The life cycle of a CNA forum member

  1. So a lot of the posts on here can get a little... predictable. From now on just use this handy guide to find out how many more threads to expect from any given member before getting to the good stuff:

    1. Joins the site, finds the CNA forum. "Hi everybody my name is FutureNurse123 and I want to work in healthcare in some capacity!"

    2. Makes a thread asking what's better: taking the class at a community college, the Red Cross, or a nursing home. Learns that they are all the same. Wants to know if CNA is even right for them. Nobody knows. Oh and by the way, what is the difference between a CNA, NA, STNA, PCT, etc.? Answer: not much. Oh and one more thing- can a boy be a CNA?

    3. Complains about instructor and/or classmates. Learns that mean and/or stupid people are EVERYWHERE, including their future place of employment.

    4. Reads more posts and decides that the aforementioned Mean People are posting on this very forum! They didn't give me the advice I wanted to hear! And some of the things these people say about their jobs horrifies me. I thought CNAs wanted to help people- they should never complain about anything.

    5. Omg! We have to clean up POOP?! Makes a thread requesting information about exactly how much poop and grossness a CNA can expect to run into on a typical day and how to deal with it (um, I don't know... hold your breath and don't look at it Believe me poop is not the grossest thing you will see).

    6. Decides that old people are gross and cleaning up poop is not for them. OR, that nursing homes are "depressing" and they're just too sensitive and caring to be exposed to that. Makes a thread asking what other employment they should seek as a CNA. Is told their best option is to get over it.

    7. Starts clinicals. Makes a thread about how the CNAs they're following are unfriendly, or too busy to teach them stuff, or they don't do everything by the book, or they're unprofessional in some other way. ***Obviously those CNAs have no business BEING nurse aides in the first place!!!*** As a student, I just *know* that I am going to be the best, most caring and professional CNA around!

    8. Finishes the program and starts freaking out about the state test. Asks all kinds of rhetorical and non-rhetorical questions about it. Is told to calm down because it's easy. Learns to speak the steps out loud as they do them and that mistakes are allowed if caught before the skill is over.

    9. Passes the test. Easily. Yay!

    10. Posts a resume question. ie "I have no experience, so I'm just gonna list every single skill I ever learned in class- should I list Bedmaking AND Occupied Bedmaking?" And by the way, what do I wear to the interview? Oh and also, I'm 8 months pregnant. Can I still apply for the job? Will they find out?

    11. Posts a question about how a brand new CNA with no experience can get a hospital job, because as they've already decided, nursing home work is just not for them. And hospital jobs seem SO cool and SO easy! And what do you mean they want experience? How can I get experience if the hospital won't give me a chance? But I don't WANT to work in a nursing home!!!

    12. Gets a job. In a nursing home. It's okay, we won't say "I told you so." Freaks out about not getting enough training. Is miserable for at least a month. Posts a question asking if they should quit. Is told that every place is the same. Develops a thicker skin and a warped sense of humor. Actually becomes good at the job (hopefully) and learns to like it... sometimes.

    13. Posts about lazy, annoying coworkers, lack of supplies, and chit chats about how to make the job easier. Also vents about the residents. Gets told off by a CNA student for doing that.
    Last edit by fuzzywuzzy on Jun 17, '10
  2. Visit fuzzywuzzy profile page

    About fuzzywuzzy

    Joined: Sep '08; Posts: 1,879; Likes: 2,814
    CNA; from US
    Specialty: 3 year(s) of experience in cna in ltc


  3. by   fuzzywuzzy
    Oh and yes, I know I'm mean and insensitive and not everybody posts all these things, etc. I'm not trying to be a jerk. I know that's what this forum is for, and I believe that most of the questions I mentioned are 100% legitimate! I've been there, done that, and I just thought it was funny that so many of the same things get posted a zillion times.
  4. by   NM nurse to be
    Brilliant, Fuzzy! I know when I first came on here, I did a few of those

    14. Been around here long enough to have figured out the cycle and organized it into a list you can speak out loud as you do the skill (step).

    So should we make this a sticky and have new members post where they are in the cycle when they get here? It would make the forum so much faster to read and reply
  5. by   Poi Dog
    15. Comes to realize that they cannot change coworkers, an LTC, the DON, or negativity so they decide to join a convent or a monastery. It's a toss up between that or to live in a cave with a tribe of baboons.
  6. by   CoffeemateCNA
    16. Sees any of the above 1-12 and verbalizes "Oh Lord, not ANOTHER one of these people!" I know I'm somewhat new here, but I already had work experience when I joined and luckily I skipped those steps.

    And how can you forget the threads along the lines of "Anyone in [insert city or state here]?" or "Have any of you ever worked at [insert facility name here]?" There really aren't that many people that actually post to this particular forum, even fewer that do so on a regular basis. There is maybe a 0.00125% chance that someone is actually going to answer your question.

    Oh, and don't post a reply to your own thread only 30 minutes later wondering why NOBODY has answered your question!!

    Or the people that post a new thread that is the exact same subject that other people have posted 649,163,487,126,591,793 times already. Um, the search engine isn't just for looks!

  7. by   pca_85
    So let's think outside the box-who's gotten bit by the most residents this week? We can make a chart and the winner gets a tshirt.................
  8. by   Kyla.ann
    I haven't started my CNA course yet (just a few more weeks to go! - do you think I will have to deal with poop? ) but I still found this post to be hilarious and from what I have seen lurking here over the past month or so, it is so true!
  9. by   Dorali
    That's sooo funny because it's SOOOOO true!

    I guess I was one of the smart ones (not to brag or anything!) because I used the search engine to find what I needed. I mean, even Google pulled up links to AllNurses!

    By the way, Im at Stage 13 now. I survived and I DO like it at the nursing home!

    Good job Fuzzy!

  10. by   KimberlyRN89
    I'm at stage 13 too! And it only took me a year lol
  11. by   justme01
    8 months pregnant.....will they find out
  12. by   titans767
    Thanks I needed a laugh this morning after the night I had.I get off at seven and at six had lady possibly have a heart attack so that slowed everything down plus it still bothers me for my residents to get sick or fall.
    And I did not check but i am sure i made a few of them type of post but i am now very happily employed at a nursing home cleaning poop every day (still want to make more money)
  13. by   CoffeemateCNA
    Quote from justme01
    8 months pregnant.....will they find out
    "Hey guyz wazzuppp just wondering if i can become cna i have 15 dui's this passt 2 yeare none of them went to court. they won't find that on my backround check will they when i apply to cna program will they? i do have 1 previous convition for grand theft auto but i didn't do anything wrong i was framed. just got out of jail after 9 months i on probation now and oh ya and my baby mama made up a bunch of crap about me and the police believed here and now they have warrant for my arrest but i swearr none of it is true at all i am inocent and i want to get my record expunged from the matter so pleeze guyz tell me if i can be cna ok thanks. ps im not asking fore legal advicee just want know if i can be cna now."

    ^^Those never get old either.
    Last edit by CoffeemateCNA on Jun 18, '10
  14. by   Poi Dog
    I rolling on the floor laughing here