Where do we draw the line with abuse towards nurses?

[Jahans Mommy]

Recently at my facility, there was a family member who gained a quick reputation for being extremely verbally abusive towards our staff. He told the CNA she was a 'bedpan fetcher' and that her job was disgusting, and repeatedly told the RN that she was incompetent. It turned out that this family member was a prominent member of the local healthcare community, and was very well known by the 'higher ups.'

Who do you go to in such a case? His behavior was BEYOND unprofessional. Our management was aware of this situation, as was the CEO/President and the CNO of our hospital. No one said anything to this man regarding his behavior. Unfortunately nurses deal with verbal assaults from patients/families all too often, but I think with this man's status, it created a very unique situation.

I'm just curious to know what others' experiences are and policies they have in place related to patient abuse towards staff.

[HonestyAlways]

This saddens me as a member of management in healthcare. Last night I learned of a 'pack' of family members that have been bullying the staff. I just joined this facility as the nursing director and when I heard of this abusive behavior, I took action on behalf of the staff. I personally spoke with each family involved and let them know that it would not be tolerated. Furthermore, the families were informed that if these situations occurred again, the resident would be discharged. One family member became somewhat aggressive with me but I shut him down and showed him the door. There is never an excuse to allow families to be abusive or bully the staff. I truly believe that it is my responsibility to protect the staff against unreasonable actions and to promote positive working environments.

[TriciaJ, RN]

This saddens me as a member of management in healthcare. Last night I learned of a 'pack' of family members that have been bullying the staff. I just joined this facility as the nursing director and when I heard of this abusive behavior, I took action on behalf of the staff. I personally spoke with each family involved and let them know that it would not be tolerated. Furthermore, the families were informed that if these situations occurred again, the resident would be discharged. One family member became somewhat aggressive with me but I shut him down and showed him the door. There is never an excuse to allow families to be abusive or bully the staff. I truly believe that it is my responsibility to protect the staff against unreasonable actions and to promote positive working environments.

Please have yourself cloned. We all need someone like you!

[martymoose, BSN, RN]

The sense of entitlement is disgusting to me and has made me cut my hopes of staying at bedside nursing or even management and limited me to staying at the bedside for a few more years.

yes and yes

hopefully someday they will run out of nurses and then be sol.and not be taken care of at all.

one can dream

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

Op, make sure you cover yourself. As soon as the word "incompetent" comes up, is when I would direct to the employee relations department and/or your charge nurse/in house supervisor.

People can be jerks and idiots. There are some (and I use the term some loosely) family members who do not handle their loved one being in the hospital, so act out to try and quell their own anxiety.

So lets go on that--Social work consult for complicated family dynamics needing intervention. Perhaps the social worker can set this patient up in the family member's home with 24 hour private duty care......

Remember, the patient can not control the family member's behavior. And your obligation as a nurse is to the patient. I would report the verbal abuse as I am sure it is not making for a therapeutic environment for the patient.

I would not attempt to deal with this alone. You need multi-disciplined assistance.

[Libby1987]

We don't tolerate any form of abuse however there is a wide disparity in our staff's soft skills in both avoiding and diffusing patients and their caregivers' anxiety, frustration and aggravation. And knowing that, in some cases we resolve the escalations differently.

[MedChica]

Usually, visitors with abusive personalities tend to inflict their crazy on the CNAs. Now, I've dealt with my fair share of that.

They complain to and around housekeeping and the aides about the facility and 'the staff' as though they don't even work there. It's odd. When 'we' come around, the visitor's all smiles. What problem? There's no problem. "I was just wondering - my mother..."

I usually don't realize that the family members are like that until the aide(s) tell me. If the member has a legit complaint? Okay. The aide's wrong. I'll handle it. If our folks are doing their job - especially our good aides -and being belittled, though? It really frosts my biscuits when people are mean and ugly to our aides.

I'm familiar with trying visitors but being proactive works. Greet with a smile, introduce yourself, answer questions and let them know that you're available. Pretty sure that few on here will be a fan of that. I'm just saying: We're in the people biz and customer Service skills help. I've seen nurses avoid problem visitors and those rumored to be a problem. I think that's setting yourself up for failure. You'll work harder in the end because people like that will see you busting tail and CONTINUE bothering - yes, bothering - you throughout the shift because 'it's your job', they've got a bone to pick with "the staff", they think you're what they fear and so you become the staff representative and outlet for their frustration.

Set their mind at ease in the beginning and you're not likely to have such problems.

Ive never been on the rec'ving end of the behavior you're talking about. When I do, may be jobless by close of business and I've never been fired so don't think I'm blase about the matter. All I can about that? The thirty second dressing down will have been worth it. lol A good tell-off doesn't take forever.

Now, I've gotten 'into it' with visitors, yes. They're never for my patients, though. They're usually just frustrated, can't locate THEIR nurse and figure, "Guess I'll show my tail and take my anger out on any nurse I see." Uh, no. You're going to find a corner and sit your crazed behind down in it, is what you're gonna do. You wanna 'cuss' and yell? Do it in your car. Not in this facility, upsetting the residents.