welcome to the hilton...please dont forget to tip your waitress - page 22

i have no idea where the er is getting these people from but i wish theyd send them back...lol they are sick..yes...but for goodness sakes! i cant raise the head of my bed (i can however use... Read More

  1. by   bam_bam
    Quote from SmilingBluEyes
    She did not feel like getting up to brush her teeth but got UP to CONTAMINATE the ICE MACHINE/KITCHEN with her spit-in pitcher?????????????!!

    Ummm freaking GROOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSs and senseless.
    Just wanted to clarify, we got her a new pitcher to use with the ice machine:chuckle
  2. by   GirlArcher
    One of my favs...68 year old female in for COPD to Swing Bed (don't you just love "swing bed" ) status. Yelling very loudly, "Nurse, nurse, nurse!!!" go in to find her having a "panic attack" stating, "I can't breath".....she is on O2 per NC @ 6L, which she has taken off.....again.....for the tenth time that shift. I put it back on and explain why she needs to leave it on....Leave the room and return to my duties. 20 minutes later, the CNA finds me and asks if "B"'s O2 should be at 2.5L.....uuummmmm no, it should be higher....her Sat is a lovely 70%.....This is the 100th time she has turned her oxygen down. One day she told me she was blind and the doctors didn't know why....and yet she was tracking me with her eyes and watching me pass in the hallway and was able to call out to me.....mmmmmmm??:uhoh21: Ya gotta luv em
  3. by   lifeisbeautiful
    In the recovery Room, we will occasionally have patients that will go home from there. One of the criteria is to make sure they are tolerating liquids. I offered my patient a choice of 4 types of juice and he had the nerve to look at me (and he was serious) and asked me if I could get him some fresh squeezed carrot juice. What in the ? This is a *******' hospital, not Jamba juice! :angryfire
  4. by   xmaxiex
    I haven't laughed so hard in a long time ! Last week when I dealt with an irate family member demanding to know why I didn't have time to clean her mothers jewelery in colgate toothpaste(apparantly this works well) . I stopped and laughed thinking of all my kindred nurse souls across the planet steppin and fetchin !

    If only I had known what nursing was really all about !
  5. by   lyceeboo
    Quote from donmurray
    Pull you up in bed? I'm sorry sir/madam, but this unit has a "No Lift" policy, in order that patients be encouraged to participate in light therapeutic movement, to reduce incidence of DVT, and so as not to foster dependency, which in turn leads to a longer hospitalisation. Do it yourself.
    That's a great one!! I'm going to use this next time. Last night my pt. kept calling for his "waitress". This is not the first time I've been called that.
  6. by   laurakoko
    I love this thread.......... I got a GOOD one.

    It was 7:40 PM, and I am standing at the employee elevator with my purse on my shoulder, stethescope off my neck, jacket off, ready to go.

    A family member walks up to me and asks me to get her some ice.

    I gazed at her for a second, thinking, don't you see that I am off duty and leaving?!?!?, she says then, well can you get me some ice?
    I then said, nope, my elevator is here.
    WHAT are these people thinking??????????????????????
  7. by   Cherybaby
    This thread has been a riot! I loved reading it and knowing I am in GREAT company!!!

    I do a lot of plastic surgery. We have a lot of young girls coming in to get breast implants. We always ask them to bring pictures of what size they would like to be, the look they are expecting, etc. We do this on purpose so that everyone is on the same page.

    Well, we had one little lady who wanted to be "a nice full B". (She was so flat she was practically inverted!) We suggested that she goes to a "C" because generally, women like the way they look while the breasts are still swollen. Then, the swelling goes away, the boobs go down some, and they aren't as happy.

    Nope. Make me a B.

    So, we make her a nice full B.

    Two days later...she wants her breasts redone. She wants more saline added. Okay, we said. No problem...we still had another 150cc's more to go in her implants. So, we set up surgery...and fill her up.

    One week later...

    I don't like them. They're too small.

    Back into surgery she goes, only now, it's for NEW implants...because her old ones simply wouldn't expand as far as she wanted.

    Two weeks later...

    More saline please.

    Long story short...she is now a size DD and stands STRAIGHT out at attention. One wrong move, and the eyes are poked out.

    We've taken to calling her "Torpedo Tammy".
  8. by   FranEMTnurse
    Anything like this????:hatparty:
  9. by   Town & Country
    Pull you up in bed? I'm sorry sir/madam, but this unit has a "No Lift" policy, in order that patients be encouraged to participate in light therapeutic movement, to reduce incidence of DVT, and so as not to foster dependency, which in turn leads to a longer hospitalisation. Do it yourself.
    UNACCEPTABLE!

    Don't you realize that your main goal in life is to provide the utmost in *Customer Service* so that your patient doesn't even have to move?

    "Is there anything else I can do for you? I HAVE THE TIME"
    :angryfire
  10. by   dazzle256
    Quote from thisnurse
    i have no idea where the er is getting these people from but i wish theyd send them back...lol

    they are sick..yes...but for goodness sakes!

    i cant raise the head of my bed (i can however use the phone and change channels on my tv)

    oh no im having chest pains...my chest really hurts (now while you go call the doc, im gonna call my friend and wish her happy birthday and then ill finish dinner while you warm up the ekg)

    i REALLY REALLY REALLY have to go to the bathroom...right now..oh i have to go. i have to go NOW.
    but first let me watch a little of the grammy's and chat with you a while. you just stay here until im ready to stand up then pivot to my bedside commode (i can do this, i can walk and EVERYTHING, i just need you to stand here)

    could you heat my tray
    could you heat my coffee
    could you heat my coffee again...i didnt drink it yet

    do you have any cream?

    oh i hurt i hurt i hurt ...do you want your morphine? no thanks.

    i dont like this food...get me something i like.

    straighten up my bed (ill stand here and watch you)

    i cant get in bed by myself (i can walk to the bathroom tho)

    pull me up in bed (no theres nothing wrong with my legs, i just like you to do it)

    this week has been CALL BELL HELL
    Maybe they think they are at one of these posh hospitals
    http://www.forbes.com/2003/07/07/cx_...hisSpeed=20000

    I read the article and Forbes says this is where people who go that are tired of "surly" nurses
  11. by   oldiebutgoodie
    Quote from donmurray
    Pull you up in bed? I'm sorry sir/madam, but this unit has a "No Lift" policy, in order that patients be encouraged to participate in light therapeutic movement, to reduce incidence of DVT, and so as not to foster dependency, which in turn leads to a longer hospitalisation. Do it yourself.
    Do units really have "no lift" policies? How do people get moved, then? (I'm not against it at all, I'm just curious!)

    Oldiebutgoodie
  12. by   SmilingBluEyes
    Quote from dazzle256
    Maybe they think they are at one of these posh hospitals
    http://www.forbes.com/2003/07/07/cx_...hisSpeed=20000

    I read the article and Forbes says this is where people who go that are tired of "surly" nurses
    Yes and regarding those "out of pocket" room costs, does any of that trickle down to NURSING?????

    thought not.
  13. by   hipab4hands
    I feel for you!

    Last night, I had a patient call and told me I wasn't "customer service oriented."

    I asked her ask how she came to that conclusion. She told me "because I asked for med X, and you won't get it for me."

    I explained to her that this was a medical facility, not Burger King. I advised her that this in not like a fast food restaurant, where you call in your order and it's ready in 30 minutes or less.

    I offered to send a message to her dr. for a med refill, but the patient refused. She told me that if she couldn't have it now, then she didn't want it at all.

close