Advice for a New Grad RN After Quitting job/ Orientation after 5 & 1/2 months

[DonovanRN]

Hi Everyone,

I am looking for advice from experienced RNs and nursing recruiters. I will try to keep this as brief as possible but it's complicated.

I am an adult male in his 40's, second career, new graduate RN, having graduated in January 2009 with my Associates in nursing with a GPA of 3.65. I passed my NCLEX in February 2009 at 75 questions. I started my dream job in the ICU in March 2009 beginning my 6 months orientation. I worked VERY hard (long story) to get this job and was excited to begin my career as a critical care RN.

My new grad orientation was very complicated, having several preceptors and then switching to one preceptor after 4 months of hell. My new preceptor was great but I was having a lot of problems with time management and anxiety and feeling overwhelmed all the time. I know this is expected as a new grad but it was truly hell for me and effecting my work. I never argued and always took the criticism graciously and seriously. I was determined to learn to become a good critical care nurse, but I continued to be corrected all the time and told I was not picking up fast enough and that they were concerned if I would be able to work safely on my own after my 6 months orientation.

I was called into meet with my nursing educator and the nursing director on 2 occasions to discuss their concerns. I told them how much I wanted this and that I was trying very hard but I was aware I was struggling with time management and being overwhelmed. After this last meeting I was told to decide if I wanted to consider resigning as I may fired in the near future if I continued to struggle. Well after hearing that and knowing how miserable I had been the last 5 1/2 months, I decided to resign and protect my nursing license I worked so hard to get.

I was extremely disappointed that I found myself resigning from my dream job and I was so humiliated that I left that day and never spoke to another person I worked with again. I couldn't even transfer to another job at this hospital over feeling I would always be reminded that "I failed" and I wasn't capable to be a critical care RN.

It has been 2 months now with no job. I have applied to SEVERAL jobs and even had a couple interviews but when I was asked why I left my first job after 5 1/2 months, I explained it was "bad fit", and that I discovered that critical-care was not for me and that I wanted to experience other environments to learn and grow in. Well, that didn't go over well. I was asked to further explain why I would quit my first job after only 5 months and never completed my orientation? The nurse recruiter was a previous critical-care RN and would not stop asking me to explain why it was a "bad fit". I guess I didn't answer her questions in a way she liked and she really wanted to get me to say I wasn't able to handle it. She said that it was a RED Flag to her that I left my first job so soon in my training. Obviously I didn't get that job.

So, I decided on my next job application and phone interview with a recruiter to not mention the new grad RN job at all. I thought I would just be a new grad with no experience looking for work like so many of us out there. Well, she asked me why I was still not working after 9 months since I got my RN License. I explained I had traveled some and that I hadn't found the right opportunity yet. Well, she said... "Wood luck to you in your future and we will keep you in our "new grad pile". So that was a bust too.

So my question is this: Should I mention my 5 1/2 months of ICU training from a prestigious hospital or just leave it off my resume and hope they never find out? I was told to be honest as they could find out, but when I am honest it seems like they think less of me for resigning my first job during orientation and that it's a RED FLAG not to hire me. Well, with so many new grad nurses looking for work I can't afford a red flag these days.

I know the job market is horrible right now for new grads and it's very depressing especially for me loosing my "dream job". I guess it wasn't meant to be and I am trusting that something better is ahead for me.

I am still pretty traumatized from the entire experience and still now have sleepless nights and or nightmares about my ICU experience. I sometimes wonder if bedside nursing is for me. I would love to find a clinic job but I know right now I need to take whatever I can and get a year or two of experience.

I am also looking to complete my BSN and may go back now while I am still looking for work, though I need a job soon as I have a mortgage to pay. I may have to get another kind of job if I can't find a nursing job.

So does anyone have any Job Search and interview advice for me? Words of wisdom are also welcome. I feel bad enough on my own so you can save the negative comments for someone else thanks.

Look forward hearing from you.

Thanks!

[RNsharkinaj]

Definitely put your experience on your resume. Just because you decided to step down during your short stay in that position, you could explain. When asked make it apparent that your high aspirations were a bit too ambitious for your level of skill. Also, reaffirm the fact that you didn't get a proper orientation because you were unable to stick with one preceptor, and felt uncomfortable about it. That the hospital didn't foster an adequate environment for learning.

