My Breaking Point!

  1. Hi there, I recently had a run in (again) with being called into the office to discuss why I, the nurse, walked into a patients room. Really, that is exactly how it was stated. I am the nurse on the floor, by the way, the only nurse here at that time and I was handing out meds, the aide on the floor went to my super. and said I was going behind her back, I about fell out of my chair. I explained that I am a nurse and I am doing my job and I was giving that particular person meds required. So, really, is this crazy to even be asked this? I ended up crying in the office, I am so over aides continually, same ones, going into the office and saying I talk to them as if I am over them etc., and the way I come across is a problem. I totally believe I am in the right here. I have had some past issues but yet, I have overcome them and am laid back as my employer requested of me. Now I am really truly feeling like I am being harrassed by the caregivers. See, before me was a nurse that was everyone's friend, and didn't care what they did, no longer employed there, here I am and I have to ask the aides for things, and what I usually will say is something like this, "when you get a chance could you go get ice water for ....." or "if you need help let me know"...this is what I say, and am polite. I am being shoved under the bus and have no idea how to deal with this because management is the ones that even asked why I was entering a room...okay, so I am a nurse right, so my mgmt tells me to leave my aides alone and not get in their way, well, okay, and I am told if I need something from them write it down and we'll (mgmt) will discuss it the next day...okay, this only works if nothing is needed that night....hello? these people ask for things on a continual basis so that is kinda hard to do too. Am I just being overly sensitive to this or what? I ended up being so fed up with lies about me, aides saying I said somethings when nothings were said, or an aide taking it the wrong way because they were not in the conversation. What to do? I need your help other LPN's!
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    About tn nurse

    Joined: May '12; Posts: 9; Likes: 2
    LPN; from US
    Specialty: 3 year(s) of experience


  3. by   Emilynn09
    Have you really thought about the situation? Is there any way that maybe your tone is coming off wrong? Since more than one person is having the same complaint perhaps there is a tone about your voice they are picking up on?

    I know sometimes CNAs are very overworked. The ones I work with are running around constantly. For something like water- if it's just one patient, I get it. It doesn't take that long. If I see a foley that needs to be emptied, and I'm in the room, I do it. If I have time, I change patients. The way I look at it is team work, an usually I have no issue getting a CNA to help me on the really crazy days where I can't do the little extras.

    I can't say for sure what's going on in your situation since I don't work with you, and I've only heard your side, but maybe consider the situation again and evaluate what's going on. Having the CNAs against you is NEVER a good thing. As a nurse, you NEED them.
  4. by   BrandonLPN
    ^what she said.

    I know people are going to disagree with me, but the CNAs you work with should never fell like you're "the boss", they should feel like you're all on a team together and tha you got their backs. NEVER walk out of a room and ask an aide to empty a foley or fetch a glass of water. If you just do it yourself they will have tons more respect for you. Also, you should help them with their work whenever you can. When I worked 11-7, I would do some of the get-ups every single morning.
    And that included washing them, changing briefs, getting them dressed, up in w/c, all that. Now that I work 3-11 I don't have quite as much time, but I still manage to put a resident or two down to bed most nights. Help with showers,
    answer call lights, help pass supper trays. If you do this every night, on the nights you're too busy to do so they will understand. But if you NEVER do these thing, or only once in a blue moon, they will label you as lazy and stuck up.

    Also don't be afraid to have a sense of humor. No one likes working with someone who is overly prim or serious. If you need an aide to go clean a "code brown", try being humorous about it. I once told my aides I don't make beds very well cause that's "women's work", they think that's a hoot, and tease me about it all the time. Don't be afraid to be informal. This is LTC, not the ICU.

    Trust me, all this really works. When I ask an aide to do something, they are eager to help. When a coworker of mine, known for having "charge nursitis" and siting behind the desk all night makes the same request, she is met with eye rolling and muttered comments.....
    Last edit by BrandonLPN on Jul 26, '12
  5. by   itsmejuli
    I was in a similar situation at my last job. I'm not going into details, let's just say I was bullied and suffered mobbing behavior that was not addressed by management. I wish I'd left sooner.

    So, do yourself a favor and look for another job asap.
  6. by   BrandonLPN
    But if multiple people are making the same complaint, maybe you need to adjust your behavior. Many nurses are to quick to play the "victim" card....
  7. by   Elladora
    Quote from BrandonLPN
    ^what she said.

