In doubt

  1. Let me first say that I made the decision to be a nurse when I was 15. My mother was diagnosed with kidney failure and she is on dialysis. Not many years later,I got married and had a son. He was a street runner and never supportive of me. I enrolled in college to get my prereq's out of the way. That did not go so well. I wondered all of the time about my son or what female he had at our home,etc. I was abused emotionally and physically. I never got wanting to be a nurse out of my head. After he walked out on me and our son, I thought that my life was over. Little did I know that my life was just beginning. I moved to another state and got a job working in a factory. That is where I met my current husband. Soon after I got pregnant with our daughter. It was after the birth of my daughter did I realize that I needed to go back to school. I am in doubt because I have a 11 month old, a 5 year old and a 27 year old.( ). I know that it will be hard but I don't think that I can handle challenges very well. I love taking care of people. That is my passion. How do I get rid of that doubt? How do I challenge the obstacles that I think are hard? Even though my hubby is supportive, I am still afraid.
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  2. 13 Comments

  3. by   Tweety
    If you don't try you're going to regret it.

    Just walk through your doubts, because you can do this. There are going to be tough stressfull days that you're going to be at your wits end and doubt yourself. I doubted myself frequently and I was single without kids and lived at home with my parents.

    In other words, fear and doubt are common. We all feel that way at first. Just keep focused on your goal and take one step at a time.

    Good luck!
  4. by   TazziRN
    Is your husband supportive? Is he willing to help out with the kids? What about your oldest, will he help with the little ones? If the answer to these is Yes, there is nothing holding you back except yourself!
  5. by   rnmomtobe2010
    TazziRN,

    My oldest is my husband.lol!!! The 27 year old I was talking about. He can't handle them, but he said that by all means he will help because he knows that becoming a nurse has been my dream for 10 years. I just know that I will not be able to give the attention to my little ones like I do now. My 11 month old is very demanding and my son is a momma's boy.
  6. by   All_Smiles_RN
    My son was 18 months old when I started nursing school. I became pregnant again halfway through nursing school. My husband left for Iraq. It was a struggle everyday, but I did it! I have job security and know that I can provide for my children. I'm so happy I followed my dreams, even when I thought I should give up. I hope you too decide to follow your dreams.
  7. by   NeosynephRN
    You can totally do it!!! I have an 11 month old a almost 4 year old and a 5 and a half year old...not to mention my 35 year old My husband is very supportive and of course it has not always been easy and times have been hard. But you just push through and you will be just fine!! I graduate in May!!! YAY!!! Yes that means I had my youngest..right smack in the middle!!! You can do it...and you will not regret it when it is all said and done!!!
  8. by   tictac
    You can SO do this. Not only will you and your family be proud of your accomplishment, you will be providing a better life for your family in the end. My husband passed away and left me with 3 little ones, and I'm currently in nursing school. I'm sure your husband will be very helpful and supportive. Of course it will be challenging at times, but it will be worth it in the end. If you don't, you run the risk of forever feeling unfulfilled in your life. Being a mother may currently by the most important, but it's not the only role in life. Keep your eye on the prize and know that it will be worth it in the end.
  9. by   Jo Dirt
    Quote from calla2114
    You can totally do it!!! I have an 11 month old a almost 4 year old and a 5 and a half year old...not to mention my 35 year old My husband is very supportive and of course it has not always been easy and times have been hard. But you just push through and you will be just fine!! I graduate in May!!! YAY!!! Yes that means I had my youngest..right smack in the middle!!! You can do it...and you will not regret it when it is all said and done!!!
    I have one on the way, a 5 yr old, 8 yr old, 9 yr old and a 50 yr old. Sometimes, there really isn't a lot of difference between them.
    I got through LPN school with 2 little ones and RN school with 3 little ones. I wish I had held on and spent more time with them, because I will never get that back. You might not want to hit it so hard at first while the youngest is so little, but the old cliche where there's a will there's a way is definitely true. Just try to make sure your will doesn't get in the way of what's really important.
    Life isn't automatically a breeze when you finish nursing school and becoming an RN won't solve all your problems. I think my life was actually better as an LPN...but anyway...good luck in whatever you decide.
  10. by   morte
    i would look at this as a 5-6 year plan, at least.....get hubby up to speed on being a hands on parent.....get that five year old into outside activities (cut the apron strings, at least lengthen them,lol),....take a class the next couple of semesters.....if you are working, put all the money away that you can.... good luck
  11. by   rnmomtobe2010
    Thank you all for the wondeful responces. I am going to take the advice that was given to me. I know that it is going to be hard but I know that it will be well worth it. I don't know if my mother's health will fail her soon, but I would love to be able to take care of her. Even with her battle with kidney failure, my mother is a senior at the University of Memphis. That disease has not stopped her from fullfilling her dreams, so I guess that I can't allow these minor obstacles to stand in my way.


    Thank You all for the input!!!
  12. by   ertravelrn
    I know how you feel. My first husband was abusive and when I finally realized I needed to go get my adn, he was not supportive and told me how stupid I was. I was so afraid the first day that I hyperventilated before class. I just took each hour, one at a time. Made my self go when I wanted to run back home. As classes went on, I found that I was stronger than I ever knew. Going to college did several things for me. It helped me gain self confidence and allowed me to support myself and kids without someone elses financial help. My children were 5 and 6 when I started school.
    Good luck to you
  13. by   Medic/Nurse
    I have had a EASY time going to school, supportive spouse (although he got a a LOT of mileage out of the "mail order diploma" joke - now he laughs all the way to the bank! ) - but the DOUBT is just something inside of you! I think EVERYONE, no matter what, has struggled with that from time to time! I know that I have! And I know that negative self talk can defeat you faster than anything! So treat yourself with kindness and resolve to talk to yourself in a POSITIVE manner! It does work! Ban the doubt!

    I will admit that school (or any change) is tough. I think that the health careers are VERY TOUGH because it is LIFE that you are responsible for - and that makes it a bit overwhelming. Also, given the volumes of stuff we must master - well it adds to the DOUBT. Not everything has to be done at ONCE, take it slow, first things first.

    But, I offer you this -

    I have NEVER regretted ANYTHING I have ever done. I have REGRETTED many things I have NOT DONE. I know it is not easy, but the good things are not easy! But that makes them the most valued!

    It sounds like you have all the QUALITIES that make a GREAT NURSE! Your dream is still alive and you've already gotten you and your child OUT of a terrible situation (AND I CAN NOT THINK OF ANYTHING THAT WOULD TAKE MORE STRENGTH). So, now you struggle with doubt. I, however, have NO DOUBT that you have what it takes!

    Take one step at a time.
    It will not be easy, but others have done it - so be comforted. It is possible!

    I know the journey is long and it is not going to be easy - it never is!

    Perhaps you can look to area hospitals - most have positions that they offer OJT for and will pay for school in return for a work commitment from you! There is a problem called a nursing "shortage" - you may help be part of the solution.

    I wish you luck!
  14. by   rnmomtobe2010
    You all are so wonderful. It is nice to know that i have other angels out there supporing me.

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