Work situation not unique to health care

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One of the other pharmacists where I work is a mother of two - a 3-year-old and a 6-month-old. All day, every day, all she does is whine about how the kids kept her up all night, she has no time to herself, she has to follow her husband around the house because he does everything wrong (example: he will cook dinner and she will take it off the stove and cook something else because it isn't what she wants to eat), her husband is always leaving her alone to deal with the kids by herself (hello, it's because he has a job!), etc. etc. etc.

I want to scream at her, "YOU TALKED LIKE THIS WHEN YOU ONLY HAD ONE CHILD! DID YOU THINK A SECOND CHILD WOULD IMPROVE THAT SITUATION? DON'T PEOPLE THINK ABOUT THINGS LIKE THIS BEFORE THEY GET PREGNANT?"

But I am childless so I keep my mouth shut. Problem is, everyone else does too.

It's gotten to a point where I almost don't want to go to work, and I know I'm not the only person who feels this way. What do I do?

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Specializes in School Nursing.

Unfortunately.....you will probably just have to grin and bare it ! I have a similar situation where I work and this particular person never shut's up about another

co-worker. All of their mistakes and such.....

I get soooo tired of hearing it, but I know that once I say something, then I will regret it.

So I just hold my tongue.....mind you it's raw by now !!

Good luck with this !

Praiser :heartbeat

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Specializes in Maternal - Child Health.

When people whine incessently, it is usually because they are getting some kind of desired feedback. (Not necessarily from you, but from someone.) Most people eventually shut up if/when they realize that no-one is listening, responding or giving a c**p.

I would recommend that every time she bit**es about her family, you say something like this, "Sorry to hear that. Now, do you have Mr. Smith's IVF ready?" or "That's too bad. Can you fill this Vicodin Rx now please?"

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I have a friend who was complaining that her 14-year-old son was driving her crazy. She knew it was a phase but she was almost considering sending him to live with his dad - it was that bad. I should add that her ex-husband lived nearby, their relationship was amicable, and he was a good father, but still.........

And a few months later, he was on a camping trip with his dad, collapsed with what turned out to be a brain aneurysm, and died in his father's arms.

:crying2:

After this, she would have done anything to have her son drive her crazy once again. Her daughter recently had a baby - her first grandchild - and named him after her brother.

:flowersfo

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Specializes in ICU/ER.

I have a very sarcastic sense of humor so I would probably say something like "There is always foster care" next time she complains about the kids keeping her up at night. Or "have you ever tried duct tape?"

I work with a mother of apparently the 2 most beautiful intelligent toddlers ever...and one night after I couldnt stand hearing the babytalk about sweet Matilda and Madalyn any longer I looked at another nurse and said "gee it is true a shame she just doesnt love those children" we both had a good laugh and the bragger got the point...

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We have a technician who talks incessantly about her children, but we let her because she is going through a very nasty divorce and those kids are the only thing that's kept her going. (Dated 4 years and never once discussed having kids - what do you expect? But we keep our mouths shut about that too.)

There is another technician whose son has multiple disabilities, including profound mental retardation, and I have only heard her complain about him once and that was when her dad was terminally ill. Maybe the whiny mom would like to care for him for a while and she might appreciate what she has a little more. :rolleyes:

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I agree with racing-mom4 I also have a sarcastic sense of humor. Use humor. Athough I do think that people with children tend to do this..I being one of those. I have 4 children ages 14,11,10,8, and I am well aware that people don't always care to hear about the daily grind of raising them. It is somewhat inconsiderate because there are some others whom for whatever reason do not have children, and imposing your children complaints/stories is self-centered it can exclude others from participating in the conversation and that is RUDE. I will talk about these things only if the person and I have common ground..Now as far as her whining, she is probably a negative person and if she didn't have the kids she would be whining about her cats or whatever else is occupying her time. I call people like that darkworkers...kind of like a vampire sucking out your energy. One good technique is to immediately respond to her comments with a positive one such as "Well what do you like about your kids?" or just change the topic altogether such as "Did you know that for every decade that passes our brain capacity to respond quickly diminishes by 10%?" I am serious, she will get the hint. Sometimes people are so used to being negative they do not even realize how that negativity permmiates all their thoughts and conversations. I hope you don't continue to feel sick about this...

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Specializes in FNP, Peds, Epilepsy, Mgt., Occ. Ed.

Those of us who have kids find it maddening, too. I once worked in very close quarters with someone who had to tell everyone about everything going on with her kid, so by the end of the day I'd heard it 5 or 6 times. She was very lucky I didn't strangle her with the phone cord.

Like Irish, I try to keep my talk about mine to a minimum, and to always take an interest in other people's kids (or pets, or parents, or whatever keeps them busy or up at night), too.

And don't get me started on people who voluntarily get pregnant, not for the first time, then complain every time they eat about morning sickness. Especially when the same thing made them sick, oh, the last three or four times they ate it!!!

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I should also add that this woman uses the word "babysitting" in reference to caring for her own children.

huh?

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That is very sad...

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Specializes in Home Care, Hospice, OB.
i should also add that this woman uses the word "babysitting" in reference to caring for her own children.

huh?

good grief!!

it's a pet peeve of mine when fathers refer to being alone with their kids as "babysitting".

who does this mother think she is babysitting for???

btw-my favorite niece graduates this week as a pharmacist..any words of wisdom to pass along???:clown:

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good grief!!

it's a pet peeve of mine when fathers refer to being alone with their kids as "babysitting".

who does this mother think she is babysitting for???

btw-my favorite niece graduates this week as a pharmacist..any words of wisdom to pass along???:clown:

if i've ever heard a man refer to caring for his own kids as "babysitting", i can't recall it. i've heard men (and women too) describe it that way until they have their own kids, and women have talked about their husbands doing that too, although it's more common if they're his stepchildren.

tell your niece that walgreens:monkeydance::barf02: does pay well, and has a plum retirement program, but no amount of money is worth doing that to yourself. but she probably knows that already.

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