I began nursing school
fresh out of high school. I believed nursing would allow me to do what I have always wanted, and that was to help as many people as possible. Fast forward three years later, and I have just failed out of a ADN program at a community college. I don't struggle with understanding the content or applying it. Its just when I am taking these tests it feels like everything is going to come crashing down. Ridiculous, I know.
Everyone knows that nursing school is difficult and I really think that it got to me. I excelled in the clinical setting without issue and received excellent remarks from clinical instructors and other nurses. I work in a large hospital right now as a CNA as well. Right now, there are people who are alive because of things I have done there who wouldn't be otherwise. I love the teamwork aspect of running codes as well (you learn a new appreciation for life). I think the reason I was unsuccessful is the increasingly painful depression and the fact that I get so nervous before tests I see spots and almost pass out. I know that its ridiculous, believe me. Up until this one class Ive been able to overcome it and be successful. Not this time though. I have accomplished so much, and in the end I am continuously holding myself back.
So, I have a few options. I have to start over either way.
1) Start LPN school in the fall and start working, then go back to finish RN, then BSN.
2) Wait a year and reapply to the program and start over.
3) There is one other school I can start in the spring (but its expensive).
4) Realize that I have already been unsuccessful in this nursing program; select another career.
I still want to be a nurse despite seeing all the struggles they go through. But, I also realize there is nothing wrong with accepting that this is not what I am cut out for. I have to overcome the anxiety/depression in order to be successful regardless of what I see is the best fit for me.
ANY advice or stories about other people who have been in my situation would be very much appreciated.