Experience is going to be what helps you acquire the next job, the next employer will have less that they need to teach you. You most likely to have a lot of skills down, but don't forget that you tried to start out in the ICU...that is extremely difficult to do...don't stress!!

[marilynmom, LPN, NP]

I can sympathize.

I started off as a new grad in a level one trauma center teaching hospital ICU. Even though I did fairly well and lasted a year ( have no idea how I managed to last that long), as soon as they started giving me truly critical patients my stress level went THROUGH the roof. I had SO MUCH anxiety even on my days off (I was even taking anti anxiety meds) I just couldn't take it anymore and resigned (I couldn't sleep at ALL, was sick to my stomach, would get stressed that I couldn't think logically, etc). As a new grad, you simply don't know what you dont know. My ICU training was only 10 weeks long. Some new grads do fine in ICU and some don't. We are all just different. I even worked on the unit for a year as a tech.

I went to psych. I work in a low acuity unit and I enjoy it. For me, I am just not cut out for all that adrenalin and stress on a constant basis (there definitely ARE psych units that are dangerous and high acuity though). I had to come to terms with that, I was really hard on myself after I resigned after that first year (for me it did NOT get easier....but harder).

Take your experience as a learning experience. After that year I had a much better idea what type of long term nursing care I wanted to do. I dont like working in the hospital for one, I don't want to be stressed out my entire shift like that again, etc. So for me things like low acuity psych, school nursing, clinics, health department, teaching, public health, even non bedside paper work nursing, etc appeal to me.

I have no real advice on what to put on your resume or not cause I really have no idea, but wanted you to know your NOT alone in your feelings. It is OK that ICU as a new grad is not a good fit. The thing is, you dont know what type of nursing will fit you best until you try and see!

Your 5 months of ICU has given you some skills, you probably have more skills (especially critical thinking) than your giving yourself credit for.

[me_again]

I, too, am a second-career new-grad nurse who quit during an orientation period. My circumstances were quite similar to yours. I had no fewer than 8 preceptors, and I was in a high volume, high stress area.

My former working life included lots of responsibility, multi-tasking and so on and so forth. But none of that prepared me for entering nursing in the field I had fallen into.

When I quit, it was well known that I gave 100% toward making it work. My managers and co-workers respected me for what I DID bring, not what I didn't. And maybe that made "it" easier for me to swallow, the "it" being failing. But the shame, which no one could have laid on me any heavier than I laid on myself, was sickening. I felt overwhelmed and inadequate.

I wholly suspect I am preaching to the choir here, because I recognize myself in you. You are great at what you bring, you don't let anyone down, and are probably extremely good with patients. You are a people person....

But, here's the rub: You have always spoken (and this is a figure of speech so as not to offend anyone), the English language, not the new language of medicine and codes and abbreviations. (And that's part of the problem, not everyone is on the same page with that business of unacceptable abbreviations, are they? So it's like learning more than one new language: the one you learned in nursing school and that which the nurses have been using forever) Then, of course there are clinical skills and pumps and protocols and etc., etc., etc.

Bless the preceptors, for they must train, keep you from doing harm, undo what you've done, then do it themselves! From them, did you hear, "everyone does it their own way, but this is how I do it?" Multiply that times however many preceptors you had! Those nurses think they are helpful when they say it, but it's very hard to establish a working routine when everyone does it differently....

And there are patients and their families, some of whom are starving for you to care, to sit with them and explain what's happening. But there is "time management" demanding you look the other way, and pulling on your sleeve.

Now I see how much of time management is, and I dare not say "shortcuts," but knowing the important from the not-so-much.

Anyway, I am employed again, and in the same field. But it's a quieter, gentler setting. I absolutely disclosed where I had been and also that I "chose out" of the previous situation. My leaving my first job was just this simple: The learning curve was above what I could do as a brand new nurse, and that's the explanation I gave. Wow, sounds like the same truth you have, right? I wouldn't want to work for anyone that didn't accept the truth.

