Dating Patients

doobiedo, RN · Jan 8, 2005

I met and married one of my patients. Our relationship did not start until he was discharged and he made the first call. Been married for 21 years. Sorry but I do not see the big deal. I had patients try to set me up with their sons prior to that...which I politely declined however if you are discrete and don't take advantage of a situation I am not sure I see what is wrong.

When is the patient no longer a patient....my opinion is as soon as that patient leaves the hospital....so that person is 'another person on the street' (so to speak) that you just happen to meet.

TexasNS · Jan 20, 2005

I am sure this happens more often than we think.

Prior to nursing I had a career as a Correctional Officer in a state prison. Even in that feild Nurses would have relationships with their patients. Yes the patients were inmates!!!!

At least once a month we watched a nurse get escorted off of the grounds in handcuffs for having a relationship with a "patient" It is a felony

z's playa · Jan 20, 2005

I am sure this happens more often than we think.
Prior to nursing I had a career as a Correctional Officer in a state prison. Even in that feild Nurses would have relationships with their patients. Yes the patients were inmates!!!!
At least once a month we watched a nurse get escorted off of the grounds in handcuffs for having a relationship with a "patient" It is a felony

It's a felony? Holey moley.

TexasNS · Jan 20, 2005

As of 1999 in the state of Texas anyhow.

z's playa · Jan 20, 2005

As of 1999 in the state of Texas anyhow.

Tough state. If they're not killing people they're locking up nurses? :rolleyes:

I'll never get it. People of Texas are great ....it's the laws that need to be revamped. :)

luvnsg · Jan 20, 2005

I always thought that if you get caught being romantically involved with a patient your license may be in jeopardy.....according to the New york State disciplinary board...Does any one know?

z's playa · Jan 20, 2005

I know that here in Canada you go before a disciplinary commitee and yes it is possible to lose it however a suspension is the more likely outcome.

hypnotic_nurse · Jan 20, 2005

When I first started out in psych the psychiatrist we worked with told us that it was inappropriate and you *NEVER* had a relationship with a patient -- even as friends -- outside of work, due to the high abuse potential (by and for both caregiver AND patient) with emotionally fragile people.

While this is most important for psychiatrists and counselors, it also holds true for social workers and nurses.

While never is a very strong word, I think "almost never" is probably appropriate, at least where psychiatric inpatients are concerned...I know several people who could have avoided quite a bit of heartbreak (not to mention lawsuits) if they had paid attention to this. I also know a few others for whom it worked out OK...but I think I'd prefer err on the side of caution.

edeverges · Jan 21, 2005

well i need advise too. i personally have not had a relationship with a client/patient, but i am learning more and more about a coworkker who has a relationship with an ex-client at a different facility. her friend recently lost his job. she is trying to do the best for the relationship, i think. she works part time with me, but recently a full time position came open at the facility she met her live-in. she told me she wrote a letter to the director, because he will have the final decision about weather or not she is able return to work at the location she was fired from due to having a relationship with someone who was receiving treatment at the facility at the time their relationship started. she has not worked there for a year. i had been taught not to be involved with patient for at least a year from caring for them. now the part time position has gone even further to state that employees must never have a relationship with clients. the older i get the more i feel that this policy is an infringement onmy rights, to associate with others. however i have certainly complied. any way any feed back would be appreciated.

Ruby Vee, BSN · Jan 21, 2005

my ex claims to have slept with a patient's wife while the patient was in icu. (she hadn't had sex in a long time due to her husband's medical condition. my ex claims he was doing her a favor.) he also says he slept with a patient while she was in the hospital, with a physical therapist in the pt department and with the occaisional family member of a patient. his first wife, a pt (don't know if she was the same pt or not) ran off with a patient! they were both married at the time they took off together. in my experience, it causes nothing but pain for everyone else involved. and besides that, it's creepy!

ruby (who has never slept with a patient, a patient's family member or anyone on hospital property. i did, however, marry a coworker.)

Papercutz · Jan 21, 2005

my ex claims to have slept with a patient's wife while the patient was in icu. (she hadn't had sex in a long time due to her husband's medical condition. my ex claims he was doing her a favor.) he also says he slept with a patient while she was in the hospital, with a physical therapist in the pt department and with the occaisional family member of a patient. his first wife, a pt (don't know if she was the same pt or not) ran off with a patient! they were both married at the time they took off together. in my experience, it causes nothing but pain for everyone else involved. and besides that, it's creepy!
ruby (who has never slept with a patient, a patient's family member or anyone on hospital property. i did, however, marry a coworker.)

hey ruby keep your ex away from this pt lol!!:chuckle

reading through this thread has been enlightening. personally i don't recall anything being taught about this in pt school, and i haven't read any policy against this at my facility (but i work in a nursing home so unless your name is annanicole smith i dont think many staff/patients are hooking up!!).

however, i keep hearing about this hot grandson of one of my patients and i'm wondering if i liked him could we date? i remember a patient's son asking out our nurse practitioner and she kept saying no because it 'wasnt proper'.

kenni · Jan 21, 2005

we find love in all kinds of weird places, especially when you're not looking for it. personally, I probably wouldn't date someone after reading his complete medical hx. there's probably some stuff in there I don't need to know:uhoh21: ! and I certainly wouldn't want to date my POC, knowing he's read MY complete medical hx:imbar . I thought there were rules in place for that! if you REALLY think you've found your love in a hospital or dr's office consider meeting that person outside the workplace or off the clock, but don't "hook up" or exchange numbers while providing care.