Why dont' nurses help each other?!

Nurses Relations

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All I have ever wanted to do with my life since the age of 7 was to be a nurse. I accomplished this goal and took a position in the ER. The experienced nurses warned me..."ER nurses eat their young". This was a concept that I came to understand quickly. It is actually one of the biggest reasons that I have not been active as an RN for over a year now. Don't get me wrong, there were the FEW that made the biggest difference in my life because they took the time to teach.

I am sort of jaded by this experience though, I thought that nursing is supposed to be about caring and helping others...at least that's why I became a nurse. It seems that more experienced nurses do not want to take less experienced nurses under their wing. Instead, they become easily frustrated unwilling to explain or flat out tell you that basically you're an idiot for not knowing something. I am still on the fence as to whether or not I will return for a significant amount of time or just long enough to go back to school. Any thoughts or feelings on this topic?

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
i agree, nursing is not any more 'unwelcoming' than other professions -- every hung around with lawyers? but we're characterized by more mythology -- 'angels of mercy', nurturers, etc. -- than other jobs. this also contributes to more burnout than just about any other career except social work; we just expect too much of ourselves.

nurses are just people -- like lawyers, engineers and coal miners. it's the "angels of mercy" myth that seems to make so many feel as though nurses should somehow be above human pettiness. it seems that it's not enough that we "take care of" patients, their families, our families, we're also expected to be "nurturing" to students and new employees, many of whom are just looking for examples of "nurses eating their young". if someone is looking for examples, they'll find them. self fulfilling prophecy and all. and then we hear that nurses are mean, nasty, catty backstabbers and it's all because we're predominately women.

i'm sorry, but if you hate women you're going to find catty and backstabbing females, and if you are looking for slights everywhere you go, you're going to find them where they don't exist. on the other hand, if you start a new job looking to give and to contribute expecting to like your co-workers, that's probably what you'll find as well.

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Specializes in Med/Surg.
Hi Nurse-lou, I had to take a moment to reread thread title and it said, why don't nurses help each other? and not "To the experienced nurse.". Err, you may want to get your bearings right....and then we will discuss:)

She was using your other thread to point out your consistent attitude toward more experienced nurses, which you have also demonstrated on THIS thread, and in this POST. I realize you are doing this to be snarky, but you know what, it's old now. Really.

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Hi Nurse-lou, I had to take a moment to reread thread title and it said, why don't nurses help each other? and not "To the experienced nurse.". Err, you may want to get your bearings right....and then we will discuss:)

Katie5 you don't need to be rude to prove a point.

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Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.
QUOTE=RhiaRN75;4186724]. . .When I found my way to my little ER, I had a coworker similiar to the one you describe. She was a hella nurse. She intimidated me greatly in the beginning- after one hellacious weekend we were friends. What a woman! She's the one who once slid a chart towards me and said "Here, sign this with me. When we go to court I'll buy you lunch." I just loved her.

I love nurses like that! Since I am now old, I guess I should call them old old school??? Dunno, but they were some of the most interesting characters I've ever known once you get past the exterior. Many of them do not wear their emotions on their sleeve, this is true. But once you earn their respect and loyalty, you cannot ask for a more staunch ally.

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Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.
QUOTE=RNMLIS;4182977I was punched in the nose by a scared confused old man - not only did the manager know there was a potential - it was not addressed appropriatly -excused - brushed off

The horizontal violence in LTC....

SHAME!

We may all disagree about how much more civil, professional, or has the best intellectual sparring skills, but this is unacceptable, and it seems like no one either protected you or acknowledged that you were injured. I guess, from what you have said you are not in nursing anymore, but even if the assault didn't rise to the level of battery due to the confused mental state of the man you should have been immediately treated. That is not the norm.

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Specializes in Med-Surg Nursing.
Hi Nurse-lou, I had to take a moment to reread thread title and it said, why don't nurses help each other? and not "To the experienced nurse.". Err, you may want to get your bearings right....and then we will discuss

Erm, Katie, I know EXACTLY what thread I am posting on. My point is that you are rude to all of us 'experienced nurses'. It was highly evident in your other thread and you bring your attitude to this thread too!

Drop the attitude honey! It won't help you in your career!

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Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.

From the sound of it being all that in a glorified office job teaches people to think they have awesome people skills and superior intelligence, when in reality they sound rude and condescending. I don't think there's a cure for that.

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Katie5 you don't need to be rude to prove a point.

Rude? More like sarcastic!

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Erm, Katie, I know EXACTLY what thread I am posting on. My point is that you are rude to all of us 'experienced nurses'. It was highly evident in your other thread and you bring your attitude to this thread too!

Drop the attitude honey! It won't help you in your career!

Perhaps I'm "rude" to the know-it-all version of experienced nurses. But thanks for the advice sweetie, I;ll remember it.

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
perhaps i'm "rude" to the know-it-all version of experienced nurses. but thanks for the advice sweetie, i;ll remember it.

being rude to anyone who is in a position to evaluate your performance of your job (ie nurses more experienced or whom have been on that unit longer than you) is not going to help your career at all. but perhaps all you care about is being "right." you have the perfect right to behave in as uninformed and unintelligent manner as you choose. those experienced nurse you're judging have the perfect right to evaluate you based on that -- and it's not going to do your performance review any good.

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Specializes in LTC Rehab Med/Surg.

There was a time when I could slow down, explain, answer questions..... Gradually, over the years, nurses are expected to do more and more. I simply don't have time on any given day to carry someone else's load. I can answer questions, and advise, even help with a very sick pt. But most nights it takes all my time and attention to keep my head above water. Helping someone else just means we'll both drown.

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Specializes in Hospice, ONC, Tele, Med Surg, Endo/Output.
Erm, Katie, I know EXACTLY what thread I am posting on. My point is that you are rude to all of us 'experienced nurses'. It was highly evident in your other thread and you bring your attitude to this thread too!

Drop the attitude honey! It won't help you in your career!

relax, you guys, play nice.

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