Triage complaints- the good, the bad, and the shocking. - page 18

by canoehead 121,586 Views | 333 Comments

"I was raped by an octopus." "I have severe, severe, severe, SEVERE, SEVERE cold sores!" (five severes, I counted. And one cold sore visible.) Discuss.... Read More


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    Mother comes to ER with 12y/o with c/o DIB...hx of asthma, no objective s/s of DIB, slight wheezing....
    Lobby security tells me the pt and Mother came RUNNING across the parking lot!
    Me:"what?"...."we'll running fast is still the best treatment..."
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    My favorites are always the 17-25 year olds that show up for vaginal bleeding precisely 28 days after their LMP. BY AMBULANCE.
    monkeybug and turnforthenurseRN like this.
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    Today: shortness of breath on and off for 80 years since I was 9.

    Definitely the longest duration of symptoms I've ever heard.
    maelstrom143, nitenite, psu_213, and 1 other like this.
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    Quote from R!XTER
    Today: shortness of breath on and off for 80 years since I was 9.

    Definitely the longest duration of symptoms I've ever heard.
    Hahahaha, that's awesome.... And after 80yrs it became an emergency right then!
    gcupid and maelstrom143 like this.
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    Seeing "walking quadriplegia" as a direct quote from the pt. in triage had us all scratching our heads...
    maelstrom143 and sapphire18 like this.
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    Pre-constipation.... Hadn't pooped in 3 days.
    maelstrom143, sapphire18, and silverbat like this.
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    Quote from SweetMelissaRN

    Hahahaha, that's awesome.... And after 80yrs it became an emergency right then!
    It was actually a pretty legit CHF exacerbation but the pt clearly didn't have a good grasp on his medical history. He told the doc he'd been having SOB on and off since since he's 9 "it goes away for a few years but it always comes back!" So the doc asks if he's asthmatic so he responds "well yeah, isn't that what shortness of breath is?!"

    I wish I has more time to educate my patients.
    maelstrom143 and nitenite like this.
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    Quote from SillyStudent
    My favorites are always the 17-25 year olds that show up for vaginal bleeding precisely 28 days after their LMP. BY AMBULANCE.
    I'll never forget the labor triage with a c/o bleeding that wasn't actually even pregnant. "But what do I do about this bleeding?!?!" "Umm, Tampax?"
    DeLanaHarvickWannabe likes this.
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    We had a guy come in one night that was having some swelling in his testicles. Okay, fair enough. He pulls his pants down and his boys are indeed swollen, but he turns around and there is a massive area on his butt that is swollen and red, with some horribly smelly drainage. We ask his what happened, and he said, "Oh that? That's where my friend branded me with a steel pipe last week. Does it look bad?" Apparently he doesn't mind if half his ass rots off, but the boys start swelling and then maybe we'll look into seeing a doctor.
    Last edit by Esme12 on Jun 22, '13
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    51 y/o male, cc "the veins in my feet are pulsating." umm ok.... Hx of anxiety.

    24 y/o female, "i'm nauseous and hungry". Umm ok, please pee in this cup.


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