Dear British "Hoaxed" Nurse: - page 2

Dearest British "Hoaxed" Nurse (Nurse Saldanha): As an American Nurse I know our scope may be different, but we are both "nurses" none-the-less. There is more that is in-common, than is... Read More

  1. Visit  rngolfer53 profile page
    5
    Quote from ThePrincessBride
    I'm thinking there is a bit more to this story that doesn't meet the eye. The hospital stood by this nurse AND the royals insisted that she would not be retaliated...so I think she was already mentally unstable to begin with.
    Really, that is just speculation. One need not be mentally unstable to be entirely overwhelmed by unexpected, world-wide attention.

    Even assuming, for the sake of argument that this nurse was fragile, how does this change the situation? If one is going to devise and execute a hoax, shouldn't one think out in advance the likely possible consequences. I'm not suggesting that the media-types could have predicted suicide, but it was likely that innocent people, which includes the Duchess (?. I'm not up on my royalty titles) would be distressed by their self-serving hoax.

    An ordinary prank is expected to provide a good laugh, including to the "victim." I doubt very much if the hoaxsters in this case had any such intention to the royals or the hospital staff. It has the odor instead of a particularly self-centered teenager.

    My $.02 anyway.
    sapphire18, havehope, twinkletoes53, and 2 others like this.
  2. Get the hottest topics every week!

    Subscribe to our free Nursing Insights newsletter.

  3. Visit  rngolfer53 profile page
    1
    Quote from Not_A_Hat_Person
    The Paparazzi aren't totally blameless, but Diana and Dodi Fayed might have lived if their chauffeur hadn't been legally drunk.
    There's a comedian who wonders what did Diana expect? Read the Old Testament. When's the last time anything good happened to an Egyptian?
    BostonTerrierLoverRN likes this.
  4. Visit  mclennan profile page
    7
    I am heartbroken over this whole story, and the comments that disgust me the most are those that speculate other potential reasons why she took her life.

    1. It doesn't matter. She's gone. Her family and co workers and patients and friends are suffering. How does accusation and speculation help ANYONE at this point? How is armchair psychology gonna help bring her back or fix anything?

    2. You have NO IDEA what her reasons were. NONE. You didn't feel her feelings or think her thoughts. You have NO IDEA if SHE thought suicide was "worth it." Whatever her reasons, just the prank or existing instability - for ANYONE to question or declare if its "worth it" is crass at worst, and disrespectful at best. Maybe ending the pain seemed "worth it" to her at the time. It was her decision and her pain and her despair. It's no one's place to decide the "worth" of any decision like this. It sucks and it's tragic and sad and devastating. The least we can do is respect whatever reason brought her to that point, even if we don't feel "comfortable" with that reason. I'm sure she would appreciate us learning from this rather than seeing it as an opportunity to assign "worth" to her decision. I know everyone reacts differently to suicide and I understand often people don't know what to say, but come on.

    I speak as someone who survived a very real attempt. I wanted to scream at anyone who told me "it's not worth it." That is not for you to decide. Suicide is the ultimate selfish act but that is exactly why you cannot designate its "worth." Think about it.

    I wholeheartedly agree that media is largely responsible - the producers AND consumers who create the market demand.

    I hope she is in an eternally peaceful place.
    Armygirl7, havehope, june42, and 4 others like this.
  5. Visit  gonzo1 profile page
    3
    Your tribute is beautifully written. Hopefully this terrible tragedy will have some good come of it. I know that I take the privacy stuff very serious and if I thought I had done something wrong with the Queen I would be scared ******** too. I mean, it's not just some regular patient, but the family of the Queen of England. And privacy violations are very serious, so I can see where this could have caused a really big problem. Worrying if you are going to get fired, etc.
    What I find interesting is that there is no discussion of the "nurse" that the call was passed to, and she supposedly is the one that gave out the information to the DJs. I'd love to know if she still has a job. If she has had a gag order placed on her by the hospital, etc. For all we know she got in a lot of trouble and that may be why this nurse took her own life.
    At the end of the day, it is a terrible tragedy and we all need to take care of each other.
  6. Visit  nursel56 profile page
    3
    Beautiful tribute, BTL. I pray that her family is granted a measure of peace and understanding that is above and beyond what we imperfect humans are able to confer, even with the best intentions.
  7. Visit  LadysSolo profile page
    6
    In my state she would have been "thrown under the bus" by the hospital. She was humiliated worldwide. How could she have ever gone anywhere without finger-pointing and comments? We who do not protect our own are all to blame, if you've ever pointed a finger at a colleague for a med error, charting error, etc. Think about it......
  8. Visit  ThePrincessBride profile page
    3
    I have attempted suicide before so I am well aware of what goes through a person's mind when they think about suicide and rarely is any of it rational. A mentally stable person wouldn't have taken their life over a stupid joke, especially when their job wasn't on the line time begin with.Yes it is sad and I feel for her and her family but it is silly to say that a mentally stable person would hang themselves over a stupid prank like this. And this someone who suffers from mental illness more than you could imagine.
    Quote from mclennan
    I am heartbroken over this whole story, and the comments that disgust me the most are those that speculate other potential reasons why she took her life. 1. It doesn't matter. She's gone. Her family and co workers and patients and friends are suffering. How does accusation and speculation help ANYONE at this point? How is armchair psychology gonna help bring her back or fix anything?2. You have NO IDEA what her reasons were. NONE. You didn't feel her feelings or think her thoughts. You have NO IDEA if SHE thought suicide was "worth it." Whatever her reasons, just the prank or existing instability - for ANYONE to question or declare if its "worth it" is crass at worst, and disrespectful at best. Maybe ending the pain seemed "worth it" to her at the time. It was her decision and her pain and her despair. It's no one's place to decide the "worth" of any decision like this. It sucks and it's tragic and sad and devastating. The least we can do is respect whatever reason brought her to that point, even if we don't feel "comfortable" with that reason. I'm sure she would appreciate us learning from this rather than seeing it as an opportunity to assign "worth" to her decision. I know everyone reacts differently to suicide and I understand often people don't know what to say, but come on. I speak as someone who survived a very real attempt. I wanted to scream at anyone who told me "it's not worth it." That is not for you to decide. Suicide is the ultimate selfish act but that is exactly why you cannot designate its "worth." Think about it. I wholeheartedly agree that media is largely responsible - the producers AND consumers who create the market demand. I hope she is in an eternally peaceful place.
  9. Visit  ThePrincessBride profile page
    4
    And no suicide isn't selfish at all.
  10. Visit  KaraThrace profile page
    4
    In my very humble and subjective opinion, the facility failed this nurse.
    Security measures should have been in place such that "just anyone" could never have called directly to the staff caring for a princess, period.
  11. Visit  delawaremalenurse profile page
    3
    Quote from ThePrincessBride
    I'm thinking there is a bit more to this story that doesn't meet the eye. The hospital stood by this nurse AND the royals insisted that she would not be retaliated...so I think she was already mentally unstable to begin with.
    I think there's more to it as well but from the other side of the coin...I find it very hard to believe that the hospital wasn't going to make an example out of her for violating policy (when has hospital admin not take a "guilty before proven innoncent" approach) in a very embarrassing situation.

