unplanned pregnancy after wanting a tubal ligation.....

[MyAngel]

7 years ago, just a few months after I gave birth to my son, I asked my doctor if he would perform a tubal ligation on me and he said "NO". The reasoning behind it was that I was only 22 at the time. I knew I only wanted one child and no more for the rest of my entire life, but still he said he would not do it.....thinking I would eventually change my mind. Instead, he told me the best next thing would be the IUD...which I did get and had for 3 years until it caused major cramps, bleeding for 10 days and inbetween periods and caused a lot of lady partsl infections....

To get to my point... now at the age of nearly 30...a year ago I became pregnant and needless to say I did not want to be pregnant...this unplanned and unwanted pregnancy resulted in 'termination'....my question is...

do i have any grounds to sue my doctor that told me 7 years ago that I could not get a tubal ligation....which led to an abortion....which I think I deserve some sort of compensation for what I had to go through and that could have been avoided if I had my tubes tide in the first place 7 years ago. I knew then and still know now, what I wanted and always wanted...was to have no more children after my one son.

Any help here would be appreciated. Thank you.

[SmilingBluEyes]

No. Personally, I think it's a little odd to think you deserve compensation for this. You had sex knowing you had the chance of becoming pregnant.

Fergus, you just took the words right out of my mouth. Amazing our "entitlement" sense we have in this country. What entitles someone to sue in this case?

To the OP: You have options, one of which you blew by completely. You could have abstained. But seeing as that did not work for you, you had other options too. You can use double protection (hormonal birth control PLUS barrier methods). Your chances of becoming pregnant with double protection were very low. If hormones are not for you, you can use natural family planning and barrier methods. You have had so many means available to you not to become pregnant. And like mentioned, you could have gone back and had that tubal later on.

Well you are in a tough spot, I can see. Now what can you do? Well, You can have an abortion (I am not advocating, just listing as a choice), you can give the child up to a family who desperately wants one. Or you can choose to welcome this unplanned child into your lives and hearts and home.

However you DO NOT automatically have a case for suit! NO ONE DID harm to you! You have to suck it up and make some big decisions now, I guess, and I would be concentrating on what your options are NOW very carefully. I wish you the best, whatever decisions you reach.

[jemb]

Being denied a tubal ligation at the age of 22 by one doctor does not mean that at 25, 26, or 27, you could not have gotten the procedure done. How many years did you attempt to find someone to do the tubal ligation?

I first inquired when I was 22 also. I finally found somone several years later (almost 30 years ago now) that understood and was willing to do the procedure. It was important enough to me to keep pursuing the issue. I also became very ill with an IUD.

Your post did sound like you had ceased to use any birth control at all.

So, now that you are 30, how soon are you getting that tubal done?

[alexillytom]

I have been in your shoes. After having my son at 25 and daughter at 26, I asked for a

tubal. My doctor, who I had been with since I was 17, told me No. I went back on the pill.

When I turned 29, the pills started making me feel ill. We tried adjusting the dosage, then

he took me off, and gave me foam and condoms. As God is my witness, my husband

and I were diligent about using them. A couple of weeks before my 30th birthday, my

daughter TOLD me that her Nana was keeping her baby brother with her in heaven until

it was time for him to come. It was already decided that if we were to get pregnant by

any chance, I would have an abortion.

Lo and behold, I started feeling funny, after a couple of trips to my OBGYN, a negative (blood) pregnancy test, medicine to make my period come, at 4.5 months gestation, I

received a positive test result. Too late to do anything about it. Thank God. My son

is an absolute angel. But, as soon as I delivered, I had my tubal.

[BabyRN2Be]

I guess many doctors are hestitant to do so because you never know what might happen in life. You may think that you are "done" with your 1 child at 21.

I remember what happened to a woman involved in the OKC bombing. I can't remember her name (I know what she looks like - I hate that!) but she lost 2 boys in the bombing. She was in her early 20's, had her two boys (Colton and Chance) and didn't want to have any more. A doctor did a tubal after her last delivery. She lost both her little boys, and she couldn't have any more! I remember a TV interview with her, and that's the first thing that she said. She eventually got remarried and wanted to have a few more babies. However, the surgery done to reverse the tubal did not work. She eventually got pregnant through IVF. Last time I checked, the average IVF cycle cost a whole lot more than several years of birth contol!!

You just don't know what will happen in life. Ask the relatives of the 168 people who went to work like any other day on April 19, 1995. I remember that day so well.

[HyperRNRachel]

JemB said it best. Yes, the dr. stated you WERE too young, but that was 7 years ago. No one should have to pay for your procrastination.

Does the original post have a strong aroma of troll????

[laurakoko]

If you had the tubal ligation, and then wanted another baby, would you then sue the doctor who did it because he didn't talk you out of it?

[LydiaNN]

While I don't agree with doctors who refuse to perform tubal ligations, it is their right to do so, in much the same way it is the right of a physician who refuses to perform abortions or plastic surgery or any of a number of procedures. If it weren't, they could just as easily have people trying to sue them because they decide seven years later that they do want to have another child and aren't able to because he complied with their request. I'm not an attorney, but I hope that you have no legal case against this doctor. Like another poster said, you apparently chose not to pursue a tubal ligation from someone else. This isn't a case of negligence. It is a case of a doctor making a decision based on his beliefs, which happened to be different than your's. Even if, by the most unlikely of scenarios, you were to win a judgement against this doctor, it shouldn't be because you terminated your pregnancy. That was your choice. The only complaint you could have against him is that a pregnancy occured in the first place. BTW- in my experience, the doctor's stand on performiing tubal ligations in such young women is not uncommon. When I was younger, I had a couple of married friends who had trouble obtaining them, even though one of them had 3 kids by the time she was 21. States used to set minimum ages at which doctors were even *allowed* to perform TLs- in PA it was 29, I believe. That has probably changed by now, though.

[Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN]

No. Personally, I think it's a little odd to think you deserve compensation for this. You had sex knowing you had the chance of becoming pregnant.

100% agree.

[traumaRUs, MSN, APRN]

Okay guys - the OP thanked everyone for their answers and admitted that she didn't think there was a basis for a lawsuit - lets move on.

[Spidey's mom, ADN, BSN, RN]

No, no grounds to sue. If so, I could maybe sue my husband for missing his vasectomy appt. 4 years ago :rotfl: . . . .but then I wouldn't have my dear sweet little red-headed almost 3 year old son.

Sometimes "mistakes" turn out well. And truly the stats even for married folks is that well over half the pregnancies are "unplanned". Not that you were never going to have a baby but maybe not at that exact time.

Lots of stories about babies conceived while on BCP. :)

The only fool-proof way to not make a baby is to not have sex.

steph