How Rude!!!

HoJo · Oct 3, 2003

I wouldn't have taken it personally. I doubt he meant to insult you or any nurses.
What I am hearing is a dad who is bursting with pride in his daughter, one who recognizes her special and unique abilities and capabilities, and who was attempting to convey to you
that she could just as easily become an M.D.
My guess is that he is working and sacrificing and supporting her and someone has told him that for another "2 or 3 years, she could be a doctor. !"
In the rankings of prestigious careers, doctor outranks scientists, astronauts, pilots, ad infinitum.....nurses fall between butchers and newspaper delivery men.
My guess is , he was clumsily trying to communicate to you that his little girl................"could be a doctor."
Remember, communication is not most mens' strong points.
I don't see malicious intent, rudeness, or a put-down in anything he said.
Sleep on it, and give it a second look .
If you commented to him, I am sure he would be shocked to
hear that you felt he was condemning nurses.

I totally agree with you, passing thru.

That's just his way of communicating, that's life, he's a farmer that's just how it is. He's not insulting anyone, try not overanalzye. And if you disagreed with him then why didn't you say somthing right there? I mean if you find somthing sooo insulting then speak up and be assertive instead of ananlyzing and reanalzying a simple thing on the internet, you aren't going to do much for changing the public view on nursing if you don't say anything other than whine about it on a forum board.

rn 2b lnc · Oct 3, 2003

I don't know, I think that if/when he is a patient, or has someone in a health care setting, he would likely be one of those patients/family members from :devil: . Nothing would ever be good enough. IMO

CseMgr1, ASN, RN · Oct 3, 2003

"I just don't think being a nurse is very impressive. Having MD behind you name says a lot more. I can not believe I have to put her through college just to be a nurse."

Arrogant SOB.....

Isabel Lobes · Oct 3, 2003

You guys still deal with less insult here in your part of the world. Where I work the nursing is a taboo and majority of the people cannot of even think of their children going into nursing as it is bad as being a prostitute and nurse are considered in my part of the world as prostitute.

So imagine what we have to deal with, men look at you the way they look at them, this may be a shock for the developed countries but we have to put up with this every day.

I come from a family of nurses and have married in a family where nurses have always been respected, thank God for it.

Thank God you were not practicing here.

passing thru · Oct 3, 2003

The operative words in his conversation were....""I can't believe I am putting her through college..............""

He was clipping and thinking about the hair cut and rattling on.

He was angling for a compliment and also trying to get a

conversation going on the trials and tribulations and sacrifices of putting a child thru college. Obviously a whole new experience for him.

He was focused on the hair cutting , not on his words.

If the 2 of you had been sitting at the table having a cup of coffee, then ;

it would be viewed in a different light. Then he would be/could be held accountable, and you could follow up with..."wow, do you know what you just said?? how that sounds?? You know I am a nurse...."

As it was , his mind was probably on 3-4 things, .......it was just clumsy conversation.

Thanks for the compliment. I do see the glass half full.

I like to give people "second chances.."

And, the benefit of the doubt.

I don't look for slurs, and rarely perceive one.

Most people are preoccupied - - or they trust us to know what they are saying - - what they mean.

Communication is easy between old friends.... I can say something stupid, but my friends know me well enough to

know what I mean....and not bother me with clarifications......

I like to extend that acceptance to others.

sbic56, BSN, RN · Oct 3, 2003

It would be easy to be insulted, but I agree with passing thru. Besides, wouldn't most of us rather see our kid become a doctor over becoming a nurse? Or an accountant over a book keeper? Or a lawyer over a paralegal?

eltrip · Oct 3, 2003

Um, I don't don't think he was the stylist...he's a farmer.

IMO, I think it was more of one of those moments where he wasn't even thinking about WHO he was speaking to at the moment, just his feelings about it...you know, the "open mouth, insert foot" thing that happens to most of us from time to time.

I probably would have looked him in the eye & said, "I beg your pardon?" It usually causes the speaker to rethink what he/she said & realize their blunder.

Katnip, RN · Oct 3, 2003

I don't even believe he was thinking about his words as being insulting. It sounds as though he's not very well educated himself, and he's proud as can be about his daughter's intenlligence, and the fact that she probably can go as far as she wants.

He's like the vast majority of people out there who don't understand the requirements that nurses need to practice these days.

This would have been a great opportunity to gently explain just how important nurses are to the health and well-being of the general public, and how these days, they work in collaboration with physicians as well as other healthcare providers.

JenNJFLCA · Oct 3, 2003

I think his comment was uncalled for, but try not to let it get to you. I've had people say to me, "Why don't you go to PA school instead?" Arg! Some people just don't understand the difference between nurses and doctors.

NursePru · Oct 3, 2003

Hope you didn't tip him for that haircut

katscan · Oct 3, 2003

I do not think the guy was rude at all. Let's face it folks, doctors command more respect immediately than nurses-especially with our multiple ways of getting our RN. He is being practical-physicians earn more too for the investment of the college years over a lifetime than nurses. Physicians go at least 8 years to college. Some nurses have only 2 years. My parents invested 5 years on my BSN and when I got out the garbage men in my community earned more than I did. I had to work crazy hours for very low pay. In no way do I regret my nursing degree, I am just being practical. You have to WANT to be a nurse, as the financial renumeration is very poor for most of us and it is almost impossible to raise a family on what we make-let alone be physically present for our children. The man is proud of his daughter,no doubt and wants the best quality of life for her. Physicians on the whole have a much better quality of life after work than nurses, I feel. He was just wishing that his daughter is not going to face what we all discuss on this board...

JUSTYSMOM · Oct 3, 2003

How old is this man? It must be a generation thing. My dad who is 68, felt the same way until my mom was admitted into ICU with pseudopnemonia (s?) and eventually passed on.

It was only then that he saw that the nurses (not the doctors) were the ones with compassion, patience, good judgement, committment and HARD WORK. The experience really opened his heart and his eyes.

Quote:

"Wait until he needs a nurse"

That says it all.

LOVE to all you nurses!!!!!!!!