Has anyone switched from a BSN program to an ADN? - page 2

My daughter wants to be a nurse. We are encouraging her to go through an ADN program only because that way she can live at home without having to worry about where her next meal is coming from. (She... Read More

  1. by   Schatzi RN CEN
    I graduated from the last diploma program in nebraska, which puts me somewhat in the same categorie as your daughter will be in, if she decided to go for ADN, and that is WITHOUT a BSN degree. I now have a family, and I have a great income, but with a family depending on my income, I have not been able to return to school to get my BSN. I would love to go into nursing management, but for now that avenue is impossible without a BSN degree. If I could do it over, I would go for the BSN to start with, while I was without familial obligations. This may be a different viewpoint for you.
  2. by   TazziRN
    I have nothing against her getting a BSN, believe me. I would proud of her. But she has a tendency to quit trying if she fails at something for whatever reason, even if there is another route to try. That's why I don't think she would make it. Financially she would fail, and she would not be willing to start over to try again.
  3. by   casi
    Have you tried calling up the community college you want her to go to and asked if they’d take transfer credits from the BSN nursing program? Chances are though, if she’s not going to make it in a 4year school it will start with pre-reqs instead of nursing school.

    I will say this though as someone who is younger and has been through the college drop out thing. The BEST thing my mother let me do was let me make my own mistakes and find myself. I jumped into college right away. She didn’t believe I could do it and told me so on more than one occasion, and I wasn’t able to do it. I wasn’t ready yet. The year I dropped out I found myself learned I hated retail, became a CNA and found my niche in the world and have been able to go back to school and do good. I’ve gotten the chance to prove my mother wrong that I am able to go to college and not fail miserably.

    Do I regret dropping out for a year? Somewhat. I have trouble with the fact that I’m 22, still living with my parents, and just applying to nursing school when everyone in my age group is graduating, getting married, and pushing out babies. But this was MY decision and I can change it as I please.

    What I don’t regret is that I’ve found myself and I know what I want to do with my life. I’ve learned financial responsibility by working through school, paying my own bills, paying my parents rent, and helping out with other household bills when I can. How can one grow up if they aren’t given the chance to learn from their own mistakes?

    I guess I’m trying to pretty much say the same thing as Wendy did. You have to let her go out on her own and learn her own lessons. If she fails she fails, as a parent if you’re willing you can be there to catch her and guide her once she’s ready to be guided.

    Let her apply to the schools she wants. You don’t even know if she’s gotten in yet. Push her to apply to more than one just incase she doesn’t get in. Getting rejected from the college of your choice is apart of growing up. Changing your mind on major or route you take to that major is apart of growing up too. Parents can’t hold their kids hands forever.

    I hope I’m making some sense, just got off a night shift. :selfbonk:
  4. by   Tweety
    Quote from TazziRN
    I have nothing against her getting a BSN, believe me. I would proud of her. But she has a tendency to quit trying if she fails at something for whatever reason, even if there is another route to try. That's why I don't think she would make it. Financially she would fail, and she would not be willing to start over to try again.

    You know your daughter, and it doesn't sound like you have confidence in her at all. That's o.k. and you're more than likely right, as parents most often are.

    But sometimes, you have to let them jump into the deep end and fail. You can offer her the most sensible, easier softer way, but if she doesn't take it, all you can do is let her go.

    If you know she'll fail, then don't invest your money in the BSN. Or tell her, if she makes it the first year, then you'll think about helping her. This way you're not investing in her failure.

    Obviously what your proposing is the best for your daughter, parents usually know what's best for their kids.

    I learned some very bitter lessons the hard way when I failed in college my first attempt fresh out of high school. My parents were bitterly disappointed as well. They might have seen it coming but they let me make my own mistakes without bailing me out.

    Hopefully your daughter will see what's the best thing to do.

    Quote from TazziRN
    (To let her go straight from high school to a BSN program without the support of her family and her home would be like throwing her in the deep end.
    Sometimes that's the toughest job about being a parent, but sometimes that's exactly what you have to do.
    Last edit by Tweety on Oct 21, '06
  5. by   ICRN2008
    The best thing my mother ever did was support me in my desire to go away to school. I had to take out loans and do work study, but I wouldn't have had it any other way. Most kids at that age need to get out and experience life, including falling flat on their faces from time to time. It is the only way that they will grow and mature.

    My brother enrolled in a four-year college for a year and a half. He then decided that he wanted to quit, and his parents (though not happy about it) were supportive of his decision to take a half-year off. He is now moved out of the house and working on an A.S. degree in computers and doing very well. It turns out that the motivation had to come from HIM, because all the pushing and nagging in the world could not convince him to follow through on something (a four-year degree) that he really wasn't interested in.

    Your daughter may indeed make mistakes. It may be that she is not ready for college until she is 25 or 30. However, as much as parents want to protect their children, you cannot live her life for her or protect her from what might happen. Sometimes we succeed when everyone around us doubts us, and sometimes in our failures we learn more than we ever could have if we had taken the easy road.

