Working with all females - fringe benefit or danger zone?

Nurses Men

Published

I am a middle aged lawyer starting the LVN program in Oct. I have chosen nursing as the last and, I think, the most rewarding career of my working life. My career path has been from engineer, real estate broker, pilot, certified personal trainer, to lawyer, all male dominated professions. Now I am entering a field dominated by females. My CNA class is 40/4 female. My first impression is that this is a great plus since I am single, no g/f, and looking for a serious relationship. I have dated nurses in the past and have always admired their dedication and ethics. I recognize that I should avoid involvement with females on my own floor/unit but what about those in other areas of the hospital, nursing home, etc? What do nurses think/feel about dating male nurses? What do the female docs think/feel about the male nurses? What do you think will be the reaction of the nursing staff when they find out that I am also a lawyer? I would not want that to detract from my duties as a health care worker.

Specializes in Emergency Dept, ICU.

It was a fringe benefit until I got married

Now it's a danger zone. And I'm good too. I don't do anything, but my wife still has issues.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
I think the reason that it can be difficult to work with some women these days is because of all the sexual abuse they had to put up with for so long. I'm careful now about the jokes I tell but I haven't lost my sense of humor and I can usually find a patient or a female colleague willing to hear a joke. I don't repeat foul, dirty jokes.

So what if a female colleague asks suggestive questions about a man's body parts? I would consider it a compliment but would change the subject. You have to respect their rights and they have to respect yours. I don't worry over charges of sexual harrassment....I'm confident in my abilities as a nurse and I think I can convince any jury of my innocence of the charges and make the plaintiff look really stupid and incompetent, along with any supervisor who sided with her in the process.

We all have our personal standards of behavior and especially in the workplace a woman has no business asking me if I'm circumcised or not anymore than I would ask her graphic questions about her genitalia. And I realize there are excellent and professional reasons why a female nurse would want to ask a male colleague about circumcision. This is not the context I am talking about. When someone is being a nosey twenty-year-old twit there's a difference. We know that if a man were to do the same to a woman it would be automatic sexual harrassment accusations, if not worse. We also know that a woman can get away with what a man can't but I don't feel a need to play by those rules. Those kinds of conversations are inappropriate and I don't get paid to tolerate it.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Wow what a great coincidence. I am at a crossroads deciding between becoming a lawyer or an RN. Can I ask why are you walking away from being an attorney? As far as will people think differently of you because you are an attorney, people only know what you tell them.

I would love to hear why you are chosing to change professions and why you think becoming an RN is a good solution for you?

Are you planning on continuing your career as an attorney with your RN as a asset to your practice?

lay it on me I really want to hear whats what?

Thats one thing I enjoy about nursing. I'm still just taking my pre-reqs but already, Ive run into so many interesting people with a wide variety of backgrounds.

I was actually a law student at a tier 1 school. After my first year, I realized that i'd be miserable being a lawyer and I dropped out to apply to nursing school. When people hear this they act like I threw away a winning lottery ticket (especially those who knew how hard I worked to get into law school). What they don't know is that the legal profession is one of the most dreadful, monotonous, and depressing professions there are. Furthermore, getting a JD doesn't guarantee you a ticket to upper middle class/upper class social/financial status. Quite the contrary....youd be surprised how many law school graduates have over $100k of debt and cant find a job.

Anyway....enough about me. Here are some good links.

http://www.jdunderground.com/thread.php?threadId=5710

http://lawandletters.blogspot.com/2007/11/why-you-shouldnt-go-to-law-school.html

http://www.elsblog.org/the_empirical_legal_studi/2007/09/distribution-of.html

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ER/OR.
Thats one thing I enjoy about nursing. I'm still just taking my pre-reqs but already, Ive run into so many interesting people with a wide variety of backgrounds.

I was actually a law student at a tier 1 school. After my first year, I realized that i'd be miserable being a lawyer and I dropped out to apply to nursing school. When people hear this they act like I threw away a winning lottery ticket (especially those who knew how hard I worked to get into law school). What they don't know is that the legal profession is one of the most dreadful, monotonous, and depressing professions there are. Furthermore, getting a JD doesn't guarantee you a ticket to upper middle class/upper class social/financial status. Quite the contrary....youd be surprised how many law school graduates have over $100k of debt and cant find a job.

Anyway....enough about me. Here are some good links.

http://www.jdunderground.com/thread.php?threadId=5710

http://lawandletters.blogspot.com/2007/11/why-you-shouldnt-go-to-law-school.html

http://www.elsblog.org/the_empirical_legal_studi/2007/09/distribution-of.html

So true. There are so many law schools now that anyone can find one to get into. The market has been bumrushed. Now, if you arent in a Tier 1 school, you will be lucky to get a 35K/yr job in local government somewhere while trying to pay back over 100K in debt.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in None.
So true. There are so many law schools now that anyone can find one to get into. The market has been bumrushed. Now, if you arent in a Tier 1 school, you will be lucky to get a 35K/yr job in local government somewhere while trying to pay back over 100K in debt.

The last two posts are not from lawyers. I got my JD in 1981 and never made less than $80K in my career. I have never heard of any lawyer that is not making a decent living. Anyway I stopped practicing law, not because I didn't have cases, but because I wanted to do something less stressfull, like nursing.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
The last two posts are not from lawyers. I got my JD in 1981 and never made less than $80K in my career. I have never heard of any lawyer that is not making a decent living. Anyway I stopped practicing law, not because I didn't have cases, but because I wanted to do something less stressfull, like nursing.

This is true. I am not a lawyer. However I was a law student and I am well aware of the status of the legal profession as it stands now. I'm sure you would agree that the profession is very different than it was when you finished law school and began practicing. For one, your tuition probably cost $10k/yr or less. These days, most law schools are at least $25k/yr (unless you go instate) and many more are over $35k/yr. Furthermore, there were far fewer accredited law schools than there is now. The ABA is accrediting more law schools even now as graduates are struggling to find jobs. The increased debt load, the glut of attorneys, and the horrible job market is crushing recent grads.

I went to a law school ranked in the 30s and some of my friends that I keep in touch with from school are having a horrible time finding employment. One or two who finished in the top 10-15% after 1L year will probably find good summer employment their 2L year getting paid $2500/week which will probably lead to associate positions. But every other upperclassman i talked to (9/10) had a hard time finding a place to work (even for free) if they didn't go to a top 14 school or finish in the top 10% of their class. Whats even worse, is that some who have graduated and passed the bar can't find any permanent employment so they've resorted to being a temp. attorney - something you don't want to wish on your worst enemy.

http://temporaryattorney.blogspot.com/

Times have changed for the legal profession...for the worst I'm afraid.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ER/OR.
The last two posts are not from lawyers. I got my JD in 1981 and never made less than $80K in my career. I have never heard of any lawyer that is not making a decent living. Anyway I stopped practicing law, not because I didn't have cases, but because I wanted to do something less stressfull, like nursing.

1981 was 27 years ago (my birth year!). Times have changed, bud. Now, law schools are popping up like Subways. I know several buddies of mine who regret the high debt for the law school because there are too many lawyers now. If you go to Yale or Harvard, you're set...sure. But even those lawyers making lots work unGodly 70-80 hrs a week at times. The prestige in law is gone. The Wall Street Journal just had an article about the thousands of law students each year not able to find work or working outside of law for trinkets. The 1980's "LA Law" heydays are over. My aunt is an RN who makes over 95K a year. Nursing shortages are increasing nursing pay, while lawyer overabundance is stifling their pay. Its all basic supply and demand.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Family Nurse Practitioner.

I personally can appreciate a man with a long package....but only when applying a Texas cath...lol. I am straight and I work as a tech with an all female RN crew. The following are true(so far as I have found)

1. all the pretty ones are married

2. all the other ones are crazy

3. those that remain are weight or height challenged

4. then the rest are crazy and heavy and ugly with bad personalities

I graduate next May from RN college..so then I can be crazy ugly and heavy too..ROCK ON!!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Family Nurse Practitioner.

Actually the original poster said he was in CNA school I believe...he is becoming an RN piece by piece. By 2050 he will graduate Medical school.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Rehab.
Working with women is definately Danger Zone. Start a new job and ur fresh meat. While this can come in handy in motivating some women, it can get to be dangerous when they get ur number off the call list and start txting you all hours of the day. You can't really be blunt and tell them ur not interested or it will cause strife at work, so ur stuck between a rock and a hard place until your newness wears off and you settle in.

I've tried everything... telling them I'm gay, I have a girlfriend, etc, nothing really works - if anything it seems to boost the number of advances if you are unavailable.

Its a careful balancing act. I would advise any male nurse to NOT date anyone at work. I've done it, it can get very ugly.

I'm goin to buy a wedding band when I go to Vegas in Nov, see how that affects things. I've started agency nursing recently and I'm fresh meat everywhere I go now /sigh

Gawsh....you have it hard huh??? The trials and tribulations of the male nurse LOL.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Working with women is definately Danger Zone. Start a new job and ur fresh meat. While this can come in handy in motivating some women, it can get to be dangerous when they get ur number off the call list and start txting you all hours of the day. You can't really be blunt and tell them ur not interested or it will cause strife at work, so ur stuck between a rock and a hard place until your newness wears off and you settle in.

I've tried everything... telling them I'm gay, I have a girlfriend, etc, nothing really works - if anything it seems to boost the number of advances if you are unavailable.

Its a careful balancing act. I would advise any male nurse to NOT date anyone at work. I've done it, it can get very ugly.

I'm goin to buy a wedding band when I go to Vegas in Nov, see how that affects things. I've started agency nursing recently and I'm fresh meat everywhere I go now /sigh

Tell them you're not interested and it causes strife? I say cause strife. That's their problem, not yours. You're there to do the job, not fulfill the romantic fantasies of a few immature co-workers.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Ward,Er,Or.

there is a higher ratio of female nurses to male nurses but where i work male nurses are the muscles there always put in the er and ward firstly the once who lifts patients but for the fringe benefit or danger zone i tell you i have seen an angry husband and an angry wife storming in my workplace because of there jealousy and insicurities from there other halfs workmates if your married and your other half is also has alot of jealousy and insicurities then i say danger zone but if your single like me :D then it's fringe benefit

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Add a Comment