What's the worst thing the workplace bully did to you? has done to you? - page 3

I worked with a so-called nurse that took every monthly note out of the eight pts charts that I had to chart on and did God knows what with them. I couldn't prove it, but she was the only nurse at... Read More

  1. by   rebel_red
    Originally posted by funnygirl_rn
    Sheeeeeeesh!! That woman is lucky I didn't put that ABD pad on her windshield...what a witch!! Agh!!

    Before or after you used it hon? Our NM would have laughed her butt off and hung up. Can not believe she actually called her at home over an ABD pad.....


    Tres
  2. by   mattsmom81
    Originally posted by colleen10
    Not to get away from the topic at hand but I don't think Rebel is saying that the people who are being abused are playing the "victim" on purpose and enjoy it.

    I think she just meant that in her experience, sticking up for yourself at the get go when you first observe this type of behavior can often "nip it in the bud" so to speak. If you stick up for yourself in the first few weeks of working with a person like this they won't want to bother with you because you won't let them push you around.

    This works with your average 'schoolyard' bully, but not those who have wormed their way into positions of power. These are a different animal; cunning, often charismatic, with sociopathic personalities. They are difficult to spot (initially), and do NOT back down when you confront them. They simply become more subversive and pick up the attack if you challenge them. My solution: get out. And I will from now on.

    Someone who feels bullied EVERYWHERE they work is likely to benefit from assertiveness training, and may play a role in the problem. Many here have described one incident in a long career. A blanket statement regarding 'what do you get out of this' when we run into one in 20 yrs and acknowledge it, is not fair, IMO.
  3. by   funnygirl_rn
    Originally posted by rebel_red
    Before or after you used it hon? Our NM would have laughed her butt off and hung up. Can not believe she actually called her at home over an ABD pad.....Tres

    Heehee...after I used it! Seriously...I would never do that...but the thought did occur as I was walking out to the parking lot!
  4. by   Hellllllo Nurse
    I was physically assaulted by a charge nurse once, in front of other staff. She flipped out because a pts' family member had not signed the pt's belongings list. Well, she really flipped out because she was a crazy, drunken low-life, but the belongings list was her excuse.

    This nurse often came to work very hung over and unable to work. I was flabbergasted when our director took the charge nurse's side. It was just unreal.

    I transferred to another unit soon afterwards. And the nurse who assaulted me?
    I saw in the BON newsletter about six months later that she'd lost her license, court ordered revocation.

    The boss that defended this wacko..well she's whole other thread. She was mean and abusive to many good staff. Especially good and kind CNAs. She drove all our good ones away.


    Another crazy drunken nurse threatend (in front of other staff) to pour hot coffee on me, because he did not want to listen to report. He said "Blah blah. Everything's the same, whatever." I told him that, no, we'd had admits, pts' conditions had changed and that he had to listen to report.

    He held the coffee up over my face. I reported him to mgmt, and they called him in for a meeting. He showed up w/ a lawyer, so they backed down. I took that oportunity to quit that job, and go back to school to get my ADN.

    This nurse told me how he'd broken into the supervisor's office and taken all the write ups and verbal warnings he'd received out of his file. We'd had nine clinical managers in three years. So, he got a clean slate w/ each new boss that came along.

    The unit was a very fancy inpt hospice unit. The nurse who'd threatend me w/ the coffee quit a few moths later, then brought his truck to the unit and helped himself to the pictures on the walls, lamps, etc.

    He was later investigated by the BON and local law enforcment for suspicion of causing the death of several pts. The case was dropped for lack of evidence.
    Last edit by Hellllllo Nurse on Jul 11, '03
  5. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    I don't quite have such a degree of bullying that others on this thread do.

    Right now i am a CNA, starting this august on my second year of PN school. I have one LPN that ALWAYS gives me a hard time!

    First off she is in her 50's, completing her LPN schooling about two years ago, and is now persuing ADN. She's worked as a nurse for the past 2 years, and these are the only two years of her life that she's ever had a job. Her husband owns his own business that is extremely well-paying (I know this because she points this out at every available opportunity). And never fails to complete a shift without aying "you know i don't HAVE to work, i only do this for something to do." heck if that's what nursing is to you, and you want "something to do", why not come to my laundry and housecleaning??? It would keep her occupied for at least 5 days.

