HR recruiter sending me friend request on FB??

Nurses General Nursing

Published

Hello to all,

I'm in a situation and I'm not sure what to do. I recently interviewed for a job at a local hospital and got the job. I'm scheduled for orientation on April 14. My problem is that today I got a friend request from the HR recruiter with whom I had my initial phone interview. I'm not sure what's her motive her for wanting to have me as a friend on facebook. They ran a background check on me so I'm not sure what more they want to know.I want to deny her request but I'm not sure if Facebook will send her a message telling her I denied her request. I don't have nothing to hide but I prefer to keep my social life separate from my professional life. Can you guys give me some tips as to how I should handle this situation.

Thanks

Specializes in LTC.

FB will not tell her you denied the request. you can do something called "Blocking" her, where she will never be able to find your profile again. and FB doesn't report any of this. It's like you just disappear. You block someone by going to their profile, and going to the lower left hand corner, it should say a block/report this person. just click the 'block' pop up and no one will be reported, she just wont be able to find you on FB anymore. :)

Btw, i think its really inappropriate what she is doing. that is like knocking at your front door expecting to be let in so she can snoop around.

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Click Report/Block, and you will get this pop-up

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then just block her! :)

Specializes in OB, ER.

I would respond simply saying you like to keep your personal and work life separate. That is inappropriate on her end and I can only imagine would be used to spy on you!

Specializes in Pysch, Corrections, MedSurg.

Yeah, FB won't tell her that you "denied" her request. I agree with above poster. You should block her so that she cannot find your FB. To request you as a "friend" and she doesn't know you, sounds fishy to me. Something is "off" here, at least that what I think. Just use caution and good luck in your new position!!

Wow-she may be checking you out a little more to make sure you're a good fit for them , she may just really like you and want to get to know you better to become a friend , she may be one of those that's goal is to get as many "friends" as possible. My guess is she's just wanting to check you out a little more and your privacy settings are preventing her from doing that. If I were you I would not accept her as a friend. I'm like you-want to keep my personal life private and you don't want her finding something to use against you even if you don't have anything to hide . Facebook will not send anything telling her she was denied although she'll probably figure it out after a while when she doesn't get a confirmation. If she asks you can always play dumb and say you hardly get on facebook, use it only to keep in touch with family, or only confirm very close friends, etc. Congrats on your new job!

Wow, that is really something!! I would not accept it. Just block/deny her request, she is trying to do something cricket. I also to think that is very inappropriate of her. Geezzz!!:redlight:

So glad I don't do facebook.

Couldn't you just email her and tell her that you would hate to "friend" her, because you just don't have much time/interest to do facebook anymore and wouldn't want her to think you were ignoring her. Or, just call her.

Since she is a recruiter, I imagine that she is just keeping her network large. But I also think it is valid for you to be able to keep your work and personal life separate. If you wanted to keep contact with her somehow, you could set up a profile on another networking site that you use for only work things.

Specializes in MSP, Informatics.

interesting article I read today http://techdailydose.nationaljournal.com/2011/03/blocking-social-websites-at-wo.php

It has long been known that people checking you out for employment have used google to find out more info on you. That often leads to social network sites. If yours is an open public site, they may find out way more than you would have told them. Always lock down your site to just friends. I have friended people before, then used the other FB filters to make sure they don't see thinks that are truely for my friends. You can put work people into a work people group, and when you post or post pictures, have them excluded. It isn't hard. I have people in several groups. Some groups must think I don't post much and am very boring. They just don't see the majority of my activity.

Specializes in Hospice.

I worked briefly for an employer who came right out and told staff that their facebook pages were going to be monitored as a condition of employment. It was a correctional setting, so the security issues were intense.

I wouldn't be surprised to find out that it is unofficial HR practice to friend as many people as you can. It helps them keep tabs on what's happening and spot trouble and/or trouble-makers early on.

I doubt that it's illegal, so we just need to be careful. Search the site with the keyword "facebook" and I'll bet you'll get an eyeful. People get fired for stuff on there.

I don't have specific advice as to how OP should handle her own situation. If it was me, I'd try to talk to the HR person face to face, explain that I don't "friend" anyone in the workplace because of confidentiality issues. At that point, she may try to pressure you, perhaps with a big show of "hurt feelings" and a lecture about the "team" that's really a family. That's when you can be sure that Big Brother is watching.

I wouldn't block her or ignore her or add her as a friend. Just let the request sit there...some people rarely check their facebook accounts....she may assume you are one of them. Just make sure everything is private so only your friends can see. Once you get the job you can do whatever.

Specializes in Women's Health.

ignore the friend request....... she won't know why, if you run into to her and she asks, act surprised and say something like "I must have missed it"

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