O.K. I seriously think I'm burning out...

[Tweety]

I nearly had a meltdown last night. You don't have to read this, I'm just venting, but by talking about it now I can let go and move on. I'm off for two days. I'm moving to my new unit on Sunday and hopefully will be alright.

I come on at 6:45 and I'm in charge. We have no secretary, which is the normal. Phone is ringing off the hook, family members all lined up at the desk with questions, get through report. Call staffing "where is the agency nurse we were getting." Answer "we cancelled him in favor of another nurse and left a message on her maching" Me: "You cancelled a confirmed nurse and don't have confirmation on her replacement". "She'll be there, I'm sure". Day shift nurse wants to leave graciously stays but vents her anger at me. Call supervisor "Please, if I'm f*cked let me know right now, I'll take the patients and there will be no charge nurse for a while".

They send me an ICU that was in the ER to take care of ICU patients in my intermediate unit and I pull one of "my" nurses out. She literally cusses me out one side and down another. Seriously pissed, and I understand. Sorry. ICU nurse isn't happy either. Sorry.

Phone still ringing off the hook. Radiology transportor screams "I've been waiting for help with this patient and none of you want to help me". "I NEVER HEARD YOU ASK FOR HELP AND WE AREN'T SITTING AROUND DOING NOTHING!!!!!!!". Charge nurse helps tranporter.

Recovery room calls wanting bed they've been waiting on. I explain when the patient in their is discharged, as you already know. 15 minutes later recovery room "we're still waiting", me "yes patient is not through with her IV med, AS I SAID I WILL CALL YOU". 15 minutes later recovery room on the phone again "we've been waiting....blah blah blah" I literally scream in to the phone "STOP HARRASSING ME!!!!" and hang up on her. She calls back "Did you just hang up on me". Me "Yes, CLICK SLAM".

I'll spare you the rest, but it went on like this for a few more hours.

I took a deep breath. Walked to recovery room and apoligized in person for my behavior and that I was very sorry and wrong and she shouldn't have gotten the brunt of my anger. She said she talked to her coworkers who know me well, and got the felling it was not the real me and was willing to let it go. But at that point I wanted to beg her to write me up so I could get fired.

I've done this job for 10 years, I can do it. But I've never hung up on anyone in that kind of anger and frustration before. I'm famous for my serenity and it takes A LOT to get me frazzled.

Am I loosing it? Burning Out? Need a vacation? Need to get out of nursing? Shut up and quit my whining, you get paid to do this job? Sigh.

Thanks so much for those who made it this far.

[NurseDennie, BSN, RN]

Originally posted by 3rdShiftGuy

Call staffing "where is the agency nurse we were getting." Answer "we cancelled him in favor of another nurse and left a message on her maching" Me: "You cancelled a confirmed nurse and don't have confirmation on her replacement". "She'll be there, I'm sure".

I know this is a late response, in the scheme of things. But this part of it just KILLED me!! I'm sure the other nurse came in right on time, right?

"Duhhhhhh, staffing. That nurse has caller ID and an answering machine SPECIFICALLY to avoid talking to YOU on her days off!!!" Oh, I get to use that Rebecca quote: Staffing: clue phone. It's for you!

Love

Dennie

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

Originally posted by RNFROG3

I'm just curious though -your ER has ICU nurses? WOW what a concept. We just get the ICU charge to float down and make sure we aren't screwing up too badly when the ICU patients are on hold here in the ED

Critical care beds are hard to come in our hospital, primarily because we are a trauma center. Sometimes the neuro step down is used for overflow as a last resort because we have monitored beds there.

Often the critical patients are held in the ER with ICU nurses floating there to take care of specifically the critical patients on hold. That night they pulled a critical care nurse to float up to me and just made one of the ER nurses take care of the critical patients that nurse had.

It is such drama when we have "no shows". It amazes me lately that it seems to happen once or twice lately. People don't know they are working, claim their schedule was changed. Agency nurses sign up as available and then no show saying "I canceled myself". It's just maddening, because you have to shuffle nurses around and everyone gets angry.

[Marijke]

I think the sad part is that most of us know what it feels like to be working under those kind of circumstances.

Marijke

[HRHNurse Carol]

I would like to hear more about that book, what is it, the joys of burnout?? I don't think we get Nursing Times here. I could use that book, as I'm rather burned out at present also. Sorry 3rd shift guy- I can relate. You sound like a great guy to work with, like you give a darn. I'm glad you can reach out to us here at allnurses and share what is happening with you. I also am glad allnurses is here!!! By the way, about the ICU nurse in ER- I always thought I was supposed to know all that stuff, we never had help with our holding....We have always done it ourselves and I for one was always scared silly...I thought maybe it was a deficiency in me that I didn't know the ICU stuff. Fortunately I have always been able to find someone in the ER who did know ICU stuff.

[DIPLOMATICRN4HIRE, MSN, RN]

Walks up to 3rd shift , leans over lights my cigarette off his chard body, Honey you aint burnt out yet,* PUFF*, but you certainly light a cigerette. Take a mental time out, find a spot deep in the woods, and just scream your brains out and name names when you do it, Hon if you dont unload soon your gonna blow. Remember its not a job its a freaking adventure.... I often wonder have I died and gone to hell and this is hell? I look around and wonder is Satan an Administrator? Manager? or just the disruptive family member I want to jam a 14 guage needle in. Inhale , exhale, deep breathe and scream your brains out until all of that crap you been hanging on like "It will all get better soon", "They would never let Nurses get short staffed thats rediculous" , and my favorite" The customer is always right", let that crap fly out of your head. The values and the desires that you once had and that have been covered up by the political and overwhelming issues in the days now will come back. Just unload the 10 yrs of hanging by a thread go... You will feel like a new person.

Zoe

Screaming in California as we speak...

[Tookie]

Thirds Shift Guy - Ive not logged on for a while wondering how you are going - I will probably read it some where else - Hope your feeling more positive and happier.

Tookie

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

Zoe, what a great post!

Tookie, thanks for taking the time to check on me. I've moved on to a new unit. While it has it's own ups and downs and problems, that are similar elsewhere, it's a new place and I'm o.k. I've gotten good feedback from coworkers.

But we'll see. There a problematic CNA on 3-11 shift that I've gone to upper management about. I've decided to take a "I ain't taken no shit" type of attitude. Nip all my problems in a bud, make no friends if that's the ways it's gonna be. But I'm going to work for a positive team and not let one sour apple spoil the bunch. Take care of the patients!

I've scheduled a three-week break in April and have perked up thinking about that.

You guys have been fantastic. Thanks again!

[sjoe]

Meanwhile, go see the new movie "Chicago" a few times as well.

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

Originally posted by sjoe

Meanwhile, go see the new movie "Chicago" a few times as well.

You always confuse me.