I have a Dillema - page 2

I am in my senior year in a BSN program. I am holding my own, but have a family dillema that is pressing. My elderly Aunt, who has been a Nurse since WWII has been suffering from advanced bone cancer... Read More

  1. by   Pompom
    I believe that your Aunt is proud of you and following her wishes to finish your degree would make her very happy. Although it is hard on you, continuing with your education is what is best. Good luck to you.
  2. by   nursemary9
    Quote from Otessa
    Your Aunt has stated that what she desires most from you is to see you graduate.


    Please LISTEN to your Aunt-the greatest joy you can give her right now is to NOT change what you are doing--continue with your education and KNOW that it is her greatest wish.

    I totally agree!!
    Your Aunt has told you what she wants from you.

    Please, please, grant her the wish!! Make her feel proud!!

    My thoughts and prayers to you, your family and your Dear Aunt, who sounds like a very dear Lady!!

    I hope you will share with us how things go for you all.

    Mary Ann
  3. by   purplemania
    Not only should you graduate but you can make her proud by being the best nurse you can. Let her know how she has inspired you and how you want to dedicate your career to her. That would be a great LIVING memorial for anyone.

    My regards to you and your family.
  4. by   pyrolady
    I am so sorry to hear of you aunt's health. I feel you can honor her most by doing what one of her last wishes is....graduate. Complete your studies, hopefully she will still be here to watch you accomplish your goal. I think sm2l821 had the right idea....be the case manager for her so that you are able to make sure she has the kind of care you feel is best for her. Stop by to see her as much as possible and keep her in the loop about all of your studies and life. People who are getting ready to pass into the next life still like to feel like they are part of this one. Your stories will keep her happy and content knowing you are finishing school and her legacy to you will be that you will continue on her work of helping others. God bless, keep us posted.
  5. by   charebec65
    Royr,

    My heart goes out to you and I've said a little prayer for you both. I agree with the others. It sounds as if your aunt's wish is to see you graduate, for you to finish your studies.....

    You seem to be a very compassionate and loving person. You will be an awesome nurse. Someone has a great idea.....become your aunt's 'case manager' for her. You can coordinate her care, work on your degree and have quality time with her.
  6. by   royr
    Quote from charebec65
    Royr,

    My heart goes out to you and I've said a little prayer for you both. I agree with the others. It sounds as if your aunt's wish is to see you graduate, for you to finish your studies.....

    You seem to be a very compassionate and loving person. You will be an awesome nurse. Someone has a great idea.....become your aunt's 'case manager' for her. You can coordinate her care, work on your degree and have quality time with her.
    Follow up to my original post - I came home late last night after a 7 hour round trip drive to meet with my Aunt and my sister. We went over everything together and worked out a plan of action. My older sister has been an RN for many years and has insisted that since she is closer and has more experience that she will handle the case manager tasks - which made my Aunt visisbly happy. It seems that both of them wish to unburden me from any other concerns while I attempt to finish my BSN program in May and sit for my NCLEX. My Aunt really wants to see me graduate and get my licence while she is still here and stated that although her Dr projected she had 3 months or so left to be with us in this life - she was going to be at my graduaton in May and that is the way of it. She then told us the story of her grandmother who was a nurse until she passed in 1893 - and gave my sister the nursing watch that had been passed on to her in the family tradition. She spelled out her wishes in great detail - it was like watching a pilot perform a pre flight safety check before lift off. She closed by kissing me on the cheek and telling me "one nurse out - one nurse in - we have always had a nurse in the family - try to see to it that we always will". I know exactly now what I need to do. Thank you all for helping me explore my options with this dillema - and God bless you all.
  7. by   maryshome8
    My mother died at home and she died on a Sunday. I was visiting with my parents the week before and throughout the weekend because she went into the hospital the previous Monday and I came home the next day from out of state.

    I knew when I left on Sunday to return home I would never see her again...she just had that look on her face. I told her to rest and she looked at me and said, "It's hard to go to sleep when you are afraid every time you lay down that you'll never wake back up again."

    That broke me heart.

    She made me leave that day around 1:00 in the afternoon because if I left any later she would worry that I was driving at night and stay up. My father told me to leave as well, and I thought I would never make it out of the house without crying.

    My point is: She will feel better with you going to school and concentrating on your work...it will actually add to her stress level if you are constantly with her because she will feel that she is causing you to miss out on valuable study time and may ultimately be the cause if you miss out on graduation...I know you WANT to be there..but SHE wants you in school.

    So....stay at school.
  8. by   charebec65
    Quote from royr
    follow up to my original post - i came home late last night after a 7 hour round trip drive to meet with my aunt and my sister. we went over everything together and worked out a plan of action.... which made my aunt visisbly happy. it seems that both of them wish to unburden me from any other concerns while i attempt to finish my bsn program.....

    it's wonderful that you have worked out a plan in which you can continue and finish your education, your aunt will have quality care and you two can spend quality time together.....

    my aunt really wants to see me graduate ... while she is still here....

    even if her body tires before you finish your program, you will have made her very happy and very proud..... she will always be with you regardless.
    i wish you the best....

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