What's your reason for putting up with it?

[canigraduate]

Hello, all!

I have been a CNA for a little over a year now as I am transitioning into the health care field. During this time, I have observed the nurses I work with, who happen to be all female so far.

I have noticed nearly every female nurse I have worked with puts up with things that would shock someone not in healthcare. Things that would get you arrested if you tried them outside of a facility. Things that I personally can't tolerate.

What I want to know is, if you are a nurse that puts up with these actions, why do you do it? Is it for job security? Are you a submissive person? Do you feel that you deserve the things that people do to you? Do you think it's lack of education about what is and isn't appropriate behavior? Or maybe it's due to the accepted culture of a workplace?

This isn't for a class or anything, I just really would like to know what the motivation is.

Thanks in advance for your replies!

[nurseguysfinishfirst]

If the most confused patient at your facility (at least in PA) makes an accusation against the best employee in a facility,a full investigation must be done.This can include questioning by law enforcement and an employee having to defend themselves about something that everyone knows is ridiculous.I have never been accused myself but have been questioned about other employees twice (different facilities and employees)just because I was on the same unit during the same shift.

Ya,I see the reason for this but it does speak to the same respect issue.

A patient can verbally abuse ,defame,ridicule,insult or sexually harass a nurse and it is blown off as part of the job by everyone.

One false move by a nurse and you are defending your license.

I was called out of the bathroom by a state inspector once to be reviewed for my noon med pass. It was a joke to everyone (including me at the time) but think about it.

[owlcrn]

i have heard of several of these incidents happening. i however have witnessed many times a nurse put md's and patients families back on the right track in very good ways. i love it when my favorite mentor says to either. "now hold on here just a minute, this kind of talk will get us nowhere. we need to just focus on ....." or "i just don't know why you would say such a thing, please now, come on dr., let's just get on with this and make it as pleasant as possible."

i also have found that when the other nurses who are in earshot of this nonsense come to the rescue or stand beside a nurse who may be under attack seems to also work. i think that too many times nurses are so shocked by this behavior they are without words.

i personally believe that as a nurse i am to be the advocate for those who have no voice that may be my fellow coworker.

actually i think it is all our responsibility. in life and work.

anyone else have any good ways to stop this nonsense?

[PAMaleRN]

The female nurse needs to take some responsibility and attempt to curtail being harrassed. If a patient inappropriately touches her, she needs to immediately respond to the situation and tell the person that his or her actions are offensive and inappropriate. This is the first step in dealing with situations such as this. Running to the manager shouldn't be the first course of action. The nurse needs to stand up for herself and if the incidents continue, then the manager should intervene.

[nana52]

I work in ltc & have often seen the breast/butt-grabbers. The reply they get from staff is "that is not appropriate! That may need to be repeated more than once, but if done consistently by all affected, it does work.:)

[cjmiller29]

My answer will be it depends on the situation and how I perceive the situation. My primary goal is to take care of the person lying in that bed. Whatever it takes to meet that goal is what I do. If a doctor treats me disrespectfully or walks away, I just don't let it bother me because he/she is the one that is in the wrong, not me. I've seen people run to the bosses if DR So-So did XYZ with the result of completely losing the MD's respect. It was more important to me to earn their respect by doing my job irregardless of even their behavior. It is now to the point that they will usually listen to me because I've saved their reputations too many times.

As for patients, I can take a lot of from them because for the most part, they are usually unaware of what they are doing. Even an AAOX4 patient who is flinging poo is not right in their head when you think about it. Who in their right mind would do that? I will say if I know the person is aware of what they are doing and are just rude, my treatment of the situation is much different then if they are confused.

I don't need glory or care about the opinion of others, I just want to be able to look myself in the mirror at the end of the day and know I've done the best job I could do at the time.

[cjmiller29]

I will also add that the MD's have also found when they haven't listened to me and I was right, they will receive no quarter from me also. You can ask the idiot who was booted back to Canada when he caused the demise of his patient due to treating him as an OD and using medical malpractice by not checking his head CT before performing an LP. I've never had so much satisfaction putting someone in their place after that one. I was dancing after he left.

I guess I've just been doing this so long, I've developed a thick skin and frankly don't care when people act like children. It just doesn't bother me anymore. Not being listened to when the situation warrants it, now that does.

