When Good Phone Calls to the Doctor Go Bad

Being a seasoned nurse now, it doesn't bother me much at all, to have to call. However, back when I first began my RN career, there were doctors that would make me shake and shudder in my NurseMates, just at the thought of having to call them. So, it was nice to occasionally have something to laugh about after making that two AM phone call. ?

One night, pretty late, I had to call a general practitioner about one of her partner's patients. I dialed her pager number, put in my number, hung up the phone, and waited. I waited about a half an hour when I heard a phone ring... in a PATIENT'S room. "That's strange," I thought. "Those phones aren't supposed to ring this late." I went into the room, picked up the phone, and was like.... "..Hello??"

"Hello???" the voice on the other end said. It was the doctor that I had paged! I laughed, then told her what I needed.

Fortunately, it was an EMPTY room. I could just imagine some poor, confused patient answering that phone, at two am!

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Then there was the time that I had to page the orthopedist, about one of his patients. Now, this particular doctor had a reputation for being old and crotchety, grumpy on the phone... and he also had a reputation for being a drunk. Now, I certainly don't know whether this particular bit of information was actually true, but... well... I'll just NEVER know what was going on at the other end, this particular evening...

My patient had, in her words, "fallen on her fat butt", while attempting to get up and use her bedside commode on her own. I helped her back into bed, checked her for bruises or other markings.. she assured me that she had no new pain and did not feel like she had hurt herself further... and then I went to page her doctor, our dear orthopedist.

I paged him once, with no return call. I then paged him a second time, still with no reply. The third time, I tried calling his home phone. I dialed the number... his phone was ringing... it rang about five times until I heard someone pick up. Silence, no "Hello?" or anything. "Hello, Dr. So-and-So?" I said. More silence.. and then, this is what I heard:

"..BLLLAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" *click!*

Well..... since there was no emergency or anything, I simply filled out the incident report, charted that I was not able to reach the doctor, had a nice little chuckle, and went on. In retrospect, I guess maybe I should have had someone go to the doc's house and make sure that this person, WHOMEVER it was that actually answered the phone (for all I know, it was the doctor's drunken son or somebody), was okay!

Whatever the case was... that doctor WASN'T taking any calls that night.