    Point of this: this stuck up attitude of hers is ridiculous. There are many aspects of her job that are beneath her, constantly states "that's not MY job", when in fact she is to help ME help her patients in that way (supervisor told her this). If an incontinent patient is messy, she will take 30 minutes to find an aide to clean them up before she would EVER do it herself, has done this to me several times, then swears that she's too busy to help if that patient cannot roll themselves over (doesn't matter to her if someone throws their back out on a 300 lb. patient by themselves), THEN complains that it was my fault that the patient sat in it, but nevermind i have 34 other pateints to check on. I peak out of the room while i'm helping this person, and there she is, HARD AT WORK, putting in an order at landsend.com!!! Don't get me wrong, she is busy a lot, but when it comes to the "lowly help" things, better for her to pawn it off on someone else is her motto.

    The thing i'm running into now is that while trying to be at two places at once (i work with 4 other nurses, on a floor with 35 beds, i float the entire floor), she threatens to report me (or any other aides that are working with her) ALL the TIME!! The latest "report threat" came because i was one minute late (ONE MINUTE NO JOKE) on my Q4 vitals on a pt. (due to ANOTHER patient that had vomited on himself and assisting another nurse with cleaning that poor man up). "you know I should report you to _____ about this". I ought to get her a tshirt that says that for Christmas....

    She complains when she has 5 patients that it's too much. An average night can have the nurses with 6 or 7 patients per nurse, but she never has more than 4 typically. Or the charge nurse will try to assign another patient to her and she complains that she's "got too much already", and some poor nurse winds up with 7 just so she'll pipe down.

    She'd have every right to report me if i am doing something wrong. However, i do my job, i know i do it well, not meaning i'm perfect, but as far as i'm concerned what i'm guilty of now is being quiet when she taunts me with that "report you" comment. grrrrrrrr

    I remind myself I won't treat people the way she is the CNA's.
    Last edit by Marie_LPN, RN on Jul 11, '03
  6. by   flashpoint
    Used to work in LTC and we had an LPN who would run around and make sure toothbrushes were wet after reseidents were helped to bed. Not a bad idea, because I know oral care is skipped sometimes, but we also had a CNA that would run around with a hair dryer and dry all of the toothbrushes. The same CNA would also chew up crackers, chocolate, etc and spit bits of it into denture cups after the dentures had been cleaned. (Same LPN checked denture cups!) I caught the CNA doing the spit thing one night and sent her home. Also worked with a CNA who would use toilets in empty rooms and not flush! Empty rooms at the LTC were only cleaned weekly, so if she did it right after they were cleaned, sometimes her mess wouldn't be found for a week!

    The latest and greatest...I work in a hospital now. We have a CNA that wanted a night off because her sister was visiting from out of town. Census was low, so two nurses were called off. The CNA called them both and begged them to let her take low census so she could spend time with her sister. Both refused...one had a sick kid and would have had to call off anyway and the other made plans with her family. The CNA ended up calling in sick and went to both of the nurses homes and slashed the tires on their cars...police caught her as she was slashing the last tire. She was fired the next day...
  7. by   VickyRN
    I have seen my share, too. One small hospital was taken over by a true sociopath and the place run in the ground--had to file bankruptcy before this EVIL DON/CNO/CFO lady was run off. A lot of nurse managers or DONs refuse to acknowledge or deal with the horizontal violence which is SO pervasive in nursing. "Don't make waves" is the unspoken mantra in most health-care facilities. Unfortunately, bullying has serious effects: low morale, high turnover, and most importantly--PATIENT CARE IS COMPROMISED!!! Sometimes, the patients' very lives are at stake. My advice to you nurse managers: take bullying seriously and nip it in the bud--confront it head-on--don't just ignore it because IT WON'T GO AWAY on its own. Each health care facilty should adopt a NO TOLERANCE POLICY FOR BULLYING and enforce it!
  8. by   RNNMD
    Hi all, I have been a nurse for 23 years and have worked with every imaginable type of personality. I am now working with a male nurse who is torturing me. A few months ago, I called him on a potentially harmful error that involved a transfusion. Since then he is doing everything possible to make me look incompetent. we all make mistakes and I am certainly not perfect but this fellow is making up mistakes. I have followed the chain of command but for some reason, our head nurse is not seeing what everyone else sees. It doesn't make it better that he is smooth and knows just what to say.
    I have submitted proof of his actions to her and nothing. I recently attempted to go over her head but the ADON does not want to get involved.
    I don't know about any of you all out there, but when I think I have to cover my a__, I mess upmore.Isn't it bad enough that we have to guard ourselves against patients and families, now its co-workers.
    All because of frail egos HELPPPPPPPP
  9. by   RNNMD
    hI IT'S ME AGAIN. I WAS READING WHAT EVERYONE ELSE HAS OR HAD POSTED. I WANT TO SAY THAT I AM NO SHRINKING VIOLET. I AM EXTREMELY ASSERTIVE AND CALL A SPADE A SPADE. THIS IS THE PRIMARY REASON FOR THIS MAN'S ATTACKS. I DON'T THINK HE IS GOD AND WILL NOT GO ALONG WITH HIM IF I ABSOLUTELY KNOW HE IS WRONG. IT ALL COMES DOWN TO THE FACT THAT I'VE BEEN AROUND A WHILE AND KNOW MORE THAN HE DOES AND IT DRIVES HIM WILD. HAS PULLED THIS CRAP ON EVERY NURSE THAT COMES TO THE FLOOR AND HAS MORE EXPERIENCE THAN HIMSELF. I JUST HAPPEN TO BE THE ONLY ONE THAT EVER REPORTED HIM. PLUS I DON'T FLIRT WITH HIM.
    WE WORK ON A VERY BUSY MEDICAL/RENAL/ONCOLOGY UNIT.
    THERE IS AN OLD EXPRESSION, "NUSES EAT THEIR OWN" WHICH WAS EXPANDED FROM "NURSES EAT THEIR YOUNG"
    PLEASE, ANY NEW GRADS OUT THERE, DON'T LET ANY OF THIS DETER YOU FROM A FABULOUS PROFESSION. I'VE BEEN AROUND A LONG TIME AND THERE ARE DAYS WHEN MY FAVORITE EXPRESSION IS, "I'M GOING TO WAL-MART TO GET AN APPLICATION TO BE A GREETER!"
  10. by   rebelwaclause
    Originally posted by colleen10
    I did, I did just find my new motto!

