When asked for advice

My answer is always you need to see a Doctor. If they start being a pest about it,I tell them they have cancer and REALLY need to see a doctor.

My hubby and I used to go to a large yearly group campout and one couple we always camped with was a Doctor and his family They were friends long before he became a doc. He started pulling away because people hounded him to death for free medical care until he and his wife just dissappeared. I was mad for a long time but I understand why.

INTERESTING topic.... Here's a cautionary tale.....

I was an assistant head nurse on an open heart unit. My mother-in-law had a PTCA catheter break off in her right coronary artery during a failed PTCA. The open heart surgeon asked me to go with him when he explained risks/benefits for the surgery; essentially she could refuse the surgery and go home with this piece of catheter in her right coronary artery ( which could embolize at any time) OR she could have open heart surgery with all the risks. He then said, "well, I'll leave you towo to talk". At the time, the relationship between my husband and his family were distant, so we were not close.

She looked at me with horror......"what should I do???" Everything in me wanted to say "Have the surgery". The surgeon was truly gifted and I had absolute faith in him. Something in me made me pause. With with tears streaming down my face, I reviewed the risk and benefits of BOTH options with her again. I also told he that as much as I wanted to tell her what I would do, I could not, because it needed to be her decision.

She opted for surgery the next day. About one hour post-op, she arrested. Despite agressive rescuscitsation attempts she died..... at the age of 50.

I was SO relieved I hadn't pushed my opinion on her. I would have had to live with that for the rest of my life.I think of her and the situation every time I get tempted to 'advise'..... You just never know when a strange outcome may occur:uhoh3:

INTERESTING topic.... Here's a cautionary tale.....

I was an assistant head nurse on an open heart unit. My mother-in-law had a PTCA catheter break off in her right coronary artery during a failed PTCA. The open heart surgeon asked me to go with him when he explained risks/benefits for the surgery; essentially she could refuse the surgery and go home with this piece of catheter in her right coronary artery ( which could embolize at any time) OR she could have open heart surgery with all the risks. He then said, "well, I'll leave you towo to talk". At the time, the relationship between my husband and his family were distant, so we were not close.

She looked at me with horror......"what should I do???" Everything in me wanted to say "Have the surgery". The surgeon was truly gifted and I had absolute faith in him. Something in me made me pause. With with tears streaming down my face, I reviewed the risk and benefits of BOTH options with her again. I also told he that as much as I wanted to tell her what I would do, I could not, because it needed to be her decision.

She opted for surgery the next day. About one hour post-op, she arrested. Despite agressive rescuscitsation attempts she died..... at the age of 50.

I was SO relieved I hadn't pushed my opinion on her. I would have had to live with that for the rest of my life.I think of her and the situation every time I get tempted to 'advise'..... You just never know when a strange outcome may occur:uhoh3:

Wow, that story breaks my heart!

Thank you for sharing.

Tait

PS. The only person who asks me for free medical advice is my father, and he stopped shortly after I told him it was $25 every time he wanted me to check his BP or listen to his heart.

The best advice is just don't give advice. With a license, you're an RN 24/7, tell them to seek the advice of their physician.

Years ago, I tried to give my father some advice, and he wouldn't listen to me. He would rather listen to a med tech 1/2 my age, with almost no experience. I told him he paid a lot of money for my education, and he should take advantage of his investment. When my advice turned out to be correct, he started to listen to me. My mom was even tougher, but she would go to the doc when I insisted.

I try to avoid giving advice to friends. I usually just say that there are too many different choices, please go to your doc.