What's the dumbest remark you've heard yourself make...

Nurses General Nursing

Published

OK, I'll go first----

It was a busy day in our pediatric office (what day isn't??) and I was running ragged, rooming patients, helping other staff, etc. and in between crises helping answer the phones-----I picked up a line that had been on hold for a while and chirped "Thank you for helping--can I hold you???" Needless to say, a good laugh was had by all....:uhoh3: :chuckle

Or the time I was working in the hospital and had walked in a patient's room. He was asleep; his phone rang and I answered it--it was his family, checking on how he was doing. My reply--"Oh, he's dead to the world..." (Southern for "He's sleeping peacefully").:eek: "WHAT???" "Uh (prying foot out of mouth), I mean, he's fast asleep....".

Yikes!!! PLEASE make me feel not so all alone by relating some goofy things YOU'VE said....

KidsRN

when working in a nursing home a new coworker asked where so and so was. I replied she is the one with grey hair and glasses with a sweater on.:cool::imbar

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I had an intubated patient who opened her eyes and looked at me. I said, "How are you feeling?" :smackingf She just looked at me, watching my face turn red. :imbarThen I said, "I guess you've been better." She nodded and smiled slightly.

That's OK it was the first thing a nurse looking after me in ICU said to me when I became conscious. If I hadn't a tube down my throat I would have laughed.

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We had a student once who for somereason did not seem to know why her patient was in hospital. Anyhoo she asks the guy "what are you in for?" The guy replies "cancer". The student says "OMG I am sorry my mom died of that last year!" (she didn't know what type or anything). I just called her out of the room quickly. Of course the guy complained.

Trouble is afterwards she still didn't understand why the guy got so upset.

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Specializes in NICU.

My mom was having surgery and was in the OR getting prepped & as she was being put under anesthesia she hears "Oh no, don't do that Steve." She said that was the last thing she heard before she was out. What a terrifying thing to hear as you are going under anesthesia. Who knows if that statement was regarding anything important or was just some random conversation. We laugh about it now.

In one of my clinicals in NS I had a kidney transplant patient. I am a kidney transplant patient so we were talking about our experiencesthroughout the day. At one point we are talking about her meds & she asks me what meds I take. I list off my meds & one of them is Procrit and I proceed to tell her how much that dang stuff stings during the injection. She is not on procrit and is saying how sorry she is that I have to do that to myself 3 times a week being it stings so badly. Well, I leave her room to go check on the orders her dr had just written & what do you know, he ordered procrit three times a week starting now. I had to go back in her room and say "Remember the Procrit injections I just told you about?" She says "Yeah, the ones you said hurt so badly." I say "yeah that one...Dr. Soandso just ordered it for you for 3X a week starting now." Ugh, I felt sooooooo bad. That's when I realized I couldn't work with transplant patients....I just want to spend the whole shift talking to them, comparing stories, & complaining about things that are going on. She was so super sweet about it and said I did a great job with the injection but I still felt terrible.

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Long day....Pt says "I fell and hurt my leg", me "which leg did you hurt?", him, looking like I'm completely crazy "Are you kidding?" - I look down, he's and amputee, only has a left leg. :eek: That would be the one he hurt. I told him - "hey at least you know I don't think of you as handicapped!" :loveya: (he'd also been my patient for 3 years THANK GOD!).

And people at school wonder why I'm never flustered in front of patients...I've made enough of a fool out of my ownself already.

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:lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: Hey, Domino's

I once called a date of birth in my clinic - had a couple of very confused takers:specs:

Gotta tell you I LOVE this thread, it's nice to know that other people can also fit their own feet in their mouths.

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I was on a roll recently while teaching an NRP course.

In a skills station: "The baby's limp is tone."

In lecture: "Suction the mouth first, then the nose. Remember it this way: you have one mouth and two noses."

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Specializes in Med-Surg, LTC, Rehab, HH.
Working in a clinic, I went to call the patient's name and instead yelled out the pizza place who sent him in (w/c).

That is funny:) :yeah:

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Specializes in -.

I sat a patient up in bed for her meal and told her I would "put her down" in a minute :rolleyes: My nurse in charge called me the Grim Reaper! Hahaha.

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Specializes in LTC, Dementia/Alzheimer's.
The worst one I can think of (and believe me there are plenty!), is when I was a new grad, and a CNA was helping me change the attends of a dementia pt. I ended up putting it on upside down, with the sticky tabs on top, and I told the CNA, "Sorry I'm not so good at this... I don't have kids." She shot me this "WTH" look, and I realized what I'd said. I was sooo embarrassed. First and last time that I ever compared an adult pt to an infant :uhoh21:

I don't see anything wrong with this. You weren't comparing the pt to an infant; you were talking about diapers. But I can see how it might have offended an oriented pt.

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Specializes in IMCU.
OK, I'll go first----

It was a busy day in our pediatric office (what day isn't??) and I was running ragged, rooming patients, helping other staff, etc. and in between crises helping answer the phones-----I picked up a line that had been on hold for a while and chirped "Thank you for helping--can I hold you???" Needless to say, a good laugh was had by all....:uhoh3: :chuckle

Or the time I was working in the hospital and had walked in a patient's room. He was asleep; his phone rang and I answered it--it was his family, checking on how he was doing. My reply--"Oh, he's dead to the world..." (Southern for "He's sleeping peacefully").:eek: "WHAT???" "Uh (prying foot out of mouth), I mean, he's fast asleep....".

Yikes!!! PLEASE make me feel not so all alone by relating some goofy things YOU'VE said....

KidsRN

As a student nurse I was thrilled to be able to hold the leg of a young hispanic woman who was finishing a hard labor. The young husband was in the labor room and was very supportive of his wife. The baby did not cry as quickly as we all hoped and the doctor told him in English that the baby would be okay she was just "tired" (cansado) once she started crying. He clearly did not understand and appeared more than a little distressed. Since I was so proud of my ability to communicate with this young couple in broken Spanish, I told him in my best Spanish that his baby was (casado) "married." He immediately said firmly in English, "No, she is NOT CASADO she is bebe!" I quickly appropriately apoligized for my mistake and we both had a good laugh along with the couple of staff who also spoke some Spanish. Given the stress he had been through he needed one. He will have a good story to tell her about the vieja who said that she was married at birth!

Mahage

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Specializes in IMCU.

The craziest thing i ever did was to take a blind patient to the door of the dialysis room and expect him to find his own chair. In my own defense i was not a nurse then, hadn't even worked with many blind people in my first few days as a dialysis Social Worker. I figured it out when he said politely, "Uh, mam could you walk me over there please?" I could have gone through the floor especially since I had just finshed an interview in which he had told me that he had been blind for the last two years.

Mahage

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