If Read...Get Comfortable B/C Brownie Is On Her Soap Box..:)

  1. I awoke tonite ... unable to sleep any longer..so of course I came to check out the BB. I was even more awake...as I read the flaming thread, as I'm sure you all know ....still continues on...and
    suddenly I was saddened by it all...

    You all know...I have particiipated in some very lively discussions....no agruements....plain and simple! But they have always seemed to sooner or later fall by the way side...and everyone has just continued on. But this one refuses to die...and that saddened me.

    I went back...and I realized someting...that when Susy K...made a statement...that I thought was hurtful...because "I" thought she had made the comment on purpose...."I" was hurt by it....and "I" made a statement back to her to disprove what she had said about my possible not working in such a such place....and that was what "I" meant when I said "again your post doesn't hold water".... not her opinion about where she worked . But you know...in my hurt feelings...I didn't see or maybe "I" didn't wish to see...that she may have misunderstood what I was saying!

    You know someone on here posted ....that the problem with having discussions on the BB...is that it is difficult for one person to discern exactly what someone is meaning...or to detect an inflection of tone or feelings...because you can't see the other person's face ...expressions or body language to adequately judge what is meant by a term...or a word written on the screen.
    It makes it difficult to grasp the real meaning behind those words.

    I'm saddened by all that has transpired...because I have an overwhelming feeling, that if we were able to sit down together face to face...most of the misunderstanding....not all mind you....as we all still have different opinions and beliefs systems. But we would garner possibly a better understanding of each person's personality and achieve a clearer idea of whether or not someone is joking..sincere....or even hurt by a statement. We could look in their eyes and determine more...than trying to surmise true meanings by reading emoticons...bold type or capitalized letters.

    Many times when I read posts on this BB...I'm taken back by some of things I read.....but just as often I'm impressed by the knowledge ...the caring...the experience..and the dedication I see in those who chose to share who and what they are. Here on this BB ...many of us older.. and younger alike...are able to share and communicate with many across the country and around the world. I'm in awe so many times...that I have been given the opportunity to become imspired ....encouraged....and to have my emotions taken from joy to tears...to feelings of pride ..just by moving from thread to thread.

    But in the same light....I'm saddeded today...because I fear that hurts from unintended statements made in the heat of anger may threaten to keep us from truly sharing what we think and feel...because ...no matter how powerful this medium called the internet is....it has it's limitations. The limitations are that....no matter how hard we try to screen our words...this form of communication can never take the place of talking face to face. Yes there are some among us who are able to cross the divide and bridge the barrier that exists here....and impart so very well ...their inner most feelings,.....so artfully...that we all can relate. But that is the mark of a true commnicator....and this sadly I am not.

    In conclusion of my long winded post....I can only submit that it is my true desire that everyone who reads the posts presented here...will take into account...that although we all are very talented...intelligent .... humans beings...who seek out a way to impart their experiences...their concerns..their wisdom...their fears...and thier disappointments...I just wish ....we could all just try to embrace the fact....that we are not without error...fault....misunderstandings...but we are all care givers through and through.......and some may need a little more care and understanding......than others....including me!

    I respectfully submit....that I would love for all those hurts to be toss aside...and let us continues in the spirit of thouthful exchange....so we might be able to move pass this plateau to a higher existence...that is lined with acceptance...and not with disdain....no matter where our paths may lead us...

    Whew...I know...climbing dow...again..
    Last edit by Brownms46 on Mar 26, '02
    •  
  2. 15 Comments

  3. by   SICU Queen
    Let me get you a ladder. That was one HIGH UP soapbox!

    All of what you said was so true, though. Thanks for putting it in writing.
  4. by   hoolahan
    Brownie, that was beautifully said.
  5. by   nursedawn67
    Nicely done...
  6. by   RNPD
    "Yes there are some among us who are able to cross the divide and bridge the barrier that exists here....and impart so very well ...their inner most feelings,.....so artfully...that we all can relate. But that is the mark of a true commnicator....and this sadly I am not. "-Brownie

    You are so wrong here Brownie! You are an eloquent and intelligent communicator and have nothing to regret or apologize for. I shouldn't speak for SusyK, since you mentioned her name, but in my opinion, any miscommunication with you is cleared up quickly and respectfully. We all get angry and say things we later wish we didn't, or at least weren't so forceful about. I know I am sooo guilty of that sometimes. My mouth gets ahead of my brain when I get angry. But it is the mark of a truly great communicator to see when things go a little too far and to stop and clarify and soothe ruffled feathers. And that describes you, Brownie.

