Refusing food offered by patients

Guttercat, ASN, RN · Sep 29, 2013

A friend of mine was once given "brownies" by a patient's family member. She had to leave work sick (stoned).

amoLucia · Sep 29, 2013

A friend of mine was once given "brownies" by a patient's family member. She had to leave work sick (stoned).

The Alice B. Toklas cookies recipe is still around!!! Old reliable! :roflmao:

ArtClassRN, ADN, RN · Sep 30, 2013

All to often patients very sweetly offer me some food, sometimes from their tray that they didn't touch or sometimes some home baked "specialty" made just for me. How do you tactfully refuse food offered by patients? Especially in cultures where refusing food is a "sin"...

I like to be really creative and say, "No, thank you."

Bortaz, MSN, RN · Sep 30, 2013

I think, if you're just going to throw it away, you should just refuse it. Wasting their time and money (of which they might not have much to spare) is more rude, imo, than refusing their gifts.

Kooky Korky, BSN, RN · Sep 30, 2013

Say thank you but you are dieting. Or thank you and take it, you can toss it away later or give it to someone at the Desk.

ComeTogether, LPN · Sep 30, 2013

If its off of their tray I just tell them I'm not allowed, because I'm not. If they made something I just happily accept it and usually happily eat it! I had a patient bring me 24 cupcakes on my birthday...sooo sweet!! I shared, of course :-)

Sometimes it just makes them so happy to be able to give a little something back, I'd never deny them that.

ComeTogether, LPN · Sep 30, 2013

Years ago when I worked in LTC, there was a resident who was very social and often went to plays and outings. She always had some goodies because she got out a lot, and always wanted to share. Anyway, she brought back a container of welches juices (the kind that would probably cost $1.50 each in a vending machine). She practically forced these on us. We told her no thanks, but she insisted on giving the 3 of us each a juice. We accepted finally. I put mine by my computer.
About 2 hours later, she came yelling that someone stole 3 of her juices and she wanted to report it. The other 2 who drank their juices felt horrible as we were trying to refresh her memory that she offered these to us, but she adamently denied it. I handed her my untouched juice and she called us thieves.
I never take anything from a resident, patient, or family member. I don't make up an excuse, or feel bad about it. I just say "no thanks".

Was she confused? I just assume everyone knows not to take anything from a confused person, but yeah I guess this could be a real issue, especially if you don't know them well enough to know if they're confused. (In the case of a CNA, say)

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Sep 30, 2013

I think, if you're just going to throw it away, you should just refuse it. Wasting their time and money (of which they might not have much to spare) is more rude, imo, than refusing their gifts.

Problems arise when I'm dealing with a patient or family member who becomes personally offended when I refuse food, especially when they put so much effort into preparing it.

These people wish to feel as if they are 'giving back' to the staff who has worked so hard to care for them/their loved ones, so I smile, accept the food graciously and thank them. However, I will toss food without any regrets if the person appears uncleanly or slovenly.

I will eat home-cooked baked items (cookies, cakes, muffins, etc.) from families who appear clean and well groomed. I also eat prepackaged food gifts such as granola bars and bags of chips. I also eat store-bought cakes and donuts that families purchase from local bakeries.

wgempel · Sep 30, 2013

I just say "Oh, Thank you. That's very nice." and then don't take any.

merlee · Sep 30, 2013

In some facilities eating something off of a patient's tray, regardless of the circumstances, can be cause for dismissal.

Frankly, I would only eat something that was store-bought and individually wrapped.

'Thank you for the offer, but not today. Maybe the next time.'

Many places now have 'no food' policies. The LTC facility where my MIL is one of those, but my offer of a pizza party for the entire staff on their yearly inservice day was much appreciated. It wasn't very expensive, and everyone who came in could partake.

Flare, ASN, BSN · Sep 30, 2013

take what's offered, tell them you have to eat in the break room, toss it unless it's pre packaged and sealed. I would NEVER eat in a patient's room anyway :barf02:

Elvish, BSN, DNP, RN, NP · Sep 30, 2013

Totally depends on the setting. I used to work in a community health center where we had a high # of migrant farmworkers. Often they'd bring us stuff they'd picked but that the farmer couldn't use as their way of saying thank you. Scored some nice strawberries, cantaloupes, cukes, and sweet potatoes that way. (For some reason, they never brought us the tobacco leaves....) Some of the people we knew were excellent cooks, and they'd bring us homemade tortillas or tamales, and we'd eat them and enjoy them. Once, however, a patient brought us some pupusas (which I love, usually) that smelled rancid, like they'd been sitting out for a few days. We accepted them, said thank you, and tossed them later. None of us wanted to be barfing a few hours down the road.

I work in mother/ baby now, and most patients have food aplenty, either commercial or homemade. A lot of them offer food. I usually take it and eat it. I've gotten Moroccan semolina soup, Mexican head tacos (I know, it sounds PG-13, but they were good), Egyptian almond cookies, and a Lebanese family invited me to sit down during Ramadan and break the fast with them.....'died and gone to heaven' does not describe that food well enough. Not to mention the chocolate bars, pizza, and pastries that families bring in from restaurants. I figure if the patient is eating it and not keeling over, I am not likely to either. Of course there is always the possibility that they have some immunity I don't have, but so far so good. Very rarely the food is of sketchy origin, and in that case I say, "I'm kind of busy right now, but may I take it to eat later?" They always say sure, and I take it in the break room and what happens after no one knows. I do make sure to thank them for being so thoughtful.

Again....totally depends on who/what/when.