[cosmicsun]

job security.

[GM2RN]

Patients are exempt from this because they are sick and nobody is their best when they are sick. Family members are also exempt because they are concerned about their loved ones. Most co-workers are cut some slack because they are working right by your side and they deserve your respect, but management, they treat their employees like crap. Always adding and changing the rules. Never taking responsibility for problems, always preaching and never listening. It doesn't matter that you are also a professional and deserve some respect. We all worked hard to get where we are. Stop pointing fingers and start patting us on the back once in awhile.

Exempt? EXEMPT?!? Is this a serious comment or are you being sarcastic?

[GM2RN]

We put up with patient's because we care right? Am I wrong? Because if we don't care about the well being of other people- these sick people, what are we doing? The person who is acting out did not always like this, they are sick, they have dementia, they are scared, they are dying. The list goes on. And that is why I stated that the patient is exempt from us saying it is a chore to put up with them. Their is alot of crap that I have a tough time putting up with in the health care industry, but the patient isn't one of them. They are the reason I put up with it.

Yes, you are wrong. You couldn't be MORE wrong (with the exception of the demented pt.) Putting up with bad behaviour, even from people who are sick, just reinforces it and guarantees that you will get more of it.

[hubcap56]

As a male nurse, it has been my observation that the mistreatment of nurses is, for the most part, a very sexist activity. As a hospice nurse, I deal with patients and family members who are extremely stressed. I care for patients in hospitals, nursing homes, assisted living centers, and their own homes. In six years I have never been physically or verbally abused but I know many of my female coworkers have. As a big guy (6'2", 220 lbs), I learned a long time ago that if some angry guy or beligerent drunk picks a fight with me, I am probably going to hurt him if I engage. So, long before I became a nurse, I developed some fairly effective strategies for avoiding physical conflict. The thing is these work for me because I am big and I'm a male. I have known female coworkers with much better interpersonal skills than I possess who were unable to stop patients from making sexual comments and/or fondling them. If they complain to administrators frequently the solution is to take them off the case and send me. How fair is that?

[prairiecat]

Amen, you said it all. Being female is such a disadvantage in almost all instances. Nursing was/is predominantly a female occupation and therefore commands less respect than ANY other male dominated occupation. The pay is better than in the past, but still I believe would be better if more men were in the field. Nursing and teaching have a lot in common. I was a teacher and left education for nursing at too old an age in my opinion, as nursing is an exhausting job to begin at 56 years of age. But I do enjoy it very much. That being said, the commonalities in the two professions exist in my opinion because both were predominantly female occupations. the disrespect I encountered from both male supervisors, coworkers, and students while teaching was literally sickening. Yes, I had good years and good supervisors, and great students, but I also encountered some that caused me tremendous anxiety. I believe that most all of this occurred because I was female and that made me a bit inferior. I do see some of this in nursing and the male nurses are cut a bit more slack so to speak. Because I am older I do not tolerate indiscretions from my patients. Families on the other hand can be a problem. Let's say I am becoming a master at placating them. To sum it up: if there is indeed a thing called reincarnation I am coming back as a man, big and strong let there be no doubt about it. LOL

[prairiecat]

:madface:Amen, you said it all. Being female is such a disadvantage in almost all instances. Nursing was/is predominantly a female occupation and therefore commands less respect than ANY other male dominated occupation. The pay is better than in the past, but still I believe would be better if more men were in the field. Nursing and teaching have a lot in common. I was a teacher and left education for nursing at too old an age in my opinion, as nursing is an exhausting job to begin at 56 years of age. But I do enjoy it very much. That being said, the commonalities in the two professions exist in my opinion because both were predominantly female occupations. the disrespect I encountered from both male supervisors, coworkers, and students while teaching was literally sickening. Yes, I had good years and good supervisors, and great students, but I also encountered some that caused me tremendous anxiety. I believe that most all of this occurred because I was female and that made me a bit inferior. I do see some of this in nursing and the male nurses are cut a bit more slack so to speak. Because I am older I do not tolerate indiscretions from my patients. Families on the other hand can be a problem. Let's say I am becoming a master at placating them. To sum it up: if there is indeed a thing called reincarnation I am coming back as a man, big and strong let there be no doubt about it. LOL