Young Nurse Not Taken Seriously in the Workplace

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Specializes in Mohs micrographic surgery.

Hello! I'm new here, and this is my first post, so bear with me while I am figuring it all out :)

Anyway, I am a new grad from a BSN program and I will be beginning my first position in a very busy ER in a few days. As you might expect, I am a bit nervous because I know new grads are oftentimes more of a hindrance than a help to staff, but I am willing to deal with this and do everything I can to make this transition smooth for everyone involved.

During my final semester of nursing school, I managed to get my capstone in the ER (not the same one I am employed in). During this time, I noticed that even as a student, people were trusting that I was a competent member of the team and seemed happy to have the extra hands there, that is, until my age was discovered.

I like to think that for a new grad, I am somewhat competent. I am a quick learner, graduated with a 4.0, have experience with customer service and relations, and I think this showed. My preceptor was giving me more and more freedom to do things on my own and was no longer interested in double checking every last move, until the dreaded day when the question "so how old are you anyway?" came up. I try everything in my power to not hint at the fact that I am a younger nurse (19 years old), but there are times when I have to answer questions honestly and unfortunately, eventually it comes out.

Immediately after my preceptor found out my age, she was back looking right over my shoulder constantly and began questioning me on things that she had witnessed me do correctly literally countless times (i-STAT testing, collecting urine samples, and even labeling specimen tubes). In addition, it seemed that she no longer was really interested in me as a person. Prior to this discovery she would always ask about what was going on with me, how was my boyfriend, what did I do over the weekend, etc., and would tell me a lot about herself and her life. Once she found out my age, this stopped completely. It was like a light switch flipped. One minute she saw me as a relatively competent student who she (at least appeared) to enjoy getting to know, and the next I was just some kid who she had to babysit.

As I start my new job, I am very concerned that something similar will occur but this time, with my colleagues. I want to be judged based on my competence, personability, responsibility, etc. Not on my age. Are there any recommendations out there on how to keep my age quiet without completely hiding my personal life, or how to maintain a colleagues respect once they find out that I am on the younger side? Would you personally treat a colleague differently if you found out that he/she was around my age?

Sorry for the long read, and I look forward to seeing what you all have to say!

Specializes in NICU, ICU, PICU, Academia.

How in the heck are you a BSN grad at 19? Did clinical sites know you were a minor during the program?

I may be the wrong one to ask, because I wouldn't have given any student a real ton of independence; that's just how I roll and it's never anything personal but rather just a function of the realities of the situation. It would make no difference to me if the student were 19y.o. or 50 y.o. The same would be true for a novice nurse; my handling of it is based on things other than age. The ED is another scenario where you may possess the personal attributes and knowledge base to catch on more quickly than others, but competence to operate with any large degree of independence at the beginning of an ED orientation isn't something I would expect.

I think you should expect to be treated as a novice - which is no disrespect in any way; it's just the truth. You can display aptitude for learning and critical thinking by being engaged in the work that is taking place. But, in your desire to be treated as a professional should be treated, don't reject others' good intentions or their coaching, wisdom, etc. Don't short yourself based on worrying whether people are concerned about your age or not, KWIM?

Most people will respect you in the ED based on performance. If anything, ED orientations can be short on coaching and oversight because there just isn't time. Usually new nurses are quickly given any independence/responsibility anyone might remotely think they qualify for. ;)

You can handle meeting your new work crew according to your own preferences. You could even choose to say something funny but pleasant if directly asked your age, such as:

"How old are you, anyway???" >>>> "Ha, ha - I know I look young, but don't worry, I'm old enough to be here." smile/chuckle, whatever. Or, "Oh, I know I look young, I've been told someday I'll appreciate that!"

There was a very large age difference between myself and my first preceptor. She was really awesome and helped me make a great start. Just be personable and work hard.

Don't look for trouble. :)

Come back here and let us know how it's going!

Specializes in Mohs micrographic surgery.
Specializes in Mohs micrographic surgery.

Hello!

I was able to begin college courses when I was 15, and was accepted into my BSN program as a junior directly after high school graduation. I was never a minor during clinical rotations, I met this requirement by just a few days, and I will be turning 20 here before too much longer so the timing just happened to fall together just right.

Specializes in Ambulatory Care-Family Medicine.

