What are your thoughts on giving cards/gifts to pts.?

Nurses General Nursing

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I am a floor nurse for almost three years. Cardiac floor so we seem to keep some pts for a while. I have gotten close to quite a few pts. This week there is one in particular. In with colon CA and multiple electrolyte issues. Anyway I had spent a LOT of time with him. One nite he told me that he wanted to buy my family and I supper. I told him thanks but he didn't have to do that. He said I know I don't HAVE to but I WANT to. I told him to wait till he got home and call me at work and we would set something up(having no intention on following thru with it) He said what do you mean by that? I said I just want you to get home then we'll talk. He looked at me and said..."I'm not going home." Broke my heart. The next day I brought him in 4 choc chip cookies( he had been craving them the nite before/appetite down staring on TPN)and a card with a smilely face on the front and on the inside it said I thought you could use a smile today. I spoke to the day charge prior to giving it--wasn't sure if it was appropriate. She said that she had never done it but thought it was a nice idea and didn't see why not. What do you all think??

In home health, I've had the opportunity to both give and receive small gifts or mementos from clients, especially around the holidays. I always have made certain that I refused something that was over the line in value. I've gone out of my way to get little necessities or nice-haves, on my own, for my clients when I felt so inclined. I would bring dog treats for my last client's little dog. No harm done, as long as you know not to go too far. I would give condolence cards with personal notes to families if a client passed away. However, I got burned on this one. I had sent a card to one of the families of someone who passed away and they sued us. It was only afterward, that I read in legal advice for nurses, that it is not a good practice to send condolences to the families of deceased patients (one reason being that your return address is on the envelope). This is one practice that I will not engage in again. For the 99 times out of 100 that little gestures are appreciated in both directions, I think it is a good thing to be able to express our human side to our clients.

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Specializes in Telemetry & Obs.

I've bought mints for a patient that was addicted to the darn things...and Hershey miniatures to contract with an Alzheimers patient that had the unfortunate habit of digging in her underpants :uhoh3:

Small things...tokens of warm thoughts :)

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and Hershey miniatures to contract with an Alzheimers patient that had the unfortunate habit of digging in her underpants :uhoh3:

:rotfl: That sounds like a heck of a smart trade off!! LOL

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I am so glad to hear all these warm stories. Someone had said that we take care of the patient physically and spiritually. That is true. With this particular patient, he did as much for me as I did for him. He appreciated the extra gentleness that I showed to him and I grately appreciated him reminding me why I became a nurse to begin with. When people are most vunerable we are truely blessed when we are the ones they can turn to for strength and comfort. I have been on the "other side" of this when my daughter was in the NICU. The sense of relief when a certain nurse was on duty, I could go home and actually unwind a little. That's why I became a nurse. He reminded me of that and I did Thank him for it.

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Specializes in Med Surg, Hospice.

I never have given cards/gifts, but I have dispensed my share of hugs and cheek kisses upon discharge.

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Specializes in ED, Pedi Vasc access, Paramedic serving 6 towns.

hi,

I think its ok, as long as it is just a friend type thing. I transported a 36 year old the other day just dx with lymphoma with mediastinal tumor, had a chest tube that was going to be long term so he could not longer work. Wife and a 7 and 4 year old at home, no disability. So I am sending his family a anonymous note with a couple gift cards.

Sweetooth

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Bless you!

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Specializes in Tele, Infectious Disease, OHN.

I had a patient who ended up with full blown AIDS. He went from home to hospital to nursing home..you know the rest. At various times I took him a Diet Coke, a newspaper, a package of Juicy Fruit gum. Do I do this for all of my patients? No. Thank goodness most of my patients have managed not to alienate everyone they know to the point no one even cares while they take 6 months to die. I certainly cannot judge the family members- who knows what their side of the story is. All you can do is use good judgement.

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I remember one doctor who was very much a part of the poor, often elderly community he worked in. A patient' family told me how he delivered the sermon at her mother's funeral, even remembering when she moved to the area in the 50's. Other patients told me of the wonderful letters of condolence he wrote when their family members died.

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Specializes in Geriatrics.

As a TA I had a pt who felt rather "unpretty". She was sent into the hospital w/o any of the things she always wore. I purchased her some earings and a necklace. SHe was thrilled when she woke up from her nap and found them on her tray table ( tried to slip them to her un-noticed). Her mood brightened comsiderably when she wore them. It's not wrong, we have to care for all aspects of thier health including thier mental status. Sometimes it's the little things that make a difference.

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Specializes in Community, OB, Nursery.

When I was a brand-new nurse (not even off orientation yet) I had a young (late-20s) man with end-stage AIDS, wasted, KS lesions everywhere, horrible peripheral neuropathy, you name it. On isolation for MRSA in everything, so I had to wear gown/mask/gloves every time I went in there. He was so tired and weak he struggled to get out a ten word sentence.

He was my pt for several days and we bonded really fast. During one of our conversations, he allowed as how he really wanted a Butterfinger. (no family visiting, partner had long since split :madface:)

During my lunchbreak, I went down to the gift shop & bought him a Butterfinger. I didn't even ask anyone before I gave it to him. If they'd wanted to give me crap over giving a candy bar to a dying man, I would've quit right there, so fast it would've spun heads. (fortunately, nobody cared.)

The look on that poor man's face was priceless. He died not too long after that. Never got out of the hospital. If that 85 cents I spent made him that happy, it was some dang well-spent money.

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It is so good to hear how many of us truely care for the "person" we treat vs. the "patient".

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