    I know people are going to disagree with me, but the CNAs you work with should never fell like you're "the boss", they should feel like you're all on a team together and tha you got their backs. NEVER walk out of a room and ask an aide to empty a foley or fetch a glass of water. If you just do it yourself they will have tons more respect for you.
  8. by   jadelpn
    I had to read your post twice. "going behind my back" is an issue. That you are questioned why you are going into a patient's room is also an issue. I can only assume that the aide is upset as he/she feels you are checking up on his/her and her work? In any event, I would definetely ask management how it is that they prefer you to "come across". Be firm in your goal that you are there to make sure everyone gets their meds on time. And as the only licensed person in the facility, that people are being properly cared for. I would be clear to the aides that the LAST thing on your "to do" list is "checking up on them" or "going behine their back" however, they know what needs to be done, so please do it.....aides are your best allies, and you couldn't do it without them. It is a balance for sure.
  9. by   tn nurse
    Thank you all for responding to this venting that I have done. I have not told all of the story I thought but from reading I neglected to say, that when I was humourous at one time, the aide complained I was being rude, then when I am serious, the same aide said, laugh, so I feel that I am just being pushed around into what they "the aides" want me to feel, say, act or do. I do my job, allow them space to do theirs and never do I go behind them, that is just nuts, I have enough to do alone. For the remaining comments, its not everyone going into the bosses office, it is just like 2-3 of them, so I guess, I meant to say, just that. For what I was told to do from now on is leave the aides alone, let them do their work, me do mine and kinda disappear from them when not busy. So I do this these days. I have decided to pick up slack on a floor that is not 100% staffed so I can help those patients more, but won't relay this to anyone. I just leave the small talk alone, don't engage in any conversations unless need be and leave the aides to doing their work and me doing mine. Yes, I am working on my tone of voice, but never ever thought my tone was coming across inappropriate since I pleasantly ask aides to do whatever is needed when I am busy. I help out when need by, but recently was told from boss to just let them do their job, so I leave them alone now. I am working on my tone of voice and guess what, since I have been told that I have said things that were not ever and I mean ever said, I now carry a recorder with me at all times and when on the floor, I turn it on. I am sorry I have had to do this, but I am only protecting myself and maybe if anything comes back again, I have proof or maybe I will in fact hear what they think I am doing, but regardless, this way there must come a win-win situation. I have always helped the aides, in fact, I usually help them when they need extra help, but after all the complaining and it coming from not reliable sources, I have decided to take a backseat and let them do their job, me do mine and leave it all at that. Thanks for allowing me to vent, and I am actually working on mgmt of others. I graduated from school last year and what they don't teach you is how to manage others as an LPN on the floor, because most places of others doing the managing.....but I am the super where I work on my shift. So I am learning and I have even asked my aides to please understand that I am not perfect and I am trying my best to supervise, but I guess that went in one ear out the other......
  10. by   xoemmylouox
    Well I have to say it may take a long time for their attitudes about you to change. Continue to offer assistance when possible. CYA and write them up when needed. You need to be fair.
  11. by   morte
    Frankly, part of your job IS 'going behind' them, every once and a while. This is part of your supervisor work. How is anyone going to eval them, if no one sees their work? I think you need a new job, last week. Good luck
  12. by   rosey35cna
    I'm a nac and have to say that its crazy that you can't ask the aides to do anything. Imo that is what im there for is to help the nurse. What happens in an emergancy and you have to take charge?
  13. by   BrandonLPN
    Quote from morte
    Frankly, part of your job IS 'going behind' them, every once and a while. This is part of your supervisor work. How is anyone going to eval them, if no one sees their work? I think you need a new job, last week. Good luck
    Trust me, aides don't respect nurses who go behind them and inspect their work. If an aide is doing a lousy job, it's obvious without having to go behind them. My aides trust me because I treat them as equal partners. They can count on me to have their backs. When I ask them to do something they do it BECAUSE I don't treat them like children who have to be followed up on. These are grown-a** women who've been doing this job years before I became a nurse. They know what they're doing.
  14. by   Dafabb
    I am a 35 yr LVN and have worked 6/8 yrs in NH. One thing I have never doubted is the CNAs are very over worked. They are also the backbone of any Hospital/Nursing Home. You will find burned out CNAs and those are the most dangerous. I also make it a common place to do everything they do as often as I can to help them. In that way they can not say you do not help them. If you empty a foley or 5 on your way down the hall make a note. If there is a difficult resident(heavy/contractures) offer to help with that one. Be prepared for beligerance. They might think you believe they can't do it. 2 people can do 1 thing quicker and easier. Anything you do they have to keep up with, make a note. Then take it to your CNA and tell them they do not have to do these and give them the list to put it on the I/O sheet. Make a second copy if you do not trust them.(date included) When you speak to them don't converse. Do it sweetly. When you are in charge you are the final decision if they have a problem. If you are actually the even/night Sup then you are in charge. But do it gently. It sounds like the Sup. job is on paper only if you are in charge of a unit. I was also the 3-11 sup.for a 400 bed NH. Only a hand full of my time did I have to work a unit. I loved all my girls and they really liked me from the RNs to CNAs. And I respected each and every one. They never like to break in a new nurse but the kinder you are with being in charge the easier it will get. If it does not find another job and secure it and give your 2 week notice.