly will oneday make good nurses if they can handle the stressful enviroment any suggestions?
    :angryfire

    Look, I'm speaking from years of experience......not just mine, but my mother who is an 80 year old nurse......."The field won't get any better until more MEN get into it, just like the TEACHERS......once the Men were in, (the field) they unionized and got better pay." Women on the other hand, offer to do more with less rather than stick up for themselves....or work as a team. Look at history.........what profession works as hard as we do.....without pay and benefits as good as auto workers? Do you think any group of men would put up with the ***** most women do in the work arena? NO!
    Oh yeah, my son is a nurse, and do ya want to know what he said after about a week on the floor with female nurses....."Mom, all women do is B****, B****, B****!" I told my son, "Welcome to the world of working with women!" But, rather than continue to complain about or say, I would never want my kids to choose the "NURSING" profession (how hypocitical) I have encouraged my children to work in it! Nurses who waste time and valuable energy on "clicky" behavior need to go and work at an auto factory and see how far it gets them.....and frankly those individuals or nurses that promote that type of behavior are dragging our profession down. Spoken from 3 generations of nurses.......looking to change things. I say lets create a movement to "exile the clicks!" Lets think of a snappy saying and put it on a nursing pin we all so like to wear.

    Enough said,

  3. by   Kyriaka
    [QUOTE=bluesky]Nope. Trust is important because it promotes good teamwork.
    ______________
    What does non work related chit chat have to do with teamwork? Team work is just that. WORK. Working as a team.

    Just because someone doesnt want to socialize apart from that or socialize about non related things does not make them any less capable.
  4. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    The only things that work (my home floor) knows about me is the day i graduate and my last day on my home floor. I do not discuss anything else. My life outside of work is just that, outside, and that's my choice to want to keep it that way. I'm there to do a job, and if that makes me boring for focusing only on that, so be it, i'm not there for the entertainment.
  5. by   Kyriaka
    [QUOTE=bluesky]Nope. Trust is important because it promotes good teamwork. Never made a comment about conformism.
    ________________
    So...let me get this straight. You dont trust someone to do their job if they wont chit chat about non related work things??

    And they are not "part of the team" if they dont chit chat about non related work things??

    When I hit the door that is it. I am at work. Period.

    But just because I am that way did not make me less of a Real Estate Broker, or a Manager, or a Regional Customer Care Manager for ATT. And it wont make me any less of a nurse. Just the opposite. I was able to focus on my job, get the job done, and get bonus and rewards and respect from upper managment. Because I was working overtime with no extra pay (co workers just hate that )just so I could be the best that I could be. And so I could learn all that I could learn.
  6. by   Alnamvet
    If women would just get in touch with their masculine side, the work place would be a better place to be...LMAO
  7. by   susanna
    I think this thread has helped me catch on to something: Honestly, in my lifetime of working, ONLY MEN have ever been cool with me not chitchatting about my personal life/revealing personal stuff at work and still being able to work as a team.

    Its really been the women in my experience who really try to pry in to personal matters and "chitchat" in order to feel comfortable and team-like. I've had many occasions where women try to pry in to my personal life and become uncomfortable when they realize that I won't share info about myself. Then, I've had really, really bad occasions where women have started openly hating, discriminating against, and trying to break me emotionally me for not being their feminine buddies and not opening up.
    And, they don't do this to the males!!! Males can be aloof and girls don't attack them : ( And, I had one occasion where this really paranoid, loud, nosy girl did this to me and NO ONE helped me. Everyone just kind of looked the other way.

    I don't know. Am I generalizing too much from my own experiences or is this something males do to each other (discriminate for not opening up as a buddy)too in the abscense of female co-workers?
  8. by   Alnamvet
    Am I generalizing too much from my own experiences or is this something males do to each other (discriminate for not opening up as a buddy)too in the abscense of female co-workers?[/QUOTE]


    Not at all...you are right on target
  9. by   bbear
    There is one particularly interesting observation I have made regarding the differences between how men often relate to one another in the workplace vs. how women often relate to one another. When men become competitive with one another they seem to do so while observing certain unspoken rules of the game. It's as though there is some invisible line they know better than to cross. A code among rivals, so to speak. But when women become competitive--man they take off the gloves and it's fight to the death or not at all. I have on several occasions found myself dumbfounded by the extent to which one woman is willing to go to win the upper hand. Truly scary stuff.

    *Disclaimer--this is a very general observation and in no way was this observation meant to apply to all women.
  10. by   bbear
    Come to think of it, maybe that wasn't at work after all. Maybe it was my wife I'm thinking about. LOL:uhoh21:
  11. by   bluesky
    First of all, in my book, socializing consists pf relating to other people in a friendly manner, not "chitchatting" about my private life. If someone that I am working with only speaks for 2 minutes or less at a time, I am less likely to go out of my way to ask them if they need help than if we are on a friendly basis. Seems rather intuitive to me.

    Prior to switching to the medical profession, I was an electrical engineer. Electrical engineering in particular is male dominated. I went to work everyday in an office full of men. Well, let me tell you, they "chit-chated" just as much as anyone else... about their cars, their children, their wives, sports, what they caught fishing last week. THAT is socializing. Now if you feel that socialzing is detrimental to worklife, that is your prerogative. I would not particularly enjoy working on a unit managed by someone with that philosophy but otherwise, live and let live.

    To make these erroneous associations between gender and behavior, however, is a sad testimony to how women in nursing are still being agents of their own marginalization.
  12. by   bluesky
    Quote from bbear
    There is one particularly interesting observation I have made regarding the differences between how men often relate to one another in the workplace vs. how women often relate to one another. When men become competitive with one another they seem to do so while observing certain unspoken rules of the game. It's as though there is some invisible line they know better than to cross. A code among rivals, so to speak. But when women become competitive--man they take off the gloves and it's fight to the death or not at all. I have on several occasions found myself dumbfounded by the extent to which one woman is willing to go to win the upper hand. Truly scary stuff.

    *Disclaimer--this is a very general observation and in no way was this observation meant to apply to all women.
    Examples of male- dominated professions where individuals routinely "cross the line and fight to the death"; Business, Government Bureaucracy, Politics, War. I mean look at how low some of these negative adds for political candidates have gone...
  13. by   teeituptom
    Quote from Alnamvet
    If women would just get in touch with their masculine side, the work place would be a better place to be...LMAO

    Personally I like women, and I certainly wouldnt want them to get in touch with their masculine side. That wouldnt appeal to me at all, I love them the way they are.

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