The "Weigh" Out---A Food Management Support Thread - page 4
Greetings! Many of you know that I have struggled for most of my life with compulsive eating and weight issues. I got my start way back in the 1960s, growing up with an overweight mother who watched my weight obsessively, long... Read More
- 2Apr 3, '09 by Belfegor[quote=vivalasviejas;3545068]well, i will say i've got some of the basics down already..........
the weird thing is the sabotage my entire family seems to be engaging in. i can't believe these people. they all said they would be happy to help me by eating better right along with me. that lasted a whole week.
in the past four days alone, my husband has brought home four large bags of candy. my son has bought doughnuts. it's more than coincidence that all of these items are still sitting at my place at the table. even my sister, who's never been a compulsive eater, is suddenly chomping werther's originals like they're going to be illegal tomorrow---she's eaten four bags that i know of just since last weekend.
it's almost funny---what the hell is wrong with these people??!!
that's called resistance to change!
even though they asked for it, you introduced a change that is threatening their familiar habits.
it is incredible how most people react when their habits are disrupted!
you might have to call them on it and make them face their behavior. give them details like you did for this post.
tell them that you feel like they are sabotaging you, not just your diet. if they are so conscious about the health threat your weight pauses, they need to follow through and get their own insecurities in check!
establish rules: "this", "that" and "that" are forbidden in the house! "if you must eat doughnuts/sweets etc...do it out of my sight and keep the bags/packages at work/in your car/under your mattress/ whatever-find-a-place-where-i-wont-see-it!".
put a piggy bank as a centre piece on the dinner table and tell them that each time you are exposed to temptation by their "fault", they are to put 2 $ in the piggy bank!
and by the way, every time you give in some (not scheduled) "bad" food, you put 5$ in the piggy bank!
you might get enough for a nice massage out of it! (or a vacation if they keep misbehaving!!)
if you make your rules obvious (you can even post short messages around the house), they will slowly have to realize what they are doing and be reminded of what you are trying to achieve.
growing up, i ended up being on every single diet my mother started (along with the rest of the family). my mum clearly stated that she wasn't going to cook two different meals , so "deal with it"!
i can't say that it traumatized me much !
however, when my mum succeeded at loosing about 50 pounds, i remember my reaction....and it wasn't a positive one!
all of a sudden i had this "dry" woman in front of me, instead of the cuddly mother i always had. it was unsettling and i didn't like it ! just the kind of reaction i was telling you about....i was thinking about my own selfish comfort zone instead of being happy for the woman who happens to be my mother!
of course, i wasn't selfish enough to voice my thoughts (thank god!) and soon enough, my mum's new found confidence won me over (or i just got used to her new image, go figure).
your family probably doesn't even realize what they are doing, and that's why you need to point it out to them, so they become conscious of the pattern and can change it.
as i was warming up a frozen meal today, i actually thought about you and other members on this thread.... i gained about 25 pounds in the first few months after i moved to the us (the food was different than what i was used to, and i walked so much less etc...) but when i got my first traveling job in san-fran, i started shedding pounds without even trying.
this is why:
i was too lazy too cook, so i would buy those "diet" frozen meals. i would take 2 with me to work and warm one up for my first break, and the second one later on. same thing at home. all in all, i think i would eat about 4 of them per day.
each is about 300 calories, so it came up to a total of 1200 calories per day if i didn't eat anything else.
of course, it tends to become a bit boring after a while....
the other thing that helped, was that i didn't use my car there. i lived downtown and walked almost everywhere (and some streets are pretty steep!)
both changes combined made for a 20 pounds loss within 3.5 months.
i hope it can give you some ideas....
good luck with your family and congratulations on resisting their "evil" temptations!
- 1Apr 4, '09 by VivaLasViejas, ASN, RN GuideAwesome post, Belfegor, and thank you!!
It's amazing, how much I THOUGHT I knew about nutrition from having studied it in college and working to keep my knowledge base current. Then today while we were all out shopping for Easter and other things, the inevitable happened and we got hungry. I'm not a fan of fast food, but since a Burger King was the closest place to eat I figured I'd just eat something small from the Value menu.
Well, my two-dollar meal cost me nearly 600 calories!!! And I was still a little hungry when I finished my small chicken sandwich (scraped most of the mayo off) and about 15 French fries off my husband's tray, plus a 16-oz Diet Coke. I didn't know until after I'd gotten halfway through my meal that they have nutrition information on all their food on the back of the paper placemats. Here I thought I'd gotten off cheap with my 'light' lunch...........and we won't even talk about the sodium and fat content.