    Let me see if it appears as my sig. line.
    :chuckle ... Now don't you feel empowered?

  11. by   rebelwaclause
    Originally posted by mattsmom81
    Pretty harsh comment IMO Rebel. Let's blame the victim, eh?

    One thing I have learned, is no matter how dysfunctional, vindictive or sick these types are, they also are frequently politically astute and know how to come out of things smelling like a rose. They know how to work the organization to their advantage, and enjoy creating chaos. Perhaps undiagnosed borderline personality nurses?? Who knows?? Perhaps you have been fortunate enough to not run across sickos like Scotty, Nimbex, I and others have described. Lucky you.

    It's also a hallmark of a dysfunctional institution to find these types in power...but we all know how dysfunctional healthcare facilities can be don't we.

    Call me naive once....but NOW I KNOW from experience these types are out there and how they operate. I am wary, believe me...as they can wreak havoc with our life and livelihood. I wish my Mom had warned me about 'em, which is why I like to warn my kids and younger associates.
    Is this fair? Nope. I know they are out there...No doubt. I am saying stand up for yourselves, and the drama will soon end. They'll get tired of getting socked back and prey on an easier target. That's all.

    As far as being "harsh"...I tell it the way I see it. Sometimes the truth hurts - But it sets us free.....
  12. by   rebelwaclause
    Originally posted by colleen10
    Not to get away from the topic at hand but I don't think Rebel is saying that the people who are being abused are playing the "victim" on purpose and enjoy it.

    I think she just meant that in her experience, sticking up for yourself at the get go when you first observe this type of behavior can often "nip it in the bud" so to speak. If you stick up for yourself in the first few weeks of working with a person like this they won't want to bother with you because you won't let them push you around.
    You've got it, Colleen10! :kiss
  13. by   ktwlpn
    Originally posted by rebelwaclause
    Is this fair? Nope. I know they are out there...No doubt. I am saying stand up for yourselves, and the drama will soon end. They'll get tired of getting socked back and prey on an easier target. That's all.

    And then they just become your co-worker's problem....There is not a place in healthcare for a workplace bully because they will not hesitate to put a patient in jeopardy to get at their target. We do need to stand up for what's right by documenting our butts off and going up our chain of command-Workplace bullying is a form of harrasment and that's illegal-and can escalate into violence...Administration MUST be made to deal with these people..Our institution has put a great program into place for us to refer staff to with personal or intrapersonal issues....Unfortunatly it's like pulling teeth to get someone sent there...The supervisors are great at handing out the business cards whenever anyone has a bad day and "could benefit from counseling" That is not all the program is for-the seminar I went to about it focused on violence in the workplace and bullying....Staff can be given an ultimatum to attend a consult and be evaluated and then must follow the prescribed program (ordered number of sessions) to keep their job....BUt it generates alot of paperwork and takes time....

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