1.5 years in and at the end of my rope....?

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    Not sure how to start this. I guess I would first like to say that I have immense respect for nurses of all areas and specialties, from the most advanced, specialized nurse to the "just-a-floor-nurse" nurses. I have posted previously about career decisions and advice, and here I am back again. I'll start by telling you that I am a young nurse, and have only been in nursing for 1.5 years, all of that time being either med-surg or med-telemtry.

    I realize I am very young in my career, so I am sure there are many who just want to roll their eyes immediately because I haven't "paid my dues", and I understand that. But I have always thought that if something is making you truly unhappy or causing a certain amount of grief, it is just not worth it.

    Like many, I come here today to basically complain about my job (that I realize I'm lucky to have at all), but also to ask for genuine advice, as I honestly don't know where else to go or what else to do. My woes are nothing that a little browsing on this board won't find you plenty of: the lack of support staff, the over-working, the madatory OT, disrespect and harrassment from higher-ups, doctors, family members, and patients, and so on and so forth. These everyday problems of a nurse have become too much for me to bear.

    I complain everyday to my loving and understanding husband, but he is unsure of where to guide me. The anxiety has consumed me. I have applied to over 100 other positions, both internally and in other hospitals and nothing has panned out. I have thought over and over again about leaving nursing all together to go back to a job with much less stress. I have thought about taking time off from nursing to see if it's something that I truly want to do, but fear that if I went that path, re-entering nursing would find me in my current situation (working a job that I try everyday to get out of). Obviously there are many different nursing jobs out there, but we all know they want more and more experience than ever before. To be quite honest, I believe the only thing keeping me in nursing is my financial responsibility.

    I know, I know. Woe is me, at least I have a job, the grass is always greener.

    Thank you to whoever takes the time to read this lengthy post, and an even bigger thanks to anyone willing to offer advice. The most thanks and blessings of all to all the nurses dealing with this same crap everyday.
    lrobinson5, xoemmylouox, and anotherone like this.
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    Be happy, find your own peace, take care of yourself first! You will find bull crap wherever you go, some places more then others, I would say if you are unhappy, it's unhealthy, if you feel as if there is nothing that can be done to savage your current working condition then change it! You gotta live with it in the end, you got to sleep with it, so, the decision comes from within! Jot it down, pros and cons, make a list, and choose,! You would be happy either way you decide to go, because it's your decision!Ps. Keep on swimming! You will eventually land where you want, just don't base "nursing" on your sole dreadful experience, ask yourself, do you like to be a nurse to begin with? What are you willing to deal with? What are your needs?Can you financially afford to take a break? Have you explored non acute nursing care? Agency work? Maybe night shift?...
    Davey Do likes this.
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    I'm not sure why the above poster thought this was funny but I will answer. I personally can not stand bedside nursing. That is why I am stepping away from it totally. I am going back school to become a FNP. I love the patients but hate all of the BS of working bedside in a hospital.
    beckster_01, kalevra, and Davey Do like this.
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    I agree with mom to 4, I'm 22 years old just got my BSN in May and RN license in June of this year. I work on a med surg Tele floor from hell at a large hospital, I loathe the bullcrap I have to put up with but have gained a ton of experience because our hospital allows insulin drips, heparin drips, and certain cardiac drips in our floor which is a nightmare if u have an insulin drip pt, heparin drip pt, trach pt, and total care pts with bedsores and peg tube feedings which I've had all at one time before. I love the experience of the hospital but in agreement of my hatred of bedside nursing. There is just not enough autonomy and after taxes and benefits are taken out my check the money is just not worth the amount of time I'm away from my son who is 4. I went through a depression stage at one time but now I've resolved to go back to school this upcoming summer or fall for my FNP. I want better hours and more autonomy without taking a pay cut as I would if I went to a drs office or clinic as an RN. I love the nursing but not bedside, I was a CNA for 4 years while attending college and I feel I'm still treated with the same disrespect for my title as an RN as I was as a CNA. I won't wait for 5 years to see if I'll grow to love it or for experience to move to a different job setting, I'm ready for school now so that's my path. You gotta do what's best for you!
    kalevra likes this.
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    I hear ya!! I am in the same boat as you. I graduated in May 2010, obtained my first position on a medical surgical unit (no telemetry) :uhoh21: and I too have applied at over 100 positions both internally and externally. I have interviewed for 5 positions and nothing has panned out either. I am currently completing my MSN in nursing education and once I complete that I am scheduled to start the FNP certification program in April. I agree with the above posters that bedside nursing does not allow enough autonomy and respect. I too often feel as disrespected as I did when I was a CNA. What keeps me going each day is my awesome co-workers and the impact I leave on patients (even if it is just a few at a time). We all are in the same boat and on NOC's like I work now, we support each other. When I worked on days we were always running around having a million things to do so, it was hard at times to get help when you needed it. Do you have any ideas of what kind of nursing you would like to work in? If so I would work toward getting certifications in in certain areas to increase the likelyhood that you will be selected for another job. Also going back to school also allows you more autonomy. There are several jobs out there for nursing in several different areas. Hospital nursing is a starting point, but it is not always for everyone. I am currently trying to obtain a position in the ER and without ER experience, ICU, or Tele. I have been having a difficult time, despite being ACLS certified and almost having my Masters. I always say that when the right time comes, you will find your passion. I do not recommend walking away from your job just now. Is there anything you can do to make it better (switch shifts, decrease your hours, internally transfer?) If this is really where you do not want to be often talking to managers and HR to help you works. I know some girls who were not a fan of my current floor went and talked to my manager, and were moved to another floor that suited them better. I have tried this and they tell me to stick it out lol (I don't think they want to lose a good worker lol). Best of luck to you. Consider this nursing has a vast variety of opportunities and hospital nursing is just one route. With 6 more months (or so I am told) you should be able to transition into a job that better suites you! Good luck!
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    Your floor/hospital sounds like it has no support. I worked in a craphole like that for way to long and it burned me out. I should have realized how bad it was early on and left. Where I work now has decent staffing, so nurses do have autonomy. It is possible, IF you find the right place to work.
    For now, IMO, I would keep on working and just try to suck it up. I wouldn't want to explain a gap in my career so early on, you know?
    Good luck. I have been where you have been in my career, and it's not a fun place to be. It can get better if you find your niche.
    Not_A_Hat_Person likes this.
  11. 5
    Quote from EmergencyNrse
    Why was this post funny to you. Shame shame shame on you. Unbelievable, that I work in a community of nurses and someone like you in it. I would not want to dare have my family member be under your ER care. Because you are inappropriate, immature and insensitive. Boo-whoo to you!
    lisaemt, beckster_01, missladyrn, and 2 others like this.
  12. 4
    Quote from EmergencyNrse
    You are being disrespectful by posting this. The OP is very depressed and needs help and for people to listen.
    Hope u don't find yourself in the same position one day.
    Can't believe u find the post funny; what's wrong with you??
    lisaemt, beckster_01, missladyrn, and 1 other like this.
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    I've been a nurse for a year, and I feel the same way sometimes. As a second career nurse, I went in eyes open.However, the lack of consideration from coworkers, constant requests to pick up shifts, etc...leaves me wondering if I truly want to tolerate this for 20 more years.Eventually, there will be a place where we fit.
    Not_A_Hat_Person and Davey Do like this.


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