It just makes me sick---I don't even want to think how many calories must be lurking in my favorite Red Robin meal (Whiskey River BBQ burger, a full basket of fries and a chocolate shake)!!! No wonder I used to feel like I was going to have a coronary when I got up from the table.........I'm probably lucky that I DIDN'T.
Another day, another lesson learned. Hey, at least I'm down a little over 10# since the 15th of last month, so I suppose it's worth it. And without a doubt I FEEL better, my energy level is good and I don't tire as quickly as I did, even though I'm still over 300 lbs. Every little bit helps.
- 1Apr 4, '09 by litbitblackWow so many stories. I would like the support of this group also. so many different things have happened in my life to contribute to my weight and i also have a family history. I was sitting and trying to figure out when i actually started noticing changes in my life. I have recently been eating a small pint of blue bell vanilla icecream almost every single day. Yes i know the calories, but on top of it i add chocolate syrup. lots of it. so why in the world when i am sitting there oh so enjoying the taste of it but at the same time knowing the freaking amazingly ridiculous amount of calories and fat included in my indulgence do i continue to eat it? I haven't figured it out yet. I know i tend to eat it when no one is around. And i got to thinking that i used to watch my mom eat big bowls of ice cream and 3-4 fudgecicles at a time and think " oh my god doesn't she realize thats why she is so big". SO Y am i continuing to do this self destructive behavior. I have never really been skinny. my dad remarried when i was 8 and my step mom would throw a hissy fit if i ate anything in between meals. She would say" you can't eat that or this cause there won't be anything left." So i would start sneaking just so i wouldn't have to hear that. i currently weigh 290. i have been this big before and lost weight. it was 14 yrs ago after my daughter was born. I recently quit smoking again. 5 weeks ago as a matter of fact. Gained 12 pounds from it. I have no desire to start exercising. I know i need to. i also know that i do better with loosing weight with diet like weightwatchers(tried in the past and lost 12 lbs and some inches but went on vacation and that included diet lol) but i just can't seem to get the gumption to go exercise. My husband works an odd shift so we don't have normal dinners. its so expensive to eat healthy. I even bought the six week body makeover and figured out my metabolism and put the exercise part together but the plan is mostly chicken and fish and some fruits and vegetables i don't like so i never actually touched it. who can eat yucky oatmeal with splenda everysingle day. to me its nasty and i would rather not eat that have to eat that. WOW i have tons of issues....lol....HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! any support would be grateful. I even want to take water aerobics but my friends don't have a membership, cant afford one or continue to make up excuses. so i have noone to help motivate me. so any suggestions will be appreciated. I did not buy any icecream today....so i did accomplish something.
- 0Apr 4, '09 by VivaLasViejas, ASN, RN GuideQuote from TurnLeftSideI'm beginning to believe some of the stuff I've been hearing about diet soda over the years, that I never wanted to admit might be true. Your story illustrates one of my own discoveries since I stopped drinking it by the gallon every day. And I'm only exaggerating a little; I used to drink the equivalent of a 2-liter bottle of Diet Coke every single day!I've noticed that since I've stopped drinking diet coke, that I'm not as hungry as I was when I did drink it.
Here's another: I've noticed that my system has become so sensitive to diet soda that I can no longer drink it by itself without my blood sugar going into the dumper. We're talking FSBS in the 40's, confusion, cold sweat, extreme hunger and irritability, the whole nine yards. I'm OK as long as drink it with food, but otherwise I have to leave it alone. And I suppose it's not the worst thing in the world........the stuff's not good for me anyway.
What confuses me is why diet soda does that to me when no other artificially sweetened beverages bother me at all. I can drink Crystal Light and iced tea with Sweet & Low all day, and I'm fine. I also drink a lot of water, which is my drink of choice at work where it's 80 degrees in the hallway and the rooms!
- 1Apr 5, '09 by BelfegorQuote from litbitblackhey! it's already something!it's like quitting smoking! one day at the time! congratulations on that by the way, it is no small achievement!wow so many stories. i would like the support of this group also. . i did not buy any icecream today....so i did accomplish something.
let's start with the positives, instead of the negatives:
what do you enjoy doing that could be considered like physical exercise?
what kind of food do you like that could be considered "healthy"?
do you have a dog that would need being walked?
what kind of unit and shifts do you work?
i think that like quitting to smoke, eating healthy is more a mind set than anything else. learning to listen to your own body, trying to be kind to yourself instead of looking at your flaws. what i'm getting at is that often we don't even realize that we eat way more than what we really need.to be able to "feel" that, you need to pay close attention to the signals your body sends you.
do you need to finish that plate? are you really still hungry? did 20 minutes pass since you started your meal? if not, the signals of satiety won't have time to reach your brain. do you eat in front of the tv, the computer? if so, you are not paying attention to your meal and how much you ate.
try eating with no other distraction than what is in front of you (food wise i mean).
i can relate to the ice cream binge...i have a sweet tooth too and find it difficult to resist chocolate!
so i don't!
what i mean is that i allow myself one treat per day. but it has to be early enough so i have enough time afterward to burn what i ate, and i limit my intake to one piece of candy (like one small twix). the rest of the day i make sure that i eat mostly vegetables, and make several smaller meals so i never feel hungry (unless i'm working, and then i go hungry for 12 hours, but that's another issue).
it might take a bit of time for your stomach to "shrink" and feel satisfied by smaller amounts of food, but if you keep at it, it will happen and you will find yourself eating 1/3 of what you use to eat without the pang of hunger.
you did it for your smoking cravings (i assume) so i think you are strong enough to get on this journey as well.
try to project yourself into the future when you have the figure you want to achieve, and keep this positive image to motivate you.
i feel like a fraud for "giving advice" but i am merely sharing ideas, and for you to take it with a grain of salt.
overall, if you could find things that you enjoy doing (like i wrote in an earlier post, if you enjoy dancing, make sure you do it daily- even if it's in the bathroom!) you should aim at making this a positive change instead of a torture.
if you fall off the wagon one day doesn't mean that you failed! it is only one day, and the next will be better. each small effort counts and adds up....one less pint of ice cream per day would already be great!
good luck and let us know how you are doing.
- 0Apr 5, '09 by WildcatFanRNI know what I must do to help myself become healthier. I have discovered it is soooo easy to talk myself out of doing something, or doing something else so its now too late in the evening. I have a curves membership, it will only take 30min out of my day to go. I talk myself into doing something else instead of going. I am tackling my eating habits head on though. People have told me that you can only gain weight if you overeat, that undereating does not lead to weight-gain. I am proof that undereating indeed leads to weight-gain. Undereating added with not excercising equals weight gain.
My problem is eating when I'm not really hungry, I can't. Then later I'll snack on something and not have an actual meal for the entire day. I don't know what I'm classified as, I do binge eat sometimes....but not always.
- 0Apr 9, '09 by BelfegorQuote from wildcatfanrni know what i must do to help myself become healthier. i have discovered it is soooo easy to talk myself out of doing something, or doing something else so its now too late in the evening. i have a curves membership, it will only take 30min out of my day to go. i talk myself into doing something else instead of going. i am tackling my eating habits head on though. people have told me that you can only gain weight if you overeat, that undereating does not lead to weight-gain. i am proof that undereating indeed leads to weight-gain. undereating added with not excercising equals weight gain.
my problem is eating when i'm not really hungry, i can't. then later i'll snack on something and not have an actual meal for the entire day. i don't know what i'm classified as, i do binge eat sometimes....but not always.
maybe you can take advantage of your so-called "weakness".....most diets recommend eating like a cat. in other words, you take your total intake for the day and divid it by 4 or 5 (smaller) meals.
have those portions ready (like in tupperwares or frozen meals) so you can eat what you have planned ahead (healthy, balanced small meals). it will be so easy to access, or warm up, that you are less likely to binge or even substitute them for less healthy and more caloric food.
for example, you can have an assortment of fruits peeled and cut in a few small containers. divide some tuna you mixed with olive oil and herbs and, let say cucumbers, in another set of small tupperware etc....then set your watch or alarm, or egg minuter (or whatever is convenient- like you cell phone if you are at work) to ring every 3 to 4 hours. when it rings, take a few minutes to breath, sit down, and eat what you prepared. don't skip because you aren't hungry, just see it as taking your medication if you really aren't hungry. in that case, light food usually goes down well. fruits for example are the type of food you don't need to be hungry to eat, its fresh and juicy and even sweet...
in between those smaller meals, make sure to drink a lot of water (or tea, infusion, ice tea etc...but not the kind full of sugar!if you really need the sweet taste, use brown sugar or honey....or even sweetener ) to stay hydrated and flush out toxins etc...
i hope you can give this a try and let us know how it works for you?
oh, and by the way, exercise will make you gain "weight"....muscle weight that is. i am sure you already know this, but when you exercise and feed your muscles, your balance will show an increased weight because muscle is heavier than fat. so maybe your balance isn't the best way to judge your progress! your appearance is! the way you fit in your cloths is!
gaining muscle is definitely a great slimming tool because the more muscle you have, the more you increase your basal metabolic rate, wich means that you continue to burn calories even when you are resting! that's a great deal: the more muscles you have, the more you will burn calories, even in your sleep and eventually, your "weight" will stabilize itself and you won't even care what your balance reads, because you'll know that you are in the best shape from what the mirror tells you and how you feel in your own body!