In closing, I wish you well. I hope my message helps you know you are not alone, but just a representative of our "club" of new nurses!

You bring something special to nursing, Donovan. You are an excellent communicator and respectful. I'm thinking that is just the tip of who you are. You will touch lives in a yet-to-be-determined circumstance.

There is another place for you, and they will be lucky to have you, I'm sure of it.

[kb88]

This is kind of off topic, but I'm curious. You said that nursing is your second career. What was your first?

[DonovanRN]

Hi Everyone,

Well, first I need to thank ALL of you for taking the time to read my story and responding to me with your words of encouragement.

So here is an update. Today I just received TWO JOB OFFERS! I know! CRAZY right?

Well, for the last few months I have used this time well to recover, reflect and move on. I started doing perdiem work while interviewing at some major hospitals in the city. While working at an outpatient clinic in the GI/Endoscopy suite (which I really enjoyed) I met the nurse manager and we seemed to click and she said that they may have a full time position for me if I was interested. I said YES I am interested. Two days later I went in for an official interview and was told right then that they wanted to hire me but they weren't sure if I would be working in GI/Endoscopy or Urgent Care (the clinics versions of an Emergency Dept.). The hours are M-F no overnights or weekends as it's an out patient clinic with general medical offices as well as GI and Chemo clinics.

The next day I get a call offering me the job but they hadn't agreed on a salary for the position yet, we are in negotiations and they may match or get close to the hospital pay. Most of the nursing staff are LPNs and Medical Assistants and very few RNs, but they are trying to change that by hiring more RNs.

A few hours later I get a call from one of the local hospitals I interviewed with that they wanted to offer me a position on the Oncology floor, either a part time day position with option for a full time day position within 6-8 mos, or a full time nights only position. The floor is very stressful with a high turn over rate and a lot of new grads, but it's a great hospital that would be help to further develop my nursing skills, as I am still a new grad.

So, as you can see things certainly have turned around for me and now I have to make a decision for what is best for me now. Working in oncology may be tough for me as my parents passed away recently (one of cancer) and dealing with more death and dying just isn't high on my list. But, I know it would look better on my resume to have 2 years of nursing experience on an oncology unit giving chemo, etc. over a clinic job in Urgent Care or GI. Also, since the clinic LPN heavy this would effect my training and orientation.

I think I would enjoy the clinic job the most due to hours and quality of life and lower (different) level of stress than the hospital. But I don't want to mess up my nursing career options for the future without 2 years of hospital nursing experience.

What do you people out there think?

I want to work where I will be happy, grow and enjoy my life. That's all work is really supposed to be about - a way to enjoy life.

Let me know your thoughts.

Thanks!

Happy Holidays!

Donovan

[MedSurgeMess]

you sound like you're leaning toward the clinic job....GO FOR IT!!!!!

[RedhairedNurse, BSN, RN]

i don't like either of the words mentioned here.... "overwhelmed" or "bad fit." both of these terms sound very bad to a potential employer you can be overwhelmed in any department not just medsurg. just don't admit that it happens to you. it's possible for a new employer to think that you will be overwhelmed or a bad fit for them as well, they could say to themselves 'why would he be any different here?'

if it were me, i would be totally honest on your resume. that was some very good experience you received in the icu. i bet if you were to go to a medsurg area, you would probably kick *** and be very efficient. as far as leaving it off your resume.....you can not do that. i've been told that there is some sort of database that lists license hospital personnel. you should not, by any means, hide/lie about your previous hospital/nursing experience.

i sure hope your post serves as a reminder that the icu is not appropriate for a new grad. i'm sure some can handle it, but for the most part, i've seen many posts on this forum about new grads not making it in the icu, then quitting and having one heck of a hard time finding another job. there is no way i'd go into icu right out of school. i've been a nurse for almost two years and i still feel like i need more experience, or at least some tele experience. i remain a floor nurse for now.

as far as you finding another job, don't give up, keep trying. you may have to go to a nursing home for a couple of years to get your job history straightened out. it's usually very tough finding a job if you've been at your last job for less than a year, especially in nursing. you'll have to be persistent and have patience.