    I know they're saying in public that they had no intention of taking any disciplinary action but....puhleeze!!!!!!!!
  12. Visit  ThePrincessBride profile page
    1
    I see what you are saying but from my understanding, the Duchess did not wish for any disciplinary action to take place against either of the nurses prior to the suicide.
    Quote from delawaremalenurse
    I think there's more to it as well but from the other side of the coin...I find it very hard to believe that the hospital wasn't going to make an example out of her for violating policy (when has hospital admin not take a "guilty before proven innoncent" approach) in a very embarrassing situation.I know they're saying in public that they had no intention of taking any disciplinary action but....puhleeze!!!!!!!!
    BostonTerrierLoverRN likes this.
  13. Visit  PRICHARILLAisMISSED profile page
    4
    This is a tragedy. This woman is no longer with us over what amounted to nothing more than a prank. My heart goes out to Mrs Saldanha's husband, 2 children and of course her extended family and friends who I'm sure are all devastated by this. It is so sad how such an apparently minor thing as a 5 minute phone call can devastate so many lives.

    It is only human to want to identify those responsible and make them pay for their act. But when doing so, be must be mindful to not let emotions get in the way, and be as rational as possible. I say this because as I type this post, there are several videos and articles on google showing how the DJ's who conducted the prank call are being vilified, and how their boss should fire them. I wonder however, how many of these people who "Demand justice" for Mrs Saldahna were also laughing along to the hoax before Mrs Saldahna chose to take her life (If in fact she did commit suicide. According to the 5 articles I've just read and watched, while her cause of death is not classified as "suspicious" at this time, suicide is not the final verdict. She could very well have been attacked by a misguided UK patriot for all we know at this point, or even have succumbed to a medical condition. It simply has not yet been determined). I would wager the answer is most if not all. And if that is the case, I would also go so far as to say that those people are (though possibly to a slightly lesser extent) as responsible for this tragic situation as the DJ's themselves.

    Maybe it is too soon to point this out, but it must not be forgotten that, when it all comes down to it, if this was a suicide (and it likely is but is not confirmed to be), it was Mrs Saldanha who made the final decision to go through with it. YES, she was going through a terrible ordeal that she did not ask to be put in the middle of. I get that. But it was her choice. To not put the final responsibility on her would be no different than not putting the final responsibility on someone who chose to take the life of a child while they were going through a terrible ordeal. It really is the same thing, and we are all accountable for the DIRECT result of our actions and decisions. And please understand I did not post this to incite anger. I did so to bring light to certain areas of this case that many would subconsciously (and consciously) "overlook."

    In summation. This is a terrible tragedy that I truly wish did not happen. I mean that as much as any does save those who actually knew Mrs Saldanha. Yet while I acknowledge that it WAS the 2 DJ's that started this butterfly effect, they truly had no way of knowing that the death of a wonderful woman would be the result.
  14. Visit  08RNGrad profile page
    1
    I too have wondered about the nurse who actually gave the information to the caller. We will most likely never know what really caused her to take her own life. From the surface, it seems tragic that she would take her own life over something like this. Her guilt must have been awful. From reports I've seen, her husband said she had not shared the incident. Perhaps if she had talked about it, he could have helped her cope. Such a tragic situation all around; for the nurse, her family, and the pranksters..imagine that guilt.
    BostonTerrierLoverRN likes this.


Nursing Jobs in every specialty and state. Visit today and find your dream job.

A Big Thank You To Our Sponsors
Top