Has anyone mistaken you for a punching bag at work?

[mariebailey]

Yesterday, I was sitting with the charge nurse at the nurse's station, & a patient's family member came marching angrily toward us. "I have something for you; here!", she said irritably & loudly. She then shoved a tiny spider she'd caught in the patient's room in my charge nurse's face. She went on to tell us she was sure there were more spiders, & we needed to do something about it immediately. I watched my charge nurse put the spider in a bag & calmly tell her we would call staff to address it.

Here's what I wanted to say, even though I remained silent: "Ma'am, nurses are not your punching bag. We are not responsible for pest control or housekeeping because we are busy preserving the life & health of your loved one. If you want to be angry about a tiny, little spider, take your anger out on mother nature instead."

Do you ever feel like you are a punching bag to people as a nurse? Can you share a funny/weird/irritating event that happened to you at work in dealing with rude people? It'll be fun.

[champagnesupeRNova]

One time, a patient spat food at me and later on had the audacity to shoot pee on me!!

-NICU nurse:woot:

[NICUmiiki, DNP, NP]

I work in the ER. The better question is "Has anyone NOT mistaken me for a punching bag?"

[Anna S, RN]

No I am not anyone's punching bag. Anytime a patient or family gets disrespectful toward me or any of my technicians, I let them know pretty quickly that won't work. I keep calm and professional, no matter what. But I have actually refused to start dialysis treatments and abusive patients---- One case comes to mind. I had a very angry patient yelling at me and shaking his fist. So I invited him to leave the unit and told him I would call upon the police to assist in his removal, if he did not cooperate. Fortunately, my manager backs me on this. That patient has been civil and polite ever since, even nice, most of the time.

Removing them is not only for my sake, but a safety and security issue. The other patients can see and hear everything going on and it gratifies them that abusive patients are shown the door and just as importantly, gives them the idea that i am no-nonsense and won't tolerate being anyone's "punching bag" ever.

Dialysis lends itself well to disallowing patients to make punching bags out of technicians or nurses---or other patients. Once had one patient call another an a-h*** and the f-word in front of other patients and family members. I told him if he did it again, I would ask him to leave the premises. He got the message. EVERYONE witnesses what's going on and there is plenty of backup to my decision to disallow maltreatment from abusive patients.

That said, our world has gone completely un-civil. I would NEVER behave the way some of these patients and family members do towards ANYONE, let alone those taking care of me!

That's great, and I'm glad your manager backs you.

I worked at a dialysis unit once where a pt pulled a knife on a receptionist. Mgmt installed a panic button at her desk. They didn't say anything to the pt.

Most of the units where I've worked, the pt is always right, no matter what, according to mgmt.

[firstinfamily, RN]

So, lets take this a step further and ask---Why are nurses verbally, physically abused by family members and/or patients? Yes, sometimes it is the dementia patient that does not know what they are doing, sometimes it is a psychiatric pt who may have become delusional but why do family members or significant others of the pt seem to see the nurse as a symbol to let out their anger??? I have had family members approach me and ask something about the environment their loved one is in, much like the spider episode cited above. I have had family members just verbally whip lash me for no apparent reason----I stood there and took it and calmly told them I would try to see what could be done about the situation. It was nothing I had done or not done to this patient, but apparently I looked like the one who would get something done about the problem. Are there physical characteristics that make us look like a dart board, or are they just looking to lash out at the first professional they see?? Is it because they know we cannot say anything that might offend them or we just look like targets?? Is it out of anger because of what their loved one is going through and they feel powerless and maybe they are going through the steps of grief? Is it due to a legitimate reason? I have probably had more run ins with family members and significant others than pts. I am sure I have been hit by a patient at least twice in over 30 years of nursing but most of the verbal confrontations have come from others involved in the pts care. Sometimes it is due to a legitimate reason----the food tray has sugar on it and the pt is a diabetic. Sometimes it is due to another reason---the significant other does not understand what is going on and needs to know, now!!! If it is a situation where I am being attacked personally, I get my charge nurse or a supervisor. I explain the situation to them in private and then take them to the pt's room and let them try to smooth the situation over. I have rarely had a complaint against me, it seemed most of the time it was a complaint against the facility over something, or a miscommunication that someone else left for me to deal with. I find getting a third party that has more "authority" than myself gives the person making the complaint a power surge and the problem usually gets solved. Sometimes we cannot be the "end all" for others. I do remember a pt who had very obnoxious family members who were very accusatory towards the staff in general, very loud and disruptive to the other patients. I called security instead of trying to deal with them myself. You just never know, and in today's world it is better to do the safest thing, not only for yourself, but for your co-workers. We have a code "purple" at work that indicates there is a disruptive visitor and security will take care of the situation. This makes me feel that I am backed up by my organization. It also keeps me from getting defensive myself, I am a person who will go off verbally because I need to defend myself to prevent others from "walking" on me. I suggest if you have the same personality, you get a higher managerial person involved in any conflict. It gives you a third party who can solve the situation, and keeps you from making a mistake towards someone who can make things only more difficult and possibly lead to a dismissal or some form of disciplinary action on your record. Sorry, I got carried away!!

[dream'n, BSN, RN]

I am terrified of spiders, so I doubt this wife would have gotten the reaction she wanted from me

[been there,done it]

Do you understand what a punching bag is?

I regularly get mistaken for a punching bag, as in, I am hit, punched, smacked, grabbed, and pinched by confused patients who get fearful.

Not all definitions are literal. In this case OP means

1. A target; butt; whipping boy; scapegoat:
   
   

[PMFB-RN, RN]

Heck ya. I have been hit, bit, spit on, kicked, and one time stabbed by a long 3 inch needle that the resident left sitting there and the patient grabbed it and stabbed me with it. I once took a knee to the temple during a trama responce. A patient who was hopped up on meth brought his knee up while I was bent over his right arm. Knocked me cold for a count of 3 or so.

Many years ago while working at USC Hospital in down town east LA we had a nice young CNA, 7 months pregant, who was kicked so violently by a drug addict patient that she lost her baby inspite of being rushed to am emergency c-section.

[idialyze, BSN, RN]

I once managed a dialysis unit, a mentally ill patient knocked a nurse down. He was discharged on the spot. Since the dialysis community is a small one, word got around and no other clinic would admit him.

It was sad really, but the management took safety of staff very seriously.

[Here.I.Stand, BSN, RN]

I have no funny stories about being a punching bag...it's not funny. Where I work, if a family member physically or psychologically assaults us, security removes them and they lose their visiting privileges. If a patient physically assaults us, they buy themselves a set of 4-point restraints.

No, abuse is not part of the RN's job description.

[Here.I.Stand, BSN, RN]

That's great, and I'm glad your manager backs you.

I worked at a dialysis unit once where a pt pulled a knife on a receptionist. Mgmt installed a panic button at her desk. They didn't say anything to the pt.

Most of the units where I've worked, the pt is always right, no matter what, according to mgmt.

Oh my goodness NO...if someone is pulling a weapon, management's delusions should be ignored. And the notion that a pt threatening deadly force is right is just that--a delusion. Management should not even be consulted at that moment--LAW ENFORCEMENT should be!! We don't need permission to call 911.

[mariebailey, MSN, RN]

Many years ago while working at USC Hospital in down town east LA we had a nice young CNA, 7 months pregant, who was kicked so violently by a drug addict patient that she lost her baby inspite of being rushed to am emergency c-section.

That's depressing. Should not have happened.