    So I hope your day is happy and peaceful and your sleep more restful tonight!
  7. by   Mary Dover
    Beautifully stated. In total agreement here. Maybe we all have mood changes from time to time, well I know at least I do. There are times that I am more easily upset, or that my feelings are more easily hurt than at other times. During these times, I have learned that for the sake of peace within myself - I MUST stop and reflect....think things through, before offering any response. I take pride in having learned as a nurse, just how CRITICAL communication is, and what works most effectively.
    It saddens me to see splitting among people who are ALL wonderful, caring individuals. I plan to continue striving to maintain neutrality on my part, although not always easy in a place like this, a place I have come to enjoy so much. I respect EVERYONE here, and have no intention of feeding into negative energy.
    Brownie, thanks for starting this thread. Hope you don't mind if I share your ladder for just a moment.
    Mary
    (just feeling the need to express)
  8. by   SKM-NURSIEPOOH
    I totally agree with you Brownie...all of us on these BBs need to communicate our comments, ideas, & opinions with dignity & respect. If we could stop to take-in the message that we're reading & throughly THINK ABOUT WHAT IS BEING SAID instead of reacting emotionally as a reply, then we can learn to listen & understand where each of us are coming from. As I've stated before, we are all intelligent, talented, vocal nurses who all enjoy our professions as evident by all of the participation on these BBs.
    Last edit by SKM-NURSIEPOOH on Mar 26, '02
  9. by   micro
    Brownie.......
    No, have to agree.....you are an excellent communicator.......and soapbox anytime........

    now to add a bit of levity.....cause I can.....(thanks to people like brownie)

    could you all imagine all of us in one big convention center meeting for the first time and Brian the keynote speaker up there saying see how far we have all come and what we can accomplish when we communicate beyond just ourselves.....and our own little world and and walls.........

    I can IMAGINE that and wish that I could meet many many of you face to face........but never say never.....

    but you know the other nice thing.......this is a brave new world we are in and we are learning a whole new art of communicating here.........
    on another thread.........those old dirt roads....oh, so right.........
    but time moves on.............let's just hope we keep some dirt roads around literally and figuratively...........cause it is the human in all of us that will make or break this world.........

    brownie.....
    you got a book in your heart also.....
    soapbox anytime.............

    love to all,
    micro here and there
  10. by   live4today
    Right on, micro! You always bring a smile to my heart when I read your post!
  11. by   semstr
    wowwowowowowowow,

    If I had one, CHAPEAU!!!
    Beautiful said, take care, Renee
  12. by   Q.
    Brownie,

    What a nice thread and I agree. It is hard to express things, even verbally, so written material is even harder. I try very hard to select my words carefully for that very reason.


    On a different note, I couldn't help but notice that Renee changed her username to Cheerfuldoer. Why? I was so confused for a bit because some threads list Renee Williams as the last poster, but then she wasn't there and it was Cheerfuldoer instead. I only figured it out because I noticed ALL the posts were changed, and the ones that I KNOW were Renee are now Cheerfuldoer.

    Please, I get confused easily.
  13. by   Brownms46
    I am awake now...for real this time...and I can only say....that I'm warmed...and deeply touch by the sentiments of all who chose to share this soap box with me. You have all made me feel better just by being caring enough to have an open mind....and willing to allow me to speak to you all from my heart.

    A last..... I can take no credit for being any kind of communicator....as my skills in that arena are spotty at best..
    though I'm truly honored by the expressions of such....... by those I hold in very high regard. I just hope that those who were touched by my sincere confessions here...will have the compassion..... the next time I go off on a tangent......to pull my ears back... and stop me in my tracks...:chuckle

    Thank you all....as you have been a blessing to my spirit...and RNPD....I know I will rest well tonite....because I see there is forgiveness no matter how many badly I messed up... To ALL
  14. by   Brownms46
    Thank you Susy K for taking time to read this...and for your kind understanding... In the future....I will try to do my best as others have stated..... to not be so quick to judge, ... what another may or may not be trying to express. And I thank you for being willing to give me that chance..

    As for why Renee's username has been changed...I respectfully say...that I must allow her to explain...and relay that information to you
    Last edit by Brownms46 on Mar 26, '02

close