What is the worst thing a patient has ever said to you?

Nurses General Nursing

Published

Is it me, or are patients getting ruder and more disrespectful each time you clock in for work?

I don't usually let rude patients/families get to me, but last night I had to deal with the most insane people ever. I had the misfortune of informing the patient and his family that he had gone into rapid a-fib and his cardiologist was not on call. The patient didn't believe that he was having a rapid ventricular response since "he didn't feel that his heart was going fast," and had me count an apical pulse and call the monitor tech to see if she concurred with my rate. (I was off by 2 beats).

I was also instructed by the family to print a set of strips indicating that he was in fact in a-fib. Mind you, this patient has a history of a-fib and was on amiodarone for a while, but the family decided to stop it b/c the patient is allergic to iodine. Despite the allergy, he never had a reaction to amiodarone, but the family still didn't want him to have it and... ta-da! He went back into a-fib.

I was also yelled at because I had to start a Cardizem gtt and as this patient has a habit of going hypotensive, decided that BP checks q30 minutes was a prudent thing to do. Oh, I was also a bad nurse b/c I put him on 2L NC. Oh, and my hospital is ridiculous because we don't have those donuts for people to sit on... oh and there CAN'T be a good reason for us to not have them in central supply.

Did I also mention that I was lazy because I left the BP cuff on him and set the machine to recycle every 30 mts? Yes... I did that so I wouldn't have to go in the room all night. (He told this to the PCA and she came and told me) So he refused to leave the BP cuff on, and preferred for me to go in every 30 mts to put the cuff on and off (this only went on for 3 cycles... at this time, he fell asleep and I slipped it on over his gown). This is the same man who complained that us night shift don't let him sleep.

I just had to run out of the room at this point and cry... I usually handle these kind of people really well. Before last night I don't remember the last time I let a patient/family make me cry. :cry: I actually felt bad giving report on this patient in the morning... I felt horrible to pass this person on to another nurse!

*oh and the KICKER. During one of my visits for a BP check, I accidentally bumped his foot which he REFUSES to leave on the bed. He prefers to let his foot hang off the bed on the side I do my care on. He totally went off on me! Apparently during my BSN program I was taught not to be careful, but to bump patients' feet and cause them pain. I also after 3 years of working cardiac, am unfamiliar with caring for dialysis patients and I don't know how to monitor an a-fib patient. He can't wait until I'm sick in a hospital bed so he can give me what's coming to me. this is the most hurtful thing ANYBODY has ever said to me. I couldn't even respond. I just turned around and left the room.

Sorry this is so long, guys. I just really needed to vent.

"Are you related to *my father's name*? He sure likes to gamble."

Another patient's husband: "Your daddy sure could drink. I know that I took him home a couple of times."

one of the issues this patient had was that he felt like he was taking many meds and didn't know what they were for. MY issue was that when i tried teaching him and the family about these meds they weren't very open to learning from me, so i'd go on micromedex and print them a med info sheet, which they just folded and set down on the bedside table...

i do however love when patients say to me: "you're the nurse! you went to school for many years and know what's best for me. just tell me what you want me to do and i'll do it."

*HEARTS*

I would handle it differently. I would give short explanations for the purpose of each med, for example "this is for blood pressure," or "this is for your kidneys." If they want more explanation they will ask. I like my patients to know why they are taking their medications.

Right now I can't think of a specific incident, because I've only been a nurse for 2 years, but have a lot of public contact in other health positions, and etc. The older I age & experiences I have, I've learned to allow people to vent, & I try not to defend the situation. Some are wanting an argument, others are scared, many want to rattle your cage & put you on the defense. The only one that alows them to do this is YOU! Perform professionally as a RN, let them vent, and just because they say these negative remarks about you, does not make it true! Be a bigger individual/person than the horrible patient or family member, and always smile. It can irrritate the "Hell" out of those trying to put you on the defensive & can possibly change them. If given the opportunity, agree with them, & then the ball is back in their court.