I know how you feel. I was 21 when I graduated with my LVN and have always been the youngest person in my workplaces until just recently. It doesn't help that I look much younger than I am either. Learn to tune out the jokes about being young (age discrimination is not just for those over 50). Don't bring up your age and try to avoid giving details that would let people know your age at least until you know them better. Honestly it gets better once your coworkers realize you're a hard worker and know your stuff. A lot of the younger generation that we are in has no work ethic so it has jaded a lot of people who have been in the workforce for a while (I'm in my late 20's now).

I currently work with a CNA who is only 18 and has a very poor work ethic so I watch her like a hawk and don't trust her too much. I also work with another CNA who just turned 21 and is an amazing worker and would trust her to take care of my family so t really depends on how you show your coworkers your work ethic. Believe me when I say that respect is earned not given and you will have to prove yourself much more just because of your age. May not be fair but it is true.

My unit had a nurse who was actually 25 or so, but literally looked like she was 14. WE took her seriously, but the patients frequently did not. I felt so bad for her.

I think you just have to pay your dues and gain your co-workers' respect with your competence.

. Prior to this discovery she would always ask about what was going on with me, how was my boyfriend, what did I do over the weekend, etc., and would tell me a lot about herself and her life.

No matter how old you are, it's just not a good idea to share too many details of your personal life with coworkers. Be pleasant, but don't cross those boundaries. I know some people disagree and consider their co-workers to be personal friends with whom they spend time outside of work, but I've found that can cause problems down the line. JMO.

Hello!

I was able to begin college courses when I was 15, and was accepted into my BSN program as a junior directly after high school graduation. I was never a minor during clinical rotations, I met this requirement by just a few days, and I will be turning 20 here before too much longer so the timing just happened to fall together just right.

I know the feeling. When they used to ask how old I was, I would just say "legal." I didn't answer age questions because I already got flack for looking young. I still get flack and I'm much older now but I still look young.

Thing is, like someone else said, you're going to get push back because you're a new grad, especially in the ED because it can get hectic. However, once you get the swing of things in your unit and show others you're capable of safe, adequate patient care and you're a team member it'll get better.

One more thing, beware of the subliminal age questions like: What year did you graduate high school? Do you know so and so, did you go to school with them? How old are hour parents? etc (Yes, I was really asked those questions)

They're just questions disguised to ask your age. Also, keep your personal life personal and your professional life professional. General discussions, fine but do not discussion personal, religious, ,or political topics at work. Keep it neutral and when those conversations come up, just listen. That's how I managed to get through things.

Specializes in ICU and Dialysis.

I was 20 when I finished my BSN and started working in an ICU residency. I was always open about it, and it never seemed to matter, with the exception of maybe 1 out of 20+ coworkers on my unit. You will be on a short leash at first, because you're going into a critical care specialty. This is normal. You've got a good bit of things to learn and the stakes on mistakes or wrong decisions can be high, so nurses who watch you closer are trying to protect you, not disrespect you. (Most of the time.)

Specializes in ER.

I also was 19 during my first year nursing. If you continue to show good judgement, hard work, and maturity, that little blip of more supervision will wear right off.

Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
Would you personally treat a colleague differently if you found out that he/she was around my age?

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Disclaimer: I never watched Doogie Howser MD.

Reclaimer: Welcome to AN.com, efoxrn! I can appreciate your situation, candor, and actions in dealing with your concern. You've gotten some good feedback from members that will hopefully get you through this unscathed.

Take heart: Someday you won't be young anymore. And please allow me to ask you this:

Don't all women lie about their age?

I know how you feel ...

I am 28 but I am petite and look younger than I actually am.

It is incredible how many people (patients and colleagues) will make comments about my age.

I have been a nurse for 6 years in ER/Trauma and I am constantly being questioned by people about 'how much experience' I have, or my favorite - "wow are you even old enough to be a nurse. Since when is it okay to talk to people about their age like this? I don't go up to an 'older looking' nurse and say "oh wow should you even bother to learn how to use the EHR since you probably should be retired?" or "wow you look like a dinosaur , how old are you 75?".

I wish that I could tell you it gets better, but it doesn't - people will continue to probably make comments/say things. I just realized that I can't change other people but I can change the way I let these things bother me or not bother me. Now I try not to let it get under my skin and always just say professionally when asked about my age "I am older than I look. I am 28 and have been a nurse 6 years" .

Best of luck to you!

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