New nurse/ bad colleague relations

Nurses Relations

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So, I just graduated nursing school in May. I passed by boards and was offered an internship! Wonderful! I have an amazing preceptor who is willing to teach me everything she knows. The problem is that a handful of nurses on my new unit do not like my preceptor for whatever reason. I am being lumped into this situation with her. I have introduced myself to these nurses " Hi, I'm Colleen and I'm the new RN Intern". This was the response I received "Ok". I got the hint. Ok they're not going to make this easy, they are not very friendly. Well, maybe it will take them awhile to warm up to me. My preceptor used this opportunity to tell me of the troubles she has with this group of nurses. They have shunned her and she doesn't even sit at the nursing desk. We work nights so she takes the cow into another room and does her charting. Well, I decided to not go off of the things she was telling me and to let my own experiences with these nurses be my view of them. I asked my preceptor a question about a heart rhythm and that's when the trouble started. Well, the three nurses were standing at the desk with the doctor. My preceptor walks by and then I walk behind her. One of the nurses blatantly rolls her eyes as we walk by. They all three start laughing and the doctor as well. Now, I was upset at this. I am learning and there was nothing right about this situation. Later, I politely asked to speak to one of the nurses that was making the faces privately. I recanted my view of the situation to her and asked if she was mocking/laughing at me and if she was in my view it wasn't very professional and I did not appreciate it. She just looked at me and said no and stalked off. OK. You said you weren't mocking me so I took her at her word. I then tried another approach. Kill them with kindness. Hello how are you today? Nothing, that seemed unusual to me. Well you can guess that as I walk by I hear them obviously talking about me. I don't get it. I did nothing to these ladies. I have decided to ignore the behavior for the rest of my time. I'm just worried if I get hired on after my internship that these ladies are going to make my life miserable. I don't want them to think it is ok to treat me this way. I don't talk about them even to my preceptor so I have no worries on that end. I do when I get home though...LOL. Any advice? My manager did come up to me after about a week and said I was doing a great job and would I want a position after my internship.

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Specializes in ICU.

I'm sorry to hear that you're having troubles at work. It doesn't make it any easier, especially for the new and wanting to learn nurse. Kill them with kindness, and remember that what matters more than their judgments is what kind of nurse you are going to be. Never stoop to their level; continue to gain that valuable experience and seek out other who will give you the support that you need. If your nurse manager is supportive, ask for another preceptor if possible citing that your learning style is different than the way your current preceptor teaches.

Best of luck!

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Specializes in Nursing Professional Development.
I'm sorry to hear that you're having troubles at work. It doesn't make it any easier, especially for the new and wanting to learn nurse. Kill them with kindness, and remember that what matters more than their judgments is what kind of nurse you are going to be. Never stoop to their level; continue to gain that valuable experience and seek out other who will give you the support that you need. If your nurse manager is supportive, ask for another preceptor if possible citing that your learning style is different than the way your current preceptor teaches.

Best of luck!

If you think switching preceptors that might be worth a try ... but please don't lie and blame it on the fact that your preceptor isn't a good teacher for someone with your particular learning style. That poor preceptor has enough problems without you "piling on" and making her look bad in front of the boss. Be honest with the manager and tell her the truth -- that some of the other staff members bully this preceptor and it is starting to have an effect on you.

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Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

I am sorry for your troubles at work, but I have to say, onebiggiantparagraph is very hard to read, if you get my drift. Please, break it down more so I can better read what you post.

Other than that, I wish you well. Try to tough it out. Sometimes, things get better as people get to know you and you are sincere.

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llg is right - be truthful about the situation.

Being the new person on the block is a challenge; even when people are nice. You feel out of sync.

(Not all nurses are rude. Some are just downright busy).

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Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.
If you think switching preceptors that might be worth a try ... but please don't lie and blame it on the fact that your preceptor isn't a good teacher for someone with your particular learning style. That poor preceptor has enough problems without you "piling on" and making her look bad in front of the boss. Be honest with the manager and tell her the truth -- that some of the other staff members bully this preceptor and it is starting to have an effect on you.

Well said. I feel sorry for that poor nurse. Please don't make her life at work harder than it already is. Why would you do that? You said she's an "amazing preceptor who is willing to teach you everything she knows."

If you're going to lay blame, make sure you blame the right people, not this poor preceptor who has been kind to you.

I agree with SimlingBlueEyes...I almost skipped reading this because of the format.

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Specializes in MICU, SICU, CICU.

Throwing your preceptor under the bus, as lv3677 suggested, just to be in with the cool kids, would be unwise.

Everyone knows that the weakest links are the biggest bullies.

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Sorry about the format! You're definitely right it's a little hard to read that way! I was trying to figure out how to edit the post but can't figure out how!

I definitely don't want to throw my preceptor under the bus. I like her and I have no interest in changing preceptors. I feel like I'm not really in a position to be complaining to my manager about others either. I'm trying to get hired on after my internship is over.

I probably will just suck it up and deal with it. I have had several other nurses come to me and say the same thing about these three nurses. So it is not an unknown issue and I have been told they have been reported before and nothing has been done. I will finish out my internship and decide later if it is something I will be willing to deal with full-time. I think though that there will always be a bad seed anywhere I go.

I like the unit and have no problems other than this. I was looking more for insight into how to deal with this situation. But, it seems that ignoring them seems to be the way to go! Many thanks!

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This might be the only job offer you get, so don't be quick to cross the possibility off your list. These people seem to want to make it difficult for you, they probably do that to everyone new. Don't let them separate you from your paycheck. Ignore as much as possible, attempt to be helpful and work with them as professionals should when feasible, and you may find that in about a year's time the bad behavior has all but become extinguished. Any one of them who continues to treat you in a bad way by that time is truly toxic and you should guard yourself around that individual as a matter of precaution. Good luck.

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Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.

Just keep being the best nurse you can be, keep being civil to everyone and be the consummate professional. The Three Stooges don't have to register on your radar. You did do the right thing to confront the one about her mocking behaviour. She scuttled off in a hurry. So if you see anything blatant like eye-rolling you can calmly ask if they meant to come across that way; watch them scurry back under their rock.

Above all, never take their crap personally. This is about what they are, not who you are. You don't need to stoop to their level, or "win them over". At some point they will try to be your new best friends. Keep being civil but always keep them at arm's length; they've already shown their true colours.

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I'm envisioning 3 crows sitting on a fence cackling while everyone else is working.

I don't kill anyone with kindness, they'll just see you as trying to win them over and I don't think you will get the response you're looking for.

I would stand up for my preceptor though, I wouldn't stand by and let them talk **** on her. I'd probably say something like I'd never thought I'd see people I thought I would be looking up to being so crappy to a member of their own team.

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Specializes in MICU, SICU, CICU.

Eventually this petty behavior is going to affect patient care, if it hasn't already.

This is an ugly situation and frankly, I think you should apply to other units and your preceptor should transfer out of there as soon as you finish your internship. It is not worth it.

Let them work short staffed.

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