Specializes in Telemetry, IMCU, s/p Open Heart surgery.
I immediately thought about other kinds of rudeness, such as a patient insisting on taking a phone call as I am at the bedside waiting to give him his truckload of medications so I can finish there, and try to get my other patients' medications to them in time.

oh yeah... lol, that's all the time... ppl are so rude.

Specializes in Telemetry, IMCU, s/p Open Heart surgery.
I would handle it differently. I would give short explanations for the purpose of each med, for example "this is for blood pressure," or "this is for your kidneys." If they want more explanation they will ask. I like my patients to know why they are taking their medications.

yeah... i tried that... it didn't work. these ppl were an anomaly.

i usually do just tell them, "this is your pain pill, this is to help you poop, etc" and ppl understand and are ok with it... but like i said, these people must be from another galaxy...

re the butt-wiper comments--

This brought back a funny memory. A nurse I worked with had no problem referring to herself as a butt-wiper. But one day she was at the pool and a guy who was admiring her asked her 3-y-o daughter what her mother did for a living. She innocently replied, "She wipes butts." The guy was shocked!

Specializes in LDRP.

-I have been told, by a pregnant patient (not in labor), that I looked pregnant. I was pregnant-6 weeks pregnant! So I said "yeah, I'm pregnant. 6 weeks. I look like this because I am fat"

Specializes in Operating Room.
I had a patient say "your the devil" over and over and over again.
LOL. I'd be so tempted to lean in close and ask "What gave me away?":D
Specializes in Psychiatry.
Wow...I am so glad I work with kids ONLY. I knew after my first clinical in med Surg that I didn't have the patience to take care of adults/elderly.

You WILL have to deal with adults/elderly, sorry. Oftentimes,they are harder to deal with than the kids.:twocents:

Specializes in ER.

I've had all kinds of rude and outrageous things said to me, two stand out in my mind.

One's rather general. (If you've ever been in a small town, you'll know it for the insult it is. People say it and are just curious, but some people say it.) "Honey, you ain't from around here, are you?" My reply depends on the pt and what I think will bug them the most. Well dressed 'people of status' get the "I hear that frequently. I suppose it's because my grandmother was very strict in regards to grammer and vocabulary." Other's get "Well, I moved from Connecticut." (Not entirely true, it was my final travel assignment.) Whooo-hoooo! A damm yankee, lol. Or I pour on my best honey-southern drawl and ask "Is this better?" I really love it when the Florida part-timers say it... I'm like, really? Which holler do you call home? I wish I had my husband's knack for accents, then I could really have fun.

Cuss me, call me names, but don't give me a backhanded insult and imply I don't have the sense to know what you're really saying.

The other was a chronic alcoholic. Not a pleasent fellow in the best of circumstances, and his trips to my ER are not usually under good terms. One of the first times I took care of him- he really pushed the limits. Keep in mind, he had two local cops ready at bedside. He wasn't in DT's and fully alert- just jonesing hard and belligerent.

First, I got to hear all about who he was 'before'. I learned all about all the land he owned and money he had- which by that point he'd lost. Then I got to hear about his extensive gun collection, which he had also lost as a result of a felony. He really rambled on about the guns- not quite making any threats but implying he'd get anyone who crossed him. The whole time, his often-beat wife was quietly providing him support. He wanted versed. He wanted ativan. He wanted a drink. No, he didn't want the %$@! IV. I had better get that versed, if I knew what was good for me. (Trust me, if my little hospital did it, I'd have been willing to get him that versed, and an ET to boot, and just hush him up... I mean, protect his airway and provide a compassionate way to ride out the DT's.) At one point, he looked me dead in the eye and told me 'I'd hate to see someone get hurt'. He meant it. Twit. I told him that I sure would hate to see someone get hurt as well- I generally disliked having to go to court. Besides, the only guns present in the room belonged to the two nice officers. (who at that point were about to 'subdue' Mr. Congeniality) One of them reminded him that there was a set of leather restraints with his name on them. I later learned it was no joke- pt really did have his own set. His house was raided as well, just to make sure he hadn't aquired any new guns. It would usually have creeped me out- but I was so fed-up by that time I just didn't care.