    -From the perspective of a 26 year-old
  6. by   SummerGarden
    Quote from TazziRN
    I have nothing against her getting a BSN, believe me. I would proud of her. But she has a tendency to quit trying if she fails at something for whatever reason, even if there is another route to try. That's why I don't think she would make it. Financially she would fail, and she would not be willing to start over to try again.
    If you know this about her character, then you are probably correct. She probably will not make it in a BSN program. However, she probably will definitely not make it in an ADN program either. ADN programs are not easy!!! Friends or no friends, your daughter probably is too immature to be successful in any nursing school at this time.

    I have to agree with the others. If she is the one who is going to be paying, then let her go to the BSN program and sadly let her fall on her face.

    I know you are her mother and you do not want to see her mess up, however, that is how people GROW UP! She may fail and not return now, but who is to say she will not do so 10 years from now when she has matured??? Or who is to say she will not change her major and find something more suitable??

    Honestly, parents trying to stop their grown kids from making their own decisions and having to LIVE with the consequences that will not kill them, is not a good thing. No body ever grew up by taking advice. We all grew up from experiencing life.

    She will learn nothing from you or her Dad if she is not listening. And believe me right now she is not listening!
    She wants to move out, like many of us at her age!

    Once she falls on her butt, be there to comfort her and encourage her to get back up. Do not say "I told you so". Instead watch her grow stronger from the experience. If that mistake is not her wake up call, then she will fall again until she grows up. That is how life works. :spin: Good luck.
  7. by   BonnieSc
    I agree with those who have said that if she isn't going to make it at a "4-year" school, she'll know during the first two years of prereqs and it'll be easy to transfer then. I do think it would be difficult to transfer clinical nursing courses; if nothing else, they often go in a different order. Perhaps (if this all goes as she plans) after she finishes her prereqs would be a good time to revisit the issue.

    I certainly stand by the statement that she will be able to pay off any student loans pretty easily after she gets her RN. My student loan payments (from my BA, actually) are about $200 a month. Also, many hospitals have loan forgiveness programs.

    Sorry I had trouble saying all this diplomatically; thanks to those who did...
  8. by   Multicollinearity
    This thread makes me think of how different families have different 'automatic' college choices. I think it is dependent upon what they know from their own personal experience. One side of my family turned up their noses at my choice to do my first 2 years at community college due to the cost. This is because they ALL went to 4 year universities. They don't know or appreciate community colleges. The other side of my family is miffed that I'm going to transfer to a university for a BSN rather than go the ADN route. This is because they all went to community college and they don't personally know or appreciate universities. Also 2 family members on this side are retired LPN's and they feel threatened or inadequate regarding the BSN degree. Note, I am speaking of my own family. I find it interesting how some families automatically choose one educational route and the other is unthinkable. And vice-versa.

    Some thoughts about the OP's daughter. I hope she has applied for financial aid at both schools. You might be surprised at how well the finances of the university work out. You don't know if you don't apply. She could live in the dorm her first year. Freshman students living in dorms aren't exactly living on their own. They do have quite a few rules. I think dorm living could be an excellent transition from living at home to being on her own. That is what it is supposed to be.

    Tazzi, the following are rhetorical questions. Meaning, they are personal, so no need to respond here. People tend to stear their children towards the education they personally have themselves. Simply because they don't 'know' the other avenue. You got a bit defensive about saying you aren't sabotoging her. You also reacted strongly at the statement that someone with a BSN could pay off student loans well. It does sound quite possible that there is an element of ADN v. BSN tension here. Maybe something to think about. If not, then just discard this.

    Young students can surpise us. My cousin went off to a big university. His mother and father were sick with worry that he would screw up and waste all his money (think loans!) because he had demonstrated some irresponsibility in the past. After his first semester his grades were so low that he was put on academic probation. Well! He rose to the occasion and kicked into high gear. He ended up graduating Summa Cum Laude in three short years! He then went on to law school. He's a successful lawyer today. It still boggles everyone's mind a bit because he was such a screw up in high school. This is just one example of a young student surprising everyone. I have more examples of this very scenerio in my family.

    Good luck with what your daughter decides.
  9. by   TazziRN
    WAAAAIT!! *screeching halt*

    Okay, I need to clarify again.......my daughter has the brains to succeed in a BSN program. That is not my concern. She's bright and wants to learn. It's her FINANCIAL status we are concerned with!! If she goes to a BSN program she will have to live on her own and she would not be able to afford it. If she lives at home at least she would not have to worry about rent and food and utilities, etc. Her schooling we and her grandparents would help her with. It's her SURVIVAL we are worried about.

    Wendy, I know she would be able to pay off loans as an RN. The previous poster that I responded to said that with a BSN she would be able to pay them off, and it sounded like she was saying it's not possible or harder with an ADN.

    Tweety, thank you!
  10. by   TazziRN
    Quote from multicollinarity
    Tazzi, the following are rhetorical questions. Meaning, they are personal, so no need to respond here. People tend to stear their children towards the education they personally have themselves. Simply because they don't 'know' the other avenue. You got a bit defensive about saying you aren't sabotoging her. You also reacted strongly at the statement that someone with a BSN could pay off student loans well. It does sound quite possible that there is an element of ADN v. BSN tension here. Maybe something to think about. If not, then just discard this.
    I understand what you're saying, Multi. I got defensive about the sabotaging statement because that poster brought out the mental picture of me telling my daughter she can't do it. I was saying that it's not sabotage if I'm talking with my husband or anyone else but my daughter about this.

