The life cycle of a CNA forum member

Nursing Students CNA/MA

Published

So a lot of the posts on here can get a little... predictable. From now on just use this handy guide to find out how many more threads to expect from any given member before getting to the good stuff:

1. Joins the site, finds the CNA forum. "Hi everybody my name is FutureNurse123 and I want to work in healthcare in some capacity!" :wlcmhnds:

2. Makes a thread asking what's better: taking the class at a community college, the Red Cross, or a nursing home. Learns that they are all the same. Wants to know if CNA is even right for them. Nobody knows. Oh and by the way, what is the difference between a CNA, NA, STNA, PCT, etc.? Answer: not much. Oh and one more thing- can a boy be a CNA?

3. Complains about instructor and/or classmates. Learns that mean and/or stupid people are EVERYWHERE, including their future place of employment.

4. Reads more posts and decides that the aforementioned Mean People are posting on this very forum! They didn't give me the advice I wanted to hear! And some of the things these people say about their jobs horrifies me. I thought CNAs wanted to help people- they should never complain about anything. :nono:

5. Omg! We have to clean up POOP?! Makes a thread requesting information about exactly how much poop and grossness a CNA can expect to run into on a typical day and how to deal with it (um, I don't know... hold your breath and don't look at it :D Believe me poop is not the grossest thing you will see).

6. Decides that old people are gross and cleaning up poop is not for them. OR, that nursing homes are "depressing" and they're just too sensitive and caring to be exposed to that. Makes a thread asking what other employment they should seek as a CNA. Is told their best option is to get over it.

7. Starts clinicals. Makes a thread about how the CNAs they're following are unfriendly, or too busy to teach them stuff, or they don't do everything by the book, or they're unprofessional in some other way. :nono: ***Obviously those CNAs have no business BEING nurse aides in the first place!!!*** :nono: As a student, I just *know* that I am going to be the best, most caring and professional CNA around! :saint:

8. Finishes the program and starts freaking out about the state test. Asks all kinds of rhetorical and non-rhetorical questions about it. Is told to calm down because it's easy. Learns to speak the steps out loud as they do them and that mistakes are allowed if caught before the skill is over.

9. Passes the test. Easily. Yay! :ancong!:

10. Posts a resume question. ie "I have no experience, so I'm just gonna list every single skill I ever learned in class- should I list Bedmaking AND Occupied Bedmaking?" And by the way, what do I wear to the interview? Oh and also, I'm 8 months pregnant. Can I still apply for the job? Will they find out?

11. Posts a question about how a brand new CNA with no experience can get a hospital job, because as they've already decided, nursing home work is just not for them. And hospital jobs seem SO cool and SO easy! And what do you mean they want experience? How can I get experience if the hospital won't give me a chance? But I don't WANT to work in a nursing home!!!

12. Gets a job. In a nursing home. It's okay, we won't say "I told you so." :) Freaks out about not getting enough training. Is miserable for at least a month. Posts a question asking if they should quit. Is told that every place is the same. Develops a thicker skin and a warped sense of humor. Actually becomes good at the job (hopefully) and learns to like it... sometimes.

13. Posts about lazy, annoying coworkers, lack of supplies, and chit chats about how to make the job easier. Also vents about the residents. Gets told off by a CNA student for doing that.

I rolling on the floor laughing here :clown:

Stage 1.5:

Decides to ignore the 5 BILLION other threads over the same topic and posts, "What is a typical CNA shift like?" or "What do CNAs do on (insert shift here)?"

Stage 7.5:

"LIKEOHMYGOSHHHHHH! The CNA I was shadowing during clinicals yesterday actually threw dirty linens on the floor! I went home and cried all night onto my tear-stained pillow. How do I go about reporting this SAVAGE abuse?? This CNA should lose her license."

Wah wah wah. Grow up. If that's the worst thing you saw, count your blessings [also see Stage 12.5].

Stage 9.5:

Again, ignores the 5 BILLION other threads over the same topic and posts "What shift should I start out on?"

Let me save you some time -- 98% of us are going to tell you to start out on evenings.

Stage 10.5:

"Hey guys, I was at a party 2 weeks ago and I was taking hits from a bong. I just got called for an interview at a local LTC. It's my dream job. Do you think they will drug test me right away? Do you think it would show up on the test? Is there anything I can do to get it out of my system quicker? How do you think I should explain it to them if it's positive?"

Stage 11.5:

"Hello everyone. I'm a nursing student and I am going to be a nurse practitioner one day. During the skills lab, I made an unoccupied bed in only 11 minutes ALL BY MYSELF (amazing, right?!?). My instructor said I am so smart I can just bypass working in a nursing home and go straight into the hospital working as a PCT. How do I go about doing this?"

Since your almighty instructor thinks you're so "smart", why don't you ask him/her?

Stage 12.5:

"I am so so scared right now. Last night at work, one of my residents fell. And I forgot to take out the trash. I think I am going to lose my license."

You will not lose your "license" over that. There are CNAs in the world that have practically killed people and not lost their "license." And by the way, CNAs do not have licenses. They are UNLICENSED assistive personnel. Nurses are the ones with licenses; CNAs have certifications. Hence - LICENSED practical nurse (LPN) and CERTIFIED nurse assistant (CNA). It's amazing that those abbreviations actually stand for something important. And I know you SWEAR up and down that in your state CNAs have licenses (oh, excuse me, I meant LNAs), but really it's NOT the same thing. It's still a certification.

Okay, I hadn't seen this thread before (I was m.i.a. without an internet connection most of the summer) and all I have to say is HAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA! Perfect. My morning has been made.

And I'm happy to say I'm past all of these stages and into the "Crotchety seasoned aide" phase, where I *gasp* occasionally tell a trainee that they need to suck it up and deal with the puke, poop, etc. and if they can't, they're in the wrong line of work. Oh, the horror!

This is....AWESOME!!!!!!

Haha! This was great :D I am waiting for my test date now, but I am very glad I started reading the forums several months before my class. I was able to avoid a lot of the steps and have more realistic expectations >.

LOL! I love number 12!

Specializes in LTC.

Stage 11.5:

"Hello everyone. I'm a nursing student and I am going to be a nurse practitioner one day. During the skills lab, I made an unoccupied bed in only 11 minutes ALL BY MYSELF (amazing, right?!?). My instructor said I am so smart I can just bypass working in a nursing home and go straight into the hospital working as a PCT. How do I go about doing this?"

:lol2:

hahaha! You nailed it with the nurse practitioner thing. Or CRNA- that's another one that "everyone" is going to be.

OMG, I love this post!

Specializes in CNA.

Too funny!!

I am still a BNA, waiting to take the state exam & starting an ASN program in January. But I went through almost all those steps within the first two weeks! I like working at the LTC facility I am at, was well prepared for poop and more, and know that people are people (you're gonna like some and Ha... um, dis-like others - Nurses, aides and Residents). Great post.

Specializes in geriatrics, dementia, ortho.

:redpinkhe;) So glad someone bumped this thread! I had just been thinking about it the other day, and trying to remember all the stages - too funny! Now I gotta go search for the one about the different types of CNA's ... anyone remember that one? It was awesome too!

please help me...!

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