The dumbest things you've heard from a provider

  1. 10
    The other afternoon an OB resident came by to check in with a patient, the OB doc seemed very perplexed as to why the patient was crying. "I don't know why she would be crying, that seems strange..."

    Because postpartum women NEVER cry. THERE'S NO CRYING IN CHILDBIRTH RECOVERY!!

    So what are some of the things a provider has said that just make you wonder?
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  5. 13
    An OB resident asked one of my coworkers if she always wore gloves for cervical exams. Umm, yeah, sport, I do, because I'm not their sexual partner.

    Another resident was very upset that the baby was crowning because, "I haven't done a nitrazine yet!!"

    An intern (who turned into an awesome doctor) was very frustrated one night because he wasn't sure he would know when the patient was complete, and told me that he thought he'd just leave his hand in there so he wouldn't have to keep putting on gloves. Yeah, I don't think the patient will enjoy your hand up there for the next 15 minutes or so.

    A resident who was HUGE (played college football) and who could barely squeeze into a pair of size 8 1/2 sterile gloves told a patient that a cervical check couldn't hurt that bad. I offered to get the other huge doc on the unit to do a prostate check on him to see if it would give him some perspective.


    A med student dropped a baby despite warnings from the nurse. His response to her irate comments afterwards? "I don't know why you're being so mean to me!"
    DizzyLizzyNurse, Altra, sharpeimom, and 10 others like this.
  6. 5
    A med student dropped a baby despite warnings from the nurse. His response to her irate comments afterwards? "I don't know why you're being so mean to me!"
    Oh oh... this nurse meanie has switched from eating young nurses to chowing down on med students.... in a professional setting, of course!!
    Last edit by JustBeachyNurse on Jul 22, '13
    monkeybug, DizzyLizzyNurse, Fiona59, and 2 others like this.
  7. 2
    Quote from monkeybug

    A med student dropped a baby despite warnings from the nurse. His response to her irate comments afterwards? "I don't know why you're being so mean to me!"
    How far was the baby dropped? Was any injury involved? Was the student disciplined?
    DizzyLizzyNurse and sapphire18 like this.
  8. 7
    Internal medicine resident: "How do you know if the patient has scleral edema?"

    My coworker and I: "Ummm...you look in their eyes..."
  9. 1
    A doc I worked for wrote a script for oral phenergan for a pt who had been vomiting until I reminded him of the PR route.

    As a pt, I was in the ER with hyperemesis gravidarum (extreme morning sickness with excessive vomiting and dehydration). It was my 3rd ER visit in under a month, and just 8 days after a 4-day hospital admit. The ER doc ordered one bag of fluids and IV zofran (despite me being on oral zofran, phenergan, and reglam for a week). After that single bag of fluids was done, he gave me a can of 7-Up and told me to drink it and I could leave when I was done. I said I was still feeling bad and one bag wasn't enough, he said the 7-Up would settle my stomach. He was right outside my curtain when I threw the 7-Up all over the floor. Yep, I was admitted again and started on a zofran subcu pump and home health services. Stupid doctor.
    JustMe54 likes this.
  10. 7
    Colleague to a new mother holding her baby - "I'd like to book you in for an induction".
  11. 4
    MD order, on MAR: "If drowsy, give her coffee or tea". Same MD, for a homosexual, sexually inappropriate resident. (verbally inappropriate with staff/residents/visitors/children, anyone with ears): "Consult with Baptist minister".
  12. 3
    Quote from bluegeegoo2
    MD order, on MAR: "If drowsy, give her coffee or tea". Same MD, for a homosexual, sexually inappropriate resident. (verbally inappropriate with staff/residents/visitors/children, anyone with ears): "Consult with Baptist minister".
    Just wondering...why must the minister be Baptist, and what exactly is said minister suppose to do about this problem?
    DizzyLizzyNurse, Fiona59, and nrsang97 like this.
  13. 4
    Quote from kbrn2002

    Just wondering...why must the minister be Baptist, and what exactly is said minister suppose to do about this problem?
    I think that's the point of why this is dumb.


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