I took care of him many times after that. I found out that even though he beat his wife, he loved cats- go figure. After a conversation one night about pets, his cats, my cats, and animal planet- everything was cool. I still didn't trust him. Last I saw of him- he was end-stage liver and on his way to jail. Which made me wonder who was taking care of his cats. :confused:

Specializes in IMCU.
I've had all kinds of rude and outrageous things said to me, two stand out in my mind.

One's rather general. (If you've ever been in a small town, you'll know it for the insult it is. People say it and are just curious, but some people say it.) "Honey, you ain't from around here, are you?" My reply depends on the pt and what I think will bug them the most. Well dressed 'people of status' get the "I hear that frequently. I suppose it's because my grandmother was very strict in regards to grammer and vocabulary." Other's get "Well, I moved from Connecticut." (Not entirely true, it was my final travel assignment.) Whooo-hoooo! A damm yankee, lol. Or I pour on my best honey-southern drawl and ask "Is this better?" I really love it when the Florida part-timers say it... I'm like, really? Which holler do you call home? I wish I had my husband's knack for accents, then I could really have fun.

Cuss me, call me names, but don't give me a backhanded insult and imply I don't have the sense to know what you're really saying.

The other was a chronic alcoholic. Not a pleasent fellow in the best of circumstances, and his trips to my ER are not usually under good terms. One of the first times I took care of him- he really pushed the limits. Keep in mind, he had two local cops ready at bedside. He wasn't in DT's and fully alert- just jonesing hard and belligerent.

First, I got to hear all about who he was 'before'. I learned all about all the land he owned and money he had- which by that point he'd lost. Then I got to hear about his extensive gun collection, which he had also lost as a result of a felony. He really rambled on about the guns- not quite making any threats but implying he'd get anyone who crossed him. The whole time, his often-beat wife was quietly providing him support. He wanted versed. He wanted ativan. He wanted a drink. No, he didn't want the %$@! IV. I had better get that versed, if I knew what was good for me. (Trust me, if my little hospital did it, I'd have been willing to get him that versed, and an ET to boot, and just hush him up... I mean, protect his airway and provide a compassionate way to ride out the DT's.) At one point, he looked me dead in the eye and told me 'I'd hate to see someone get hurt'. He meant it. Twit. I told him that I sure would hate to see someone get hurt as well- I generally disliked having to go to court. Besides, the only guns present in the room belonged to the two nice officers. (who at that point were about to 'subdue' Mr. Congeniality) One of them reminded him that there was a set of leather restraints with his name on them. I later learned it was no joke- pt really did have his own set. His house was raided as well, just to make sure he hadn't aquired any new guns. It would usually have creeped me out- but I was so fed-up by that time I just didn't care.

I took care of him many times after that. I found out that even though he beat his wife, he loved cats- go figure. After a conversation one night about pets, his cats, my cats, and animal planet- everything was cool. I still didn't trust him. Last I saw of him- he was end-stage liver and on his way to jail. Which made me wonder who was taking care of his cats. :confused:

His loyal wifie of course!

Mahage

Specializes in IMCU.

Don't get me wrong from my reply to the last post. I strongly believe alcoholism is a disease. NO ONE wants to loose everything. I have a dear child in the throughs of it right now. She is ripping our hearts out and is in process of loosing everything and with her fragile physical conditon may loose her life.

I am sure someone loves the jerk you described also. Hopefully some day there will be more progress made in treatment and maybe even prevention. Until then, absolute abstinence is the only way and right now I alternate between being mad and scared for my child.

As a nurse I try to remember that someone loves the person who is giving me a hard time, but I don't take a whole lot of crap. It doesn't work to get my child (adult) straight and it won't work to make the mean drunk or other belligerent rude patients straighten up. I am kind but I set limits.

Mahage

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