My husband is driving me crazy..... - page 2
We got into an argument last night because of me being registered for A&P II for January. He thinks I should not take the course because I had such a tough time this fall. He thinks I should take... Read More
Jan 5, '03If this is what you want then do it....It is a great stress not only on you but also on your family, but you can succeed if you are completely committed. I had the support of my husband when I started this a yr and half ago....then he slowly started feeling left out...boohoo...and proceeded to let me know that he felt like I was replacing him with school....PLEASE!! Anyway I told him that with or without his help/support that I would finish this and that I would EAT anyone that got in my way! I start back the 13th and we are contemplating divorce........don't let anyone tell you you cant do this....
Jan 5, '03Follow your heart.
Explain to your hubby where as he is entitled to his opinion, you would rather he try to be supportive of you, instead of encouraging you to quit yet again.
Jan 6, '03no one knows you better than you -- please don't let him decide what is best for you! Of course his opinion matters, but you have to do what you feel is best, and maybe he'll come around and give you the support you need. Anyway, you won't know its for you until you try it. I agree with luluann, maybe you should try working as a CNA.
Jan 6, '03Take some time for yourself when no one else is home. Sit in a darkened room, or light a few candles, take a few deep breaths, and just think about this for a good 20 minutes or so. The decision you need to make will come to you. This is what I always do when I have something worrying me, or a decision that I have to make. You need to listen to the INNER you for guidance. It sounds like your husband is perhaps threatened by your decision, and feels that he needs to control your school choices. When you talk to him about it, don't be combattive, but gently tell him how you feel, and why you want to take class ___.
I agree that you should continue into A&P II since I is still fresh on your mind. If YOU think you will be a good nurse, then you have the potential to be one!!
Good luck to you.
Jan 6, '03That is mean and nasty. I am sorry. Don't let him shake you like that. Shake him.................
Jan 6, '03Is it possible that he's picking up your indeciveness (sp) and is not sure about how you really feel? It sounds like he wants to be supportive of you, but isn't really sure of where you're headed academically.
I've seen way too many people that seem to put their schooling ahead of their marriage, and I think it's sad. Sometimes it's for the best, but so much of the time it seems unnecessary.
My rule of thumb is how would I feel if the situation were reversed? Could you put yourself in your husband's place and see things from his perspective? It's not to say that his opinion or yours is MORE important, they're both valid and important. It's the understanding of where someone is coming from that is the issue.
It sounds like he has some valid points and you've recognized that-kudo's for you both!
I guess I just want to gently remind people that people are what count, and school is important, but it's not everything. I hope I make some sense.
Jan 6, '03My ex did everything he could think of to get me to fail nursing school, it only made me more determined and stronger. Notice I said ex !!! Yup, I told him I was going to divorce him, I graduated in may, served him with papers 1 week later, took the nclex and passed, got my first job and was deleriously happy. That all happened 8 yrs. ago and I never regretted it. Don't let anyone tell you what you can or can't be, only you know. Good luck with school.
Jan 7, '03Sounds like a control freak to me. I was married to one of those while in ADN school. Lip service support was all I got and then when I got a 3.8 for my first semester he filed for divorce. A little bit threatened I'd say... Now happily married for 6 years to a really supportive guy and happy to be rid of Mr. Control. Good luck to you! Take the A&P II.
Jan 8, '03Update:
Last night my husband told me that I should take whatever classes I want and he apoligized. He said he was being selfish and was worried about having to take on extra duties around the house and with the kids. I was off for 4 months from work and he really didn't have to do much, but now I am back to work and he knows that he has to do more.
He really is not a controlling person, but does offer up his opinion easily.
I think he read everyone's posts here and realized what he was doing.
Thanks everyone for your support.
Jan 8, '03Originally posted by opalm
If you are soooooo awful, why is he hangin around?
I guess I am not. It'll be 21 years this May.