    And yes, I am an ADN, but I would be so proud of her for getting her BSN. I took offense at the statement about her being more than able to pay off loans with a BSN because it sounded like ADN's can't or have a harder time.

    Paying for school is NOT the issue. That's where my husband and I and her grandparents come in. Her surviving is. See my post above. And I suggested staying in the dorm but she and her friend are dead set against this.

    Look, guys. I want my daughter to succeed. I have absolutely nothing against her getting a BSN or going away to school (the school she is thinking about is not far away, just too far for her to commute). I just know that if she goes this route she will not make it. Not because she isn't smart enough or mature enough-----what 17-yr-old is mature?------but because she won't have the financial resources to live.

    She and her dad sat down last night and crunched numbers. In order to do this the way she wants to, she would have to be earning a minimum of $15 an hour. There is no way that a 17-yr-old is going to find that kind of job, not fresh out of high school. If you want to think that by making that statement, I'm sabotaging her, then so be it.
  11. by   RN4NICU
    Quote from TazziRN
    WAAAAIT!! *screeching halt*

    Okay, I need to clarify again.......my daughter has the brains to succeed in a BSN program. That is not my concern. She's bright and wants to learn. It's her FINANCIAL status we are concerned with!! If she goes to a BSN program she will have to live on her own and she would not be able to afford it. If she lives at home at least she would not have to worry about rent and food and utilities, etc. Her schooling we and her grandparents would help her with. It's her SURVIVAL we are worried about.

    Wendy, I know she would be able to pay off loans as an RN. The previous poster that I responded to said that with a BSN she would be able to pay them off, and it sounded like she was saying it's not possible or harder with an ADN.

    Tweety, thank you!
    Would it be possible for her to live in campus housing, where utilities, internet connection, meal plan, etc. are part of the housing cost? That option often works out to cost less than living in an off-campus apartment and paying for utilities, phone, groceries, cable, gas to drive to campus, parking, and other expenses associated with being out on your own.
  12. by   sunnyjohn
    Tazzi,

    I hear what you are saying. Here is my story.

    I was a briliant kid. Not tooting my own horn, but by the time I graduated high school I had a slew of O levels, A levels and 27 hours of college credit.

    Off I went to college. I did well the first year. Then things got hairy. I kinda lost my head. What should have taken me three years took me 6.5.

    At the end of year 3, mom and dad cut support back to 3/4 tuition only. At the end of year 4 they stopped entirely. I had always worked, but now I had to work enough to cover rent, food, gas, utilities AND TUITION.

    Mind you, I think I have the best parents God ever made, but even they realized it was time.

    At 33 I can honestly say, I wish they had made me pay for more of my own education from DAY ONE. Weird, but I really think I would have benefitted from being cut off sooner. Even my mum says how much I flourished when they let me go.

    I was never irresponsible, but I learned SO much from having to take care of things. I was a better student when I had to work and study. You really become adept at time management when you have to wait tables and study for a Organic Chem final! No more sleeping in the afternoons like most college kids. And yes, even with work, I could still enjoy myself.

    If she wants o go to a four year school, let her. Be honest and upfront with her about how much and for how long you will provide support. Let her know that nursing school is an all out slug fest and you wish to ease the pain. If your rule is low grades=less financial support, tell her that. Call a family meeting, spell it out, put it in writing and have everyone sign it.


    You are a good parent for wanting to watch her back. You have even greater insight as you know what a bear nursing school will be. Let her know that nursing school is a 12-round slug fest and you wish to soften some of those blows.

    Still that four-year college experience AWAY from home is something I would never have traded for any amount of security at a community college at home.
    Last edit by sunnyjohn on Oct 21, '06
  13. by   sunnyjohn
    One more thing,

    During those 6.5 years in college (the first time, lol) I studied formally in classrooms in four countries. I visited Japan, Malaysia, Singapore, Australia, Chile, Argentina, Brazil, Veneuela, Costa Rica, Belize, Nigeria, Kenya, Malawi, Mozambique, South Africa and Cote' d Ivorie. I toured Europe twice. I travelled the entire US. I studied Indian culture on various Native American reservation. I visited Civil War battle sites and dug around with famous historians. I dug for dinosaurs, released wolves back into the wild with famous zoologists and did research with famous immunologists at the CDC and NHA. I interned at a well-known brokerage firm and even did a political internship up in DC.

    My parents NEVER paid for the trips, even when they were paying tuition. I paid for all that waiting tables (in a family resturant- no HOOTERS for me, lol). I eventually graduated with a triple major, cum Laude.

    She can make the $15/hr to support herself. If she doesn't she will quickly figure out your way is better and move into the dorms or back home to finish up. Either way, she will have lost nothing, but gained valuable life experience.
    Last edit by sunnyjohn on Oct 21, '06

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