I think I learned something today

  1. I'm not a really holy person, but a really amazing thing happened to me today. While I was calculating the amount of my first paycheck and thinking how good things were going to be from now on...the following old memory popped into my head: about 9 1/2 years ago there was a woman in front of me making a purchase with food stamps. She had a small boy with her. She made a really, really big fuss with the cashier about TOILET PAPER not being a covered item. I thought to myself get a job, lazy, then you can afford toilet paper. The cashier and I said some pretty nasty things about the 'lazy welfare people' and how we'd rather work then get free money. I knew the woman heard, and I really didn't care. Sometime after that my husband lost his job and couldn't find work for 8 months. To make matters worse I was pregnantwith my third child with no health coverage. OMG the horror...I became a "welfare mom"! Neither one of us could find work for a while and we had to rely on Focus Hope for food. I had to endure the comments now, and they really hurt me. I felt so worthless, ashamed, and frowned upon. Even when my husband found work it was less than 1/2 what we were used to, and I occassionally had to go to a local church for food and TOILET PAPER (without it we had to use...never mind use your imagination). The comments I heard while receiving assistance...if you're so poor why are you having another child you should get an abortion it's cheaper, get a job, if you can't buy food...how come you're fat. Well...I was blessed three years ago with the opportunity to get my ADN-RN. Which brings me to the beginning of this post and the opportunities that my family will now have. Strange how that woman popped up in my head today, three days before my first payday. I think God helped me learn something today. I wonder if that woman is doing all right for herself now. I wonder if she was lucky enough to catch a break like I finally did. I hope God never lets me forget this simple lesson of happiness home, dinner, and TOILET PAPER. I think I owe Focus Hope and the local church a tithe! Thank you, God!
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  2. 9 Comments

  3. by   Tweety
    Sounds like you've learned a llittle humility the hard way. I never forget the old saying "but for the Grace of God go I".....You know what you should do? You should donate toilet paper to shelters, churches, etc.

    Sometimes lifes tough lessons give us insight. Sounds like you're full of gratitude. How refreshing that is and thanks for sharing.
  4. by   heatherbless
    Quote from vhope
    I'm not a really holy person, but a really amazing thing happened to me today. While I was calculating the amount of my first paycheck and thinking how good things were going to be from now on...the following old memory popped into my head: about 9 1/2 years ago there was a woman in front of me making a purchase with food stamps. She had a small boy with her. She made a really, really big fuss with the cashier about TOILET PAPER not being a covered item. I thought to myself get a job, lazy, then you can afford toilet paper. The cashier and I said some pretty nasty things about the 'lazy welfare people' and how we'd rather work then get free money. I knew the woman heard, and I really didn't care. Sometime after that my husband lost his job and couldn't find work for 8 months. To make matters worse I was pregnantwith my third child with no health coverage. OMG the horror...I became a "welfare mom"! Neither one of us could find work for a while and we had to rely on Focus Hope for food. I had to endure the comments now, and they really hurt me. I felt so worthless, ashamed, and frowned upon. Even when my husband found work it was less than 1/2 what we were used to, and I occassionally had to go to a local church for food and TOILET PAPER (without it we had to use...never mind use your imagination). The comments I heard while receiving assistance...if you're so poor why are you having another child you should get an abortion it's cheaper, get a job, if you can't buy food...how come you're fat. Well...I was blessed three years ago with the opportunity to get my ADN-RN. Which brings me to the beginning of this post and the opportunities that my family will now have. Strange how that woman popped up in my head today, three days before my first payday. I think God helped me learn something today. I wonder if that woman is doing all right for herself now. I wonder if she was lucky enough to catch a break like I finally did. I hope God never lets me forget this simple lesson of happiness home, dinner, and TOILET PAPER. I think I owe Focus Hope and the local church a tithe! Thank you, God!
    you know what--you had a very good point and post there. I also at one time had to get foodstamps and I did not feek guilty at all, not one bit! There have been times that I have actually been unemployed with a masters degree and here, I went to school about my whole adult young life--so, I am with you in understanding....I am now back in school for my BSN because the job market was so bad. if people judge you, that's on them. I remember that I used to go to the grocery store in the middle of the night--so, I would not hold up the line. But, you do the best that you can. The only fault period--IS JUST GIVING UP AND NOT TRYING! MORE POWER TO YOU GIRL, YOU ARE AWESOME FOR FINISHING YOUR ADN AND KEEPING ON, I AM PROUD OF YOU!

    BEST, HTY.
  5. by   hock1
    Quote from 3rdShiftGuy
    Sounds like you've learned a llittle humility the hard way. I never forget the old saying "but for the Grace of God go I".....You know what you should do? You should donate toilet paper to shelters, churches, etc.

    Sometimes lifes tough lessons give us insight. Sounds like you're full of gratitude. How refreshing that is and thanks for sharing.
    3rdshiftguy you are brilliant! If anybody has a shelter, church that helps the needy and you are inspired then donate toilet paper, toothpaste, soap for the nameless woman. People are very greatful for these luxurious items.
    Last edit by hock1 on Mar 10, '04
  6. by   Tweety
    Quote from vhope
    3rdshiftguy you are brilliant! If anybody has a shelter, church that helps the needy and you are inspired then donate toilet paper, toothpaste, soap for the nameless woman. People are very greatful for these luxurious items.

    One wouldn't think of toilet paper as a luxurious item.....until you don't have any that is.
  7. by   gwenith
    Sometimes - it is the little things that make a difference. I know a lot of people who do not like giving money to charity organisations "because it all goes to the fat cat organisers anyway" but little everyday things like toilet paper shampoo nice soap can make someone feel so much better.
  8. by   TinyNurse
    Great post VHope! Congrats on getting your first nursing paycheck in a few days!! Never forget where you came from. xoxo Jenni
  9. by   SmilingBluEyes
    beautiful thoughts...great thread. i agree w/tiny. never forget where you came from....and know where you are going. best wishes to you.
  10. by   gypsyatheart
    I'm really impressed with your post. I also try to remind myself "There but for the grace of God go I...." Because that is so very true! I remind myself ever day and thank God every day for my blessings.
  11. by   traumaRUs
    What a nice post. I too learned a lesson in humility a few years ago. I had always been quite self-righteous and cynical when it came to raising teens and having them get into trouble. Well - let me say - my younger son's adolsecence was rife with tension, many, many issues and many harsh consequences. Now, when I see other teens out of control - I pray for their parents that they will find something to get their child turned around. A very sobering experience.

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