Rude remarks by doc with his own kids

[Lorie P.]

:uhoh21:last night when i got to work, i was pulled to another floor which did not bother me. as i went walking up the nurse's station, which sits right in front of the elevators, i seen one of our more popular docs finishing rounds with his 2 kids in tow.

doc ben says" ok kids tell them by, kids say by every one ( 7y boy and 4y girl). doc says push the button, the elevators open and he says very loudly ,ok guys let go see the lady with the biggest butt, what floor should we go to? kids reply, we don't know dad. he laughs :lol2:and says how about the first floor by the cafeteria , that usually where they hang out!!'

now this is not the first remark this doc has made, few weeks back, he had same son and son's friend with them, makes the remark, come on boys, let she go show you a big one!

the nurses on the floor just laughed and said that's doc ben for you.

now what kind of example is he setting for his kids? :madface:not to mention, what if family members or worse yet, one of his pt's heard him.

i did tell my nurse manager, who replied, well there's really nothing we can do about that.

i used to have respect for this man, no longer, how very unprofessional, rude and down right mean.:down:

:angryfire:angryfirestill burns me a good one when writing this!!

[pagandeva2000, LPN]

I am not a baby sitter, and would not, under any circumstances watch anyone's child, including a physician. People are funny about their children, and if something were to go wrong with this man's kids (especially if the person is politically connected), then, there is hell to pay.

Unfortunately, there is nothing that can be done, because most times, administration treats physicians like gods, but, I would not take any level of responsibility for watching them. He is breaking HIPPA, though, and taking a risk by exposing his children to disease.

[ebear, BSN, RN]

I used to have an orthopaedic surgeon bring his kids to the O.R. all the time while he made rounds! IT DROVE ME CRAZY!!!!! I was busy doing cases and then they sat in the holding area til he got back. They were very well behaved but I just felt like it was not my job to watch them and resented being dumped on like that! :angryfire

[Weeping Willow]

I think this situation has been made out to to be more important than it is (at least the part about rounding with kids). He can't bend over? The child might cry? These are pretty minor inconveniences that you're kind of magnifying into serious errors in judgement. One would assume that any college educated individual would be able to work out how to do an exam while wearing a baby backpack (eg - raise the bed).

If you think bringing a child to a hospital puts their health at risk, or is inappropriate, or whatever else, that's certainly your right to feel that way. But really, physicians have this right in many facilities, and some choose to exercise it. As long as they're not using hospital staff as free babysitting, and the patient doesn't object to a small child coming to visit them, I don't see why anyone would be so concerned about it.

I once knew a Pediatric Plastic Surgeon who would bring his 10 year old daughter to the ER when he got called to suture. She was as good at calming our scared little patients as Ketamine.

Maybe they should pay her, LOL, just kidding.

but really, what patient is going to feel free to object? The pt is in a powerless position compared to the doctor. This is an abuse of the doctor's power.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

(sorry, i got cut off) there is always somithing you can do. we are not powerless. for starters open your mouth and say "i am not here to babysit your children." and by the way, i am solidly pro-union. have only worked in union hospitals and perhaps that's why i never saw or heard of anything like this particular type of abuse of position. union nurses have more self respect and would simply say "doctor's babysitter is not in my job discription."

i've seen this more than once in union hospitals. the physician brings his kids in, plops them at the nurse's station and then starts rounds assuming, i guess, that whoever was at the nurse's station when he dropped them off would be too intimidated to just leave the kids sitting there. the one time he did it to me, i brought them to him where he was rounding with his residents and said "your son needs a diaper change."

"oh, you do it," was the reply.

"not my job," i said. he wouldn't take the baby from me, so i handed him to one of the residents and left to do patient care. he never left his kids with me again.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

also, the remarks the doctor made - include them in your anonymous note that you send to the doctor himself, advising him of how immature, rude, disrespectful, and wrong he is to say such things and to teach them to his children. let him know, especially, that you are losing respect for him because of these cruel remarks. let him know that words hurt and ask if he really wants to teach his kids to be hurtful? i hope this doctor gets fat, lol. remember: you must do this anonymously. and you do have a perfect right to speak up, maybe even a responsibility.

if the doctor said anything like that to me, i'd take him to task for it right then and there. it seems to be the last bastion of "hate" to ridicule the obese. we can't get away with racial discrimination or discrimination based on gender, marital status or sexual preference, but it's ok to discriminate against the obese. he's a jerk! people should let him know they notice and disagree with him.

[janettalinda]

Ruby Vee,

I've never seen this anywhere-doctors rounding with their kids and expecting nurses to provide free child care in addition to their nursing duties. But I LOVED your response. You go girl. We need more nurses like you!

