It's about time for a new thread to breathe life into this tired forum.....
Here we go!
You know you're a male RN when:
- You constantly complain to coworkers that your scrubs are too short, (since when is 33 long a "tall"?) and you have no boobs to fill your unisex scrub top.
- You get offended glances as you eat your cheeseburger and fries at lunch from your coworkers who are on the "lean cuisine" diet...
-People assume you, having a pair, possess the superhuman strength to lift the 350lb lady in someone else's room, regardless of the fact that several of your female coworkers look tough enough to whup yer @$$...
-Your credentials should read: RN-NWP (registered nurse, nurse with prostate)
-Your PMS detection skills are at an all-time high along with your avoidance maneuver techniques...
-You feel like you're either married to, or being a daddy to everyone else in your unit....
You know you're a male nurse when the girls around you bring their lunch that consists of yogurt cups, diet coke, and pretzels. Where your meal is made up of a hungry man dinner, a snack, and the 'leaded' soda!
You know you're a male nurse when the girls around you bring their lunch that consists of yogurt cups, diet coke, and pretzels. Where your meal is made up of a hungry man dinner, a snack, and the 'leaded' soda!
Ha. So true. All the girls in my program will only eat things that are diet, reduced, or come in 100 calorie packs, while the guys are eating pizza and chips.
When the "girls" are cracking jokes and you have to stop and think through each comeback for every possible meaning....just in case.
You go for a few drinks with the "girls" and every bloke in the bar is wondering how you get that much female attention and the women are wondering what it is you have got and if they are interested....
You know exactly how crude women can be when they talk amongst themselves....and then complain about male conversations that are so much tamer....yes I heard what you said yesterday, how could this be worse than that?
You are the only one who can reach the top shelf in the supply room.
As much as you try, you still bust when someone...anyone... lets one rip out loud, all the while the women around you just shake their heads in disappointment at your immaturity.
Not imaturity, I say, just a genetic male propensity to find the inherent humour in the release of...bwahhhhhhaaaaahaaaaa :rotfl:
personally I would be laughing right along with you. Don't know what it is but I have a guys sence of humor.
lol about there being no large gloves..or if there is a box it was opened about 10 years ago.
i hide things on the top shelves of the cabinets in the med room way in the back where only i can reach. i get size 24 angios from peds and hide them on the unit for hard stick patients that the doctors will not put a line in on.
you know you are a male nurse when if you want some of the females food in the break room you just remind them how much fat is in what they are eating..i just told a nurse who brought in dunkin donuts this morning that each donut contains 18 grams of fat. Guess who ended up with the donut? those fench crullers are soo good. lol..i am evil
Or you know you're a SINGLE male RN when your surrogate mother (an older female RN) brings you a plate of Thanksgiving dinner on night shift that she saved you from her family meal...
(Love ya JH!! :loveya:)
Crashing in on the male nurse forum...
I've collected myself a few surrogate moms on the unit. I am hopeless in the kitchen, and live by myself. Just the other day I traded a home-cooked dinner for admitting a 25 weeker!
This thread is awesome! I have a few "big brother/fathers" that I work with, and they always have the best advice for me.
....you can never find large gloves on the unit, and have to carry them with you...
This one had me laughing! I'm a NICU nurse too and there are NEVER any large gloves. When I attend deliveries, I bring my own non-sterile and sterile gloves.
Most of the good one have been covered, I will try to fit some in
1) Not only are you first on call for every lift and turn that needs to be done you are first for the code purple (unruly patient).
2) You really get a good giggle at the ability to blast a really loud fart at the nurses station. You know, the kind that makes everyone stop their conversation?
3) You have greatly attuned the male ability to completely tune out a female conversation, yet perk up when your name is mentioned and act like you have been paying attention. Its like when a blind person gets better hearing, but we grow it from constant exposure to estrogen laced conversations.
4) You realize that whole 'size doesn't matter' thing is total BS when you hear your female co-workers talk about the 'poor guy with the small hoo-hoo'
5) You questioned your career choice when one of your male nursing students mutters 'my father would be so dissapointed in me' when you are sitting watching a movie on how to give a bed bath in RN school.
As much as you try, you still bust when someone...anyone... lets one rip out loud, all the while the women around you just shake their heads in disappointment at your immaturity.
Not imaturity, I say, just a genetic male propensity to find the inherent humour in the release of...bwahhhhhhaaaaahaaaaa :rotfl:
So true, but its not just the fart that gets me in tears.
I was in labor and delivery for the first time i clinical. They had me holding a leg of a tiny first time asian mother who elected to forgo the epidural.
I'm in a room full of women and the father has stepped out for a bit, shes screaming and crying, her legs are cramping up, and in the middle of contraction she lets out a toot.
In the middle of labor she stops everything, turns directly to me, and says "I so sorry"
It hurt me a little inside not to laugh out loud in the delivery room.
SteveNNP, MSN, NP
1 Article; 2,512 Posts
Ok gentlemen.... let's keep to the funny stuff...