i would tell your future employer this, say "my desire was to be a critical care nurse but i realized it was a higher level acuity than what i was prepared for especially being right out of nursing school. i realize that it would have been more appropriate to go into medsurg to learn basic nursing skills first.

i would still love to go into critical care, but only after i spend a couple of years in medsurg learning to improve on my assessment skills along with improving on time management skills." you should not have to go into details if you put it like this, or at least, i would think.

practice practice practice what you will say on your next job interview.

do not say anything negative if you can help it. if you choose your words very carefully, you can get hired.

matter of fact, i would hire you in a heartbeat minute! you will get another job if you follow my advice along with some of the good advice you have seen here, with your education, i'm sure you can differentiate between the good advice and the not so good advice.

good luck and have a merry christmas.

ps. i'm thinking that it may be a good idea to let your future employer know that you were given an ultimatum from this employer and that you did not choose to quit, they encouraged you very strongly to resign. and i would only tell them this as a last resort. they didn't want to fire you due to the fact you could have drawn unemployment on them, but that's the reason they wanted you to resign, so they wouldn't have to pay you. but seriously, next time, swallow the humble pie and don't worry about what people think. you'd look like a stronger person by staying with the organization and moving to a different department.

[RedhairedNurse, BSN, RN]

I just read your post on page 3. I missed it earlier before I wrote my post.

Congrats on the job offer.

If it were me, I'd take the job on the oncology floor. It may be too hard on you though with losing your parents. But you will get more experience on this floor, its a lot like medsurg type floor, so if you want to go back into ICU, you will have some assessment skills and time management under your belt. Just make sure what ever you decide, you'll be able to stick with it a year or two, because you need that on your resume.

Congrats again, i'm very happy for you.

[meluhn]

Definitely the clinic job. Oncology is a high burnout area because it is so sad and the patients are so sick. The clinic job sounds great and I don't think it will mess up your resume at all. You can never go wrong with any specialty area, except for maybe LTC or rehab. Theses areas are not highly esteemed among nurse recruiters for reasons I will never understand. (That is a whole other post) Good luck with whatever you choose (I hope its the clinic:)

[paacollins]

I'd grab the clinic job in a heartbeat but I did my preceptorship in day surgery and we did a lot of GI cases. I loved it. Get them in, treat them, get them back out. Way more one on one than with floor nursing. I'm so glad things have turned around for you. I hope whichever job you choose works out fantastically well for you.

[babblingbrook]

I was in a similiar situation as you. I worked 10 months in the NICU straight out of nursing school. I was told by the charge it would be a good idea to resign because there was a good possibility I'd be terminated. I chose to resign in order to save my nursing license. I tried asking for other depts at the hospital b/c I realized I should have gone to med/surg or tele first in order to gain better skills PRIOR to an ICU setting. They just told me that I'd have to go back in to the new grad program, but then they said that they'd already done the new grad interviews and there were no positions for me. So even if you'd asked to go in to another dept it doesn't mean things would have changed.

I'm still looking for a job, unfortunately. So you're having better luck than me!lol Most hospitals won't even give me a chance b/c apparently they assume since I went straight in to NICU I would leave med/surg as soon as I could. (that's what I had a nurse recruiter tell me). Why do new grad nurses not seem to get a 2nd chance after we realize that although our heart was set on a dept our brains are smart enough to tell us you're in over your head and to back it up a notch and go to med/surg? It's like we are blasted off the radar b/c we're human and too gung ho.

I've been trying to look for psych, LTC, dr's offices for jobs but haven't had much luck.

Best of luck to you!

[iRN86]

Congrats op! God closes one door and opens several others. I'm in a similar situation. Got terminated after a month orientation at a nursing home because apparently I wasn't initiative and they got feedback that I had a huge ego -_-. This was the first time ever since being on orientation that I got feeback regarding my performance. Had I had known before I would've tried to change. Sometimes I need outside help to figure out what I'm doing wrong.one of my coworker acted like I was doing fine yet go behind my back and tell the don how I have a huge ego because I'm a RN and what not..very hurtful. I guess that's a welcome to the world of nursing politics.