[jbp0529]

Well said, Ruby.

[Jo Dirt]

He needs to be more concerned with the butt on his shoulders.

[gentle]

as to the kids rounding with the mds - where in the world does this happen and is allowed? like i said, i'm a mid-level provider who works in a large nephrology practice and in the five hospitals where i am credentialed, i have never ever seen any md bring kids in to round. with vre and mrsa running rampant in our hospitals, who would want to chance exposing your precious children to these bugs?

i understand what you are saying about the vre and mrsa. we have politely suggested that one of our doctors obtain a nanny service because, that child was a toddler--doing the toddler thing. we, the staff members and myself, did so because we were concerned for his child's well being.

the practice of rounding with children is not uncommon. sometimes this is the only time they do get to see their kids and bond with them.

even with the "bugs," i won't take away their desire to spend time with their kids. and this is really what was happening, imho. although, this particular doc over stepped bounds with the "obesity" comment. he was trying to make the experience fun for his kids.

i guess, i was the kid who didn't see my mom enough unless, i went on-call with her to the hospitals. my mom wasn't a doc though. she worked in the lab, alone. if anything happened in the er, she had to go in. my mom had more call than any of the doctors i know. she was alone in that lab for a long time, too long for me but that's another story.

yeah, i was the kid who sat in the next room when she drew someone's blood. sometimes i was the kid in the same room with the patient and my mom. yes, i was the kid at the nurses' station or sitting in the er waiting for my mom. later, i learned that i was supporting my mom. i didn't know that at the time though.

later, i grew up to be the kid who helped get the paperwork done so the audits for the laboratory could be completed smoothly.

now, i am the nurse, whose husband brings the kids in to see her every sunday. i am the nurse, whose kids ask questions about the rooms and what is inside. like my mother, i now answer the questions as best as i can.

i've lived on both sides of this dialogue. the doctors, laboratory supervisors and everyone else who brings their kids to work with them are adults. they are responsible for making their own decisions. if there is a patient on the floor who has mrsa or vre, i do let the docs know before they get too far with the kids.

the point is, these people are trying to find a way to bond with their children in a manner that will build permanent good memories for them and their children. it is hard on the family to have one parent literally "owned" by a community of other people. i believe, everyone is doing the best they can.

if the doctor said anything like that to me, i'd take him to task for it right then and there. it seems to be the last bastion of "hate" to ridicule the obese. we can't get away with racial discrimination or discrimination based on gender, marital status or sexual preference, but it's ok to discriminate against the obese. he's a jerk! people should let him know they notice and disagree with him.

i do agree with you ruby. it is wrong to ridicule the obese or anyone for that matter. the statement was a poor choice, indeed.

[bagladyrn, RN]

I knew a doc who had a real weight prejudice. He was always being very negative to others about their weight. As a result, you could ruin his whole day by commenting "Hey Doc - have you put on a few pounds?". He'd spend the rest of the shift stepping on the scale and eating salad.

[gentle]

I think this situation has been made out to to be more important than it is (at least the part about rounding with kids). He can't bend over? The child might cry? These are pretty minor inconveniences that you're kind of magnifying into serious errors in judgement. One would assume that any college educated individual would be able to work out how to do an exam while wearing a baby backpack (eg - raise the bed).

I once knew a Pediatric Plastic Surgeon who would bring his 10 year old daughter to the ER when he got called to suture. She was as good at calming our scared little patients as Ketamine.

One of my son's pediatricians had a dad who was also a pediatrician. The father moved his practice to his garage for a while; so that, he could be closer to home while the kids were young.

Again, I've kinda lived on both sides. You know the feeling, sittin church and your mom's beeper goes off while she's playin the piano. Sittin in church and the phone rings in the office for your mom cause the battery in the beeper died.

Phone call comes at 1-2 in the morning, etc. I'm grateful for the days we have had together. I learned very little about medicine or lab stuff from my mom. I did learn dedication, commitment, and when to leave a situation though. In the end, these things have served me far better as a nurse, wife, mother, daughter, and friend.

[delvenia]

Maybe he was talking about his ex-wife . . . just kidding.

I have known a number of physicians who round with their children in tow, including one who would wear the "baby-backpack" and round with his sleeping infant. I don't think there is anything particularly wrong with this, nor is it prohibited by any law or regulation that I am aware of.

i dont think the problem is necessarily the children, but the comments made about "going to look at people with big butts." if i were a patient in the hospital and overheard that, i would be very offended. how do you know if you arent one of the people he is taking his kids to see? that's a terrible thing to teach a child....