I got my CNA lincense in the beginning of October. While looking for a CNA job, I worked as a caregiver for almost a month. The job was easy and my clients are really nice. But I thought I need a real CNA job in order to get some nursing experience, so I applied to hospitals and nursing homes. The only place that accepted me is a nursing home. I had the CNA job for about 2 weeks and I feel like I am drowning. I am depressed everyday and terrified to go to work. This is what happened during my orientation: I let two people fall. Neither of them hurt, and nurses were notified. I think it's my fault because I used the gait belt but didn't recognize that I was not capable of transferring them (I am a petite new CNA without any experience). So after that, everyone started passing the words that I cannot transfer people. I didn't feel like I am ready to be off orientation, so I asked the nurse if I could get a couple more days. The truth is the nursing home is really short on staff, so they were pushing to get me off orientation and start on my own asap. We usually have 4 CNAs during the day shift, but today is just me and three other experienced CNAs. I didn't feel comfortable being assigned my own patients (10 patients) but there is no other way around it due to short of staff, so they gave me my patients anyway. Everything was fine in the morning, but I was pulled to go to a transfer training for 1 hour and 15 minutes in the middle of the day because the nurses feel like I need to get more training. So I missed my two 15 minutes break. Didn't get my lunch break until I told the charge nurse that it's 2 hours before the end of my shift and I still haven't eaten yet. So I went for lunch for 20 minutes and came back realizing that I have to help a patient to shower. Well, I've never done her shower before and she needs a hoyer lift. I was freaking out because everyone is getting ready to leave (1/2 hour before the end of the shift). I asked 2 other CNAs to help me which they did but neither of them think it's urgent so they just took their time. I showered the patient by myself but was really frustrated because she is pretty much dead weight and she screams "help" all the time. At this point, I still have two more patient to chart, but after I finally put her back into bed, it's already 10 minutes after the shift. If we can't finish charting before the end of our shift, the computer doesn't allow us to chart anymore. I told the nurse that I don't want to get into trouble but I didn't have time to chart her. She told me it's OK (I was told by other CNAs that if I didn't chart on time I would get a write-up). Anyway, sorry about the long post. I just feel like I am being thrown into a lion's den and had no idea how to do my job right. I am constantly under stress. While the nurses are friendly to me, and ask me what trainings I need, I just don't know what to tell them. I feel like I am so slow (but I am always busy, running around). Can you give me some insights? Thank you!