Tonight I was literally pooped upon

Yep, remembering taking off my shoe one day and hosing it down in the hopper d/t the poop all over it. But, continued on while wearing non-skid socks.

After someone had diarrhea down my leg, I learned not to pull someone's brief down until their butt is directly over the toilet.

I did not have a change of clothes that day...

I had my share of shifts where I ended up not wearing the same uniform I started out with. My highlight: wearing the content of a JP. And they wonder where our warped sense of humor comes from. But then there are moments like this: Two CNAs asked me to try and convince this cognizant male resident to let them perform personal care for him. He was determined to stay in his present state of hygiene and clothes. Just about out of ideas, I said, "look, you have two beautiful women trying to care for you, what else could you ask for", his prompt reply," sonny, at my age I'd rather have a hamburger". I was laughing so hard, he couldn't help but laugh himself. We got him a hamburger and he ended up letting us give him a whirlpool bath.

I love when these threads get started,they always give me a laugh!
Scenario: Me as nursing student
A.M care for resident with c-diff
Learned quickly what c-diff was
After cleaning her 6 times thought I was good to go
Turned her to reposition in the bed
Her buttocks were aimed at me,no undies at this point on pt
Does the term "Mudmask" mean anything????
Instructor looks in from door
"I guess I'll just bring lunch back for you" she says as she giggles down the hall
But I got an A from her for pt care...think she just felt bad for me,lol.

I had graduated about 6 weeks before but hadn't taken the NCLEX yet and had been pulled from my ortho floor to ICU because there was a flu bug going around and they were desperate to the max to send newbie me. There I was trying not to freak out or, worse yet, burst into tears. I had been assigned their most stable patient who was to be transferred to the step down unit later in the day. So far... so good...right? Wrong! All was going TOO well until my patient dropped her glasses over the side and the went under the bed. I bend down but couldn't q-u-i-t-e reach them, so I got down and stretched to reach under, just as the woman in the next bed barfed some bloody stuff that smelled like GI bleed just as she lifted her leg up and pooped absolutely liquid, slimey (sp.?), gross, mucusy, bloody, obnoxiously foul smelling poop that sprayed all over my back, legs, backside, back of my head, in my hair, inside my shoes... I have NO idea where it all came from. I ended up washing my hair in green soap at the utility room sink (I don't recommend it as shampoo) then showering in the doctors' locker room and borrowing scrubs and undies. E-Yuck! I went home and seriously reconsidered my career choices! By the weekend, it was funny and made a good gross out my friends and relatives story!


Kathy
sharpeimom

these stories are so grossly wonderful. only a nurse (or aide, etc.) would understand!

suesquatch, this is definitely in the running for best post title ever! i snorted when i read it. it's almost poetic.

should we turn it into shakespearean verse? hmm...i'm not sure the meter's right. i hope i don't get booted for this:

"late into the eve, when the moon's rays twere aglimmer in their brilliance, thus descended upon me a rain of scat, verily."



i love the dear, old ones too.