Would you "adopt" a nurse or allow yourself to be "adopted" (For Nurses' Week)?

[Sour Lemon]

"By adopting a nurse you are sending a care package. You can reach out to who you are adopting asking for their amazon wishlist or address whichever they are comfortable with in order to send them something."

I keep seeing these "adopt me" profiles pop up on facebook, and it makes me cringe a little bit. I would feel so uncomfortable soliciting gifts from the public, but apparently a lot of people are okay with it.

Discuss. Are you up for adoption? Have you adopted a nurse? Would you do either one?

[Islandgrrl, ADN, BSN, MSN]

No way. I don’t need someone’s “feel good” charity or “heartfelt” gifts.

[llg, PhD, RN]

I read (or heard) somewhere that the whole "hero" thing has a big downside. It can be used to justify treating nurses badly -- not paying us enough or providing us with good working environments, PPE, etc. The whole idea of a "hero" is someone who sacrifices themselves for others with no expectation of being rewarded for it -- out of a sense of altruism. Such a person does not need to be well paid or otherwise treated well. That's the foundation of "heroism" and "self-sacrifice."

Whenever I see employers making a big thing about the "heroes" that work in that hospital or whatever ... I always wonder if they are hiding behind the "hero-worship" so that they don't have to treat their staff any better in every-day life.

[maydaymalone, BSN, RN]

Oh, hell yeah!

You can adopt me every week! Free lunch, Amazon gift card, sex, drugs, rock n' roll. I would accept cash donations from Osama Bin Laden knowing he made the money from selling cigarettes to grade school kids through the fence at recess...daddy needs a new pair of shoes!

[LovingPeds, MSN, APRN, NP]

Call me old school, but I was taught that as nurses it was unprofessional to accept any "expensive" or "non-sentimental" items from clients. That has stayed with me through the years. I'm uncomfortable accepting anything over a colored picture or the occasional box of chocolates or some flowers left at the nurses' station to share and enjoy.

I cringe at the thought that there could be those that have taken this opportunity to request to be adopted by the public. We're generally well-compensated professionals. We can't complain that people don't see us professionally as a group and then put ourselves up for adoption for free-stuff because of what we do as a profession...

I fortunately can only count on one hand the number of COVID-19 patients I've treated. Then only so long as to diagnose them and counsel them because thank goodness they were only having minor symptoms. I don't consider myself a front-line worker or a hero. I feel that I'm just doing my job. Save the hero-stuff for the nurses in areas hard-hit where they're struggling just to make it through the day without their patient dying or collapsing from fatigue. Those nurses don't have time to get free Starbucks, a free meal from McDonald's or Taco Bell, or to wait in line on a computer for free crocs.

A lot of my coworkers have taken the opportunity to enjoy the free 'thank you' from corporations and businesses. I don't fault them for it. Personally, I haven't taken them up on it because I don't feel that I earned it and that the people who are earning it, don't have the time to get it much less enjoy it. I also know that I am blessed to be able to afford what they're offering because of my position as a working essential worker while a lot of people are struggling to find a way to pay their bills or feed their kids. I wish that we could do more to support the nurses on the front lines and the families that are suffering due to shut-downs.

[Tenebrae, BSN, RN]

I've seen a bit of this amoung MLM companies like Arbornne, pampered chef, beach body etc where the boss babes are offering to sponser nurses by providing pamper packs etc. I'm like na, dont be using me and my professional to shill your products and level up

Our supermarkets have been offering preferential entry to front line workers with ID, so basically if there is a line we can skip it. Thats been good if I've been in a rush or not in the mood to queue, however if I'm not in a rush I'm happy to queue

[llg, PhD, RN]

I think a lot of the corporate "give aways" are really just a marketing strategy to bring in business. They need to keep their businesses open and would like to have some work for the employees to do -- as well as generate good will and potential customers for the near future and maybe even long term. I mind that type of marketing less than I do the actual "adoption" thing because I know they offer other discounts to other groups, etc. (Birthday month discounts, holiday sales, etc.)

[sevensonnets]

In my area local businesses are encouraging groups to sponsor 'your favorite nurse or teacher.' Apparently Nurses' Day has coincided with Teacher Appreciation Day, so teachers have accidently become Frontline Heroes too! On a side note, I have been adopted by a group of ladies from church so I now have 4 loaves of freshly baked yeast bread and a beautiful pepper plant. That's all the sponsoring I need.

[Uroboros, APRN]

It's interesting that the AMA gives physicians clear guidance on this. See Code of Ethics Provision 1.2.8. Although it pertains more to influential gifts on service, I'd suggest we take a hard look. To my knowledge the states I've practiced in as an RN or APRN do not have practice acts that address the issue as clear. It's all smiles and for a good cause until lawyers get involved.

[Susie2310]

On 5/7/2020 at 12:26 PM, llg said:

I read (or heard) somewhere that the whole "hero" thing has a big downside. It can be used to justify treating nurses badly -- not paying us enough or providing us with good working environments, PPE, etc. The whole idea of a "hero" is someone who sacrifices themselves for others with no expectation of being rewarded for it -- out of a sense of altruism. Such a person does not need to be well paid or otherwise treated well. That's the foundation of "heroism" and "self-sacrifice."

In my view, being a "hero" and being a "volunteer" have a number of things in common. One can pay a huge personal price for being either.

Heroism is often acknowledged after the situation is concluded. Volunteers are frequently beguiled by those recruiting them with the great benefits to mankind they will be providing. Neither have full information of what will be required of them or what the personal cost will be to them, and both are expected to be concerned with service, not with ensuring their needs are met and that their human rights are upheld.

Volunteers deserve to be treated with consideration and respect for their uniqueness as individuals, not expected to give of themselves unconditionally as this is unreasonable and unfair, but in my experience/observation happens frequently. Both are expected to "make do" with conditions and to serve altruistically, although this expectation is often not openly communicated to them upfront. Both are used as tools by some and valued accordingly; demonstrated by actions not words.

[Susie2310]

2 hours ago, Uroboros said:

It's interesting that the AMA gives physicians clear guidance on this. See Code of Ethics Provision 1.2.8. Although it pertains more to influential gifts on service, I'd suggest we take a hard look. To my knowledge the states I've practiced in as an RN or APRN do not have practice acts that address the issue as clear. It's all smiles and for a good cause until lawyers get involved.

If I remember correctly, our ANA Nurses' Code of Ethics addresses this.

[LovingLife123]

14 hours ago, Uroboros said:

It's interesting that the AMA gives physicians clear guidance on this. See Code of Ethics Provision 1.2.8. Although it pertains more to influential gifts on service, I'd suggest we take a hard look. To my knowledge the states I've practiced in as an RN or APRN do not have practice acts that address the issue as clear. It's all smiles and for a good cause until lawyers get involved.

Lawyers getting involved in my free meal from McDonalds or a celebrity buy OMG the whole hospital lunch?

It’s one thing if somebody is giving you a gift for personally treating them or enticing you to give them specialized care over others, but this is different. Don’t confuse the two.

[Uroboros, APRN]

12 hours ago, Susie2310 said:

If I remember correctly, our ANA Nurses' Code of Ethics addresses this.

That's a great point, as does nearly every alphabet soup of business associations, because they are all founded on loose ethics? Why don't you share specifically with us which code you are referring to? Although, quoting even the ANA won't save anyone in front of their respective BON if there is conflict with practice wording in that state. What state do you work in? Does your BON say anything about nurse gifting?