What was the MOST ridiculous thing a patient came to the ER for?

And did you have to treat them?

I am just curious. Your stories always seem to either crack me up or shake my head in amazement.

Thanks for sharing ?

[wahwahgerman]

Years ago when I was working in another city, I got a patient from the ER with the admitting diagnosis of "decubitus ulcer." Now I thought that was mighty strange until I actually saw the patient. He had a decub all right -- the exact size, shape and depth of a toilet seat.

When asked how he got a pressure sore like that, he said he'd been sitting on the toilet for four days and four nights.

"Why were you sitting there for so long?"

"Looking for God."

He had multiple surgerys and months of antibiotics -- he was still there a year later when I changed jobs!

Silly guy...everyone knows you find God in prison, not on the toilet.

[Nprifti]

I had a woman come to the ED by EMS for feeling "hot" not feverish just hot.

EMS informed me that the woman had her heat turned up in her house to somewhere in the 80s.

It was summer time in North Carolina.

I guess the EMS crew tried to explain to her that she felt hot because her house was like an oven. She didnt belive them and came in anyway.

[LCLARN]

A mother brought in her 11 year old daughter with c/o "lump" and pain around her nipple.....duh? DX: Breast Buds!

[tagaBohol_RN]

had a lady come in thru triage complaining of a pimple !!! :)

what did she want me to do, pop it?

[inteRN]

Just yesterday I had a girl come in c/o itching after shaving......with rubbing alcohol. WT???

[sharpeimom]

just yesterday i had a girl come in c/o itching after shaving......with rubbing alcohol. wt???

:eek: ouchie! :eek:

kathy

shar pei mom:paw::paw:

[MidwestMedSurgRN-BC]

When I worked nightshift there was many times I thought about renting a van and going down to the ER and asking all of those that was constipated, thought they was pregnant, and had a fever of 99 degrees to raise their hands. I was going to offer to take them to Walmart and help them get the items required to solve their medical issues and save some money:)

[rt_to_nurse]

I work night shift in the ED. At about 1AM woman and her husband came in to walk in triage with the wife complaining of urinary retention. Our usual procedure with ambulatory patients is to give them a gown and specimen cup and ask them to change into a gown and provide a urine sample. When I reached my patient, she was sitting in bed in her gown and she handed me a specimen cup with about 45 ml of clear yellow urine in it. When asked what she was here for she repeated "urinary retention." I asked if the urine in the cup she just handed me was hers. She assured me that it was. I then asked when she had last been able to urinate. She said, "8PM."

Now, I'm not sure about you, but I've gone much, much longer than 5 hours without peeing. Also, I'm pretty sure that the urine specimen she handed me proved she was not actually suffering from urinary retention. To be thorough, I continued interviewing and assessing the patient who gave details consistent with a possible UTI (feeling of having to urinate with not much urine actually being produced, some mild lower abdominal pressure / pain, and burning with urination). I explained that she may possibly have a UTI and sent her urine to the lab. The husband proceeded to tell me that he was pretty sure she as having urinary retention and that he wanted me to "insert a tube to drain it out." I explained that 1). I didn't think a foley was indicated as she is obviously able to produce urine as evidenced by the urine sample she handed me and 2). I can't insert a foley without a doctor's order anyway.

So... they eloped before seeing a doctor.

[JWaldron]

had a lady come in thru triage complaining of a pimple !!! :)

what did she want me to do, pop it?

Oh-Oh! That's dangerous. You should have done something! Many years ago when I still worked in the ED, we had a young guy come into the dept. several days running, w/ that complaint. The doc told him each time that we weren't there to treat his pimples, and sent him on his way. On about the 5th day, he went into a local store, took a hostage, walked the guy down the street to the local church, held him there for a couple of hours, then shot him in the face, and then killed himself in front of the alter. We really should have squeezed his pimple.

(The guy he shot had a through and through GSW of the maxillary sinuses, eventually recovered, and did very well, though it took a long while.)

Savvy

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

i am offended.

you clearly have no idea what it is like to be poor. have you ever had to ration food so your children would be able to eat? i doubt it.

i grew up poor -- no plumbing, no electricity and we didn't eat anything we couldn't grow. i'm not offended. lighten up, lady!

[smarti15]

I have only done clinicals in the ER and that was enough for a laugh or two:

rectal pain: patient states I had sex "back there"

Abdominal pain: patient states that if we can't get through the scar tissue in his veins to start his IV, he can...and btw when can I get a breakfast tray?

Some people.....

[snyderrobyn]

I love those who say, "I called ahead" thinking that it then means they'll get in right away with the sniffles........hahahaha