Why Can't Spouses and Families Understand The NOC Schedule?

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I'm back to working full time nocs after working full time days for the past 4 years, worked full time nocs for quite a few years before that. You'd think my husband would have somewhat of understanding about my sleep time, work schedule, ect... Nope, he doesn't. Never has. Today he decided to make Cinco de Mayo plans of drinks and appetizers at a local Mexican restaurant at 7pm. I start my 4 day stretch tonight, my shift starts at 10. He doesn't understand why I can't go!! Ummm margaritas three hours before my shift starts?! Not only that, I like to lay down before my shift after I've been off for a few days. I laid down early today because I haven't felt good and he wanted to know what I was doing!!!! SMH... I don't think he'll ever get it.

Specializes in Cardio-Pulmonary; Med-Surg; Private Duty.
Hope it included the lists Elvish and I posted! :)

My standard list for "things it is appropriate to interrupt an adult for" back when he was little was "blood, vomit, fire -- otherwise shut your trap and wait your turn" (I really hate kids who interrupt... one of my peeves).

Now that he's 14yo, I just explained to him that when I say I *need* to sleep, I really, really, really NEED TO SLEEP and he'd better have a justifiable excuse for waking me... and he hasn't woken me since! LOL

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Specializes in Cardio-Pulmonary; Med-Surg; Private Duty.

Sounds like some of us need to post this on the bedroom door:

sleep_zps0e90f581.jpg

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Specializes in Neuro ICU and Med Surg.

My issue were my friends who work M-F 9-5 who would call when I was asleep and would not understand why I got mad. I don't call them at 0200 just to talk. They always said that they never knew when to call because I work nights. I just told them to call me after 5 most days, and it would be ok. It took one a while to finally get it. I just turned off every ringer to the phone and told my mom to only use my cell in an emergency.

One night staffing called me at 6am after I got off work at 0400 and wanted me to come in on day shift. I had yelled at her. I got pulled into the office. I told my manager I was at home and could yell at someone who should have known better than to call someone who worked until 0400 if they wanted to work at 0700. I wouldn't apologize for being rude. I finally called staffing and said NEVER to call for overtime again.

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My husband works nights too so, he is awesome about letting me sleep. Some of our family members on the other hand just don't get it. My mil hasn't done this in years but, she used to come over and knock on our bedroom window while we were asleep. I'd wake up and go look out our heavily curtained and aluminium foiled windows and there she'd be trying to peek in! Ugh. She does occasionally call my husband back to back and leave messages like "you never answer my calls", "I guess you'll never call me back", "you must not love me anymore" (she's very dramatic) We just leave the phone on silent and call her back when we wake up.

My dad always wants to come over on my first day off, I'll get home around 10a or 11a and he'll show up around 2 or 3p. I'll always tell him "I was sleeping" and he'll say, "that's OK you didn't take too long to get to the door" and just come on in. Ugh, I wasn't apologizing I was trying to get you to go away. Then when I try and Shoo him off he gets his feelings hurt and I feel guilty.

I help my grandmother with her housework sometimes and she always wants me to come over on my first day off and I've tried to explain to her that I don't get home till after 10a and she always says "10pm?!, I thought you were off?" I also try to explain that I can't stay awake for 30+ hours. After 10 years no one seems to understand that I need to sleep during the day after a 12 hr nightshift.

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It bothers me too when I have to work with someone who never sleeps during the day but, still works nightshift. I know nights aren't for everyone and some people do have a hard time sleeping. I've worked with people who won't sleep because they feel like they are missing something, they are afraid their kids are making a mess, their family won't let them etc. Over the years I've worked with many people who seriously won't sleep at all or will take like an hour nap and then come to work then I feel like I have to babysit them because their head starts bobbing every 20 minutes, it's so annoying. I worked with a woman once who would work a 12hr shift, get off and go to a theme park with her family (they had season passes and would go every week in the summer) and then comeback in to work that night, I had to struggle all night to keep her awake. I don't do anything on my work days, Idk how people do that.

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Specializes in Med-Surg, Emergency, CEN.
Great idea, but how in the world did you get him to agree to stay up and clean all night?

I got him to treat it like a contest: "Are you tough enough to live by my schedule?"

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Specializes in ICU.

Why can't managers, who once had to do night shift themselves understand? I have been called every day this week to come in early or do an extra night - after I've just finished one, at about 1100hrs each morning